Hallo Goddess Commies!

What are your personal spiritual/metaphysical beliefs?

Other urls found in this thread:

hermetic.com/crowley/aa/Raja Yoga by Swami Vivekananda.pdf
vivekananda.net/PDFBooks/KarmaYoga.pdf
youtube.com/watch?v=7hZVWuMEbFI
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hindu_cosmology
youtube.com/watch?v=-evIyrrjTTY
srichinmoy.org/spirituality/our_path
youtube.com/watch?v=VABSoHYQr6k
marxists.org/reference/subject/philosophy/works/en/magee.htm
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

Bad with the typos today. Godless.

i think there might be good reason to believe reincarnation exists to some degree

nice meme

I'm learnin your memes. So the guy driving is Stirner but who's riding shotgun?

During the 1200's there was 10 to 15 million people in the entire world. Nowdays there's 7 billion.
It makes absolutely no sense. 0, none. And this only believing that when people die, only reincarnate as other people. Because there's those who believe you could reincarnate as anything. That makes it even more hilarious, considering that the ant population i.e. is far superior to the human population.

I believe there might be good reason to believe you are retarded to some degree

The next question will be, what proof is there that this
state beyond thought and reasoning is the highest state? In
the first place, all the great men of the world, much greater
than those that only talk, men who moved the world, men
who never thought of any selfish ends whatever, have
declared that this is but a little stage on the way, that the
Infinite is beyond. In the second place, they not only say so,
but lay it open to everyone, they leave their methods, and all
can follow in their steps. In the third place, there is no other
way left. There is no other explanation. Taking for granted
thhat there is no higher state, why are we going through this
circle all the time; what reason can explain the world?
The sensible will be the limit to our knowledge if we cannot go
farther, if we must not ask for anything more. This is what is
called agnosticism. But what reason is there to believe in the
testimony of the senses? I would call that man a true
agnostic who would stand still in the street and die. If reason
is all in all it leaves us no place to stand on this side of
nihilism. If a man is agnostic of everything but money, fame
and name, he is only a fraud. Kant has proved beyond all
doubt that we cannot penetrate beyond the tremendous dead
wall called reason. But that is the very first idea upon which
all Indian thought takes its stand, and dares to seek, and
succeeds in finding something higher than reason, where
alone the explanation of the present state is to be found.
This is the value of the study of something that will take us
beyond the world. “Thou art our Father, and wilt take us to
the other shore of this ocean of ignorance;” that is the
science of religion; nothing else can be.

hermetic.com/crowley/aa/Raja Yoga by Swami Vivekananda.pdf

I believe that the universe is cold and empty and devoid of much life. It is full of chaos on every scale that only shows itself through the slow passage of millions of years to the fast passage of light and quanta.

There isn't anything else that's it

Irreligious but the thought of nothingness scares me. I can't put my faith in any religion though

Maybe on the frequency band you perceive things it is.

Not to mention Darwinism, RNA/Protein World Hypotheses. Life had to start at one point, since then it gets more complex, species multiply, their numbers grow. Reincarnation is mathematically impossible.

Somebody really needs to pop your bubble, Braille.

You can't perceive all you want. Every time you develop a health condition just remember it's reminder of your mortality. There isn't any way to shock a second you back to life and have your neurons fire again once you die. And there isn't any way to have a human immaterial from the billions of neurons that make it up.

You are suspicious there's more to life, you aren't unique. You're going to die anyways, and in that respect, you're also not unique.

embrace the void

I believe that there are machinations of the universe, grand motions of coincidence which by their very nature will always ultimately escape human comprehension. This can be likened to Lao Tzu's concept of the Tao, as it is not dissimilar.

I'm deist

Kandisnky's About spirituality in art is my bible

What was not born cannot die. So I am unique in that way. But so are you!

Secular humanist

inb4triggerednihilists

A naturalist process philosophy. Does such a view necessarily prevent me from going full on eliminativism, because of some bare minimum metaphysics required? Whichever the answer may be, whether yea or nay, let the professional debate it amongst themselves, I couldn't care less. I guess I should add pragmatist or neo-pragmatist there.

I am a destructionist. It is a new philosophy.

If you really think about it religions in general promise too much positivity to be all that real. You can't combine totally different ideas and merge them.

In today's monotheism, you have a a God that creates the universe. That's fine, unproovable, something may perhaps do that however unlikely it may be.

But you have a God that cares enough to resurrect every dead soul, but does not care enough to consider how they die. Or the biological fact a human is a sophisticated bundle of neurons and grey matter.

You can't just take that away and have a magic invisible person called a soul. A soul would also need neurons and I think we would have found this phenomenon by now in the same way we would have found evidence of the tooth fairy or santa's elves.

It's too complex for its own good not to collapse in on itself with scrutiny. Should have just kept it at "something created the universe" and not promised anything else that might be disproven by future study

It kind of smells of the period it was written in, when people didn't know much how this all worked.

This is really stupid and you're not all that clever.

Who wants to be immortal anyway.

Let me translate the first half to human speak.

What reason is there to believe that reincarnation is true?
1) All the wise men said it, so it must be true.
(wow, much wisdom)
2) These wise men did things, and left behind teachings on those things, so it must be true.
(wow, much wisdom)
3) Because there's no other explanation.
(wow, best wisdom so far, 10/10)
4) If it weren't true, how could you explain this? If it weren't true, how could you explain this? If it weren't true, how could you explain this? If it weren't true, how could you explain this?
(wow, wow, wow)

…

see this is why we needed the new atheists

Probably you since you have a preoccupation with the supposed inevitability of death.

Spinozian pantheist. Fairly apathetic towards the universe at large.

Redpill me on humanism

It's a secular religion.

churches: there's a human soul
humanists: there's a human essence

You're wearing nothingness colored glasses. Try taking them off and see if it helps with comprehension!

What's there not to love about death.

Everyone hip throughout history died. Seems like a good time, since there's no time.

Honestly, there should just be a religion that doesn't make you fear death or become selfish with grief at the loss of a loved one but list the perks.

For one, you're not living anymore. That's a great perk. I think you in particular should try it, since we already have enough people in the world who see everything in patterns and gut feelings.

yeah, like, totally, man.

humanism doesn't even say that humans are special necessarily or above animals, it's more like the opposite, we're rationalists

"Secular humanism posits that human beings are capable of being ethical and moral without religion or a god. It does not, however, assume that humans are either inherently evil or innately good, nor does it present humans as being superior to nature. Rather, the humanist life stance emphasizes the unique responsibility facing humanity and the ethical consequences of human decisions. Fundamental to the concept of secular humanism is the strongly held viewpoint that ideology—be it religious or political—must be thoroughly examined by each individual and not simply accepted or rejected on faith. Along with this, an essential part of secular humanism is a continually adapting search for truth, primarily through science and philosophy. Many Humanists derive their moral codes from a philosophy of utilitarianism, ethical naturalism, or evolutionary ethics"

Life is meant to be enjoyed. Why do you do anything if not to enjoy it?

You're only making yourselves miserable.

Where did I imply not enjoying it?

Well I mean you're right, I'm not. Once you become an adult in the present time, life ceases to be much fun unless you get off on a little large scale s/m

Nature is still mostly untouched and ready to be enjoyed as it was for millennia.

Wow, that makes soo much sense! You made me realize that due to my colorless glasses that I didn't take off I refused true enjoyment! Please give me all your religious books and lead me to the cult leader so I can be a good religious person!

Unless the you was also referencing me specifically.

>2016

Have you heard the good word of the The L. Ron?

This is a lie everyone tells themselves to say there's more. Nature is being violently raped into decay anyways, by the time you have enough money to see anything most of it will be shit.

You're stuck looking at pictures of Yosemite or the Yukon on the internet.

This harlot with the sex seems to be more convincing and offering more enjoyment to me than that other idiot with the scripture.

Who needs money I'll just go Johnny Appleweed. And seed the highways with the finest Sativas.

I meant hard shit like nails and meat hooks, some Hellraiser shit.

That's what life is eventually for everyone and once it begins it never ends

Nature can't be raped. But if you really want to antropomorphize it, then If anything, it has been raping us through 99% of our human history, it has been the biggest mass killer.

Stop defending the fucking void. Stop projecting reason, emotions into it, ffs. What is this, fucking kindergarten?

I offer you nothing you didn't have inside you to begin with?

Also when was sex offered? That does sound like a good deal….

Sartrean existentialist tbqh fam

Once again I typoed. But the triple 8s are telling me it was the right thing to do.

Nature can be raped in the sense what you enjoy about it will be gone. What you say you enjoy is a human thing, unless you enjoy seeing patterns ocean acidification and how fun it is to see rising fungal outbreaks in hotter and hotter weather

You can also enjoy seeing everything pleasant looking die

So, just run with this scenario with me for a sec. You and I meet. You see my superior redpill alpha-male family-provider more-agency-than-woman blonde haired personage and you fall in love with me who is the best. We get to sexy time. What happens then?

*details*

I pass you on the street like everyone does and you pass me on the street like everyone does.

No gods, no masters!

perfect, more time to read theory

*sad sniff*

pantheism

It's a lot more enjoyable than straight sex anyways. We're both having fun, the reading rainbow helps all.

Nevermind. Are these metaphorical nails and meat hooks?

This isn't Cheese Pizza related is it?

Both yes and no. Becoming elderly means your joints and muscles feel like they're dying, so as if there were meat hooks and nails

Pain is purely subjective. Princess and The Pea vs. Monks with dumbbells suspended from their junk.

Tell me pain is subjective when you develop arthritis and your bones start to become brittle and easy to snap

I've experienced pains like you couldn't imagine. Soul pains. That shit is something serious. But besides that point we all have our various pains that we carry around with us in our day to day life on a 'metaphysical' which over time, with the weakening of the will, manifest into physical problems, but these can be avoided if you fave the metaphysical pain directly before it can manifest and the thing that will surprise you afterwords is how nothing the pain was to begin with. Just like getting a shot, if you're needle-phobic it'll be a nightmare, if you just face it and let it proceed it will be over in an instant, no harm done.

life

Jazz?

You have nothing to relate it to you so it will remain meaningless text for you. I could show you but why would you want to see it? Would you get off?

haven't read any of him but I think it's renzo novatore

nah fuck those

should I become a humanist?

SMASH ALL SUPERSTITION

All devout people are batshit insane, self righteous hypocrites. Whether it's "Christians" that can't turn the other cheek, or "Muslims" practicing Taquiyya, or "Jews" being total hedonists.

No man is virtuous enough to handle "divinity" or to truly follow their "sacred texts". I say we cut the crap already, and base our morals on our earthly reality. Give me the fedora, I couldn't care less.

No, it's complete shit

Thanks.

Had a feeling that was the pun but I'm so ignorant of Western philosophers that it was no help to me.

Why is there so much
disturbance, so much fighting and quarrelling in the name of
God? There has been more bloodshed in the name of God
than for any other cause, and the reason is that people never
went to the fountain head; they were content only to give a
mental assent to the customs of their forefathers, and wanted
others to do the same. What right has a man to say he has a
soul if he does not feel it, or that there is a God if he does not
see Him? If there is a God we must see Him, if there is a
soul we must perceive it; otherwise it is better not to believe.
It is better to be an outspoke atheist than a hypocrite.

hermetic.com/crowley/aa/Raja Yoga by Swami Vivekananda.pdf

...

Make sense tho doesn't it? If you walk too slow you won't catch your bus, if you don't believe hard enough(doubt too much) you won't see God.

...

...

I have some vaguely Gnostic beliefs mixed in with a Lovecraftian cosmology

...

Once you get beyond that phase and realize there's nothing, going in believing in that, come back around to Christianity once you're done, reach back around into understanding its bullshit, possibly at this point going back into seeing patterns that aren't there, being open to Christianity despite understanding its bullshit, going into deism, going into gnosticism, seeing those patterns again, and then just realizing its been your brain just fucking with you seeing patterns that aren't there and there is truly nothing but the cold vacuum of space filled with gas and matter

that's where the fun starts. You have to have some years on you but at some point you're just going to not understand there's nothing

You're going to
understand
there's nothing.

What I just said was a long diatribe and it's probably incoherent, but you'll know it when you see it. There's a point where you start aging combined with knowledge and experience, and dabbling in everything, you just truly understand that there is nothing more powerful than human beings in a group.

Sounds like you gave up. But you still find energy to preach this message. That's the conundrum.

I think I understand where you're coming from. Sounds a bit like what I believe honestly. The bullshit about "Lovecraftian cosmology" is probably better described as a vague hope than anything else.

Also if you will notice in your spooky picture. Ok you got death angel lady welcoming you with open arms if you look at it that ways. But what's this giant orb of light standing right behind death angel lady? It's almost as if death angel lady is blocking us from reaching this wondrous orb of light!

I'm discordian

Just because I have the energy to share an idea doesn't mean I necessarily don't believe said idea. You can have the energy to say anything you want without it being anything more than it is.

I replied too fast. I thought you were on your pessimistic musings. I missed that you ended on a positive note.

I don't see how it follows anything preceding it but I agree with this:

So deep, lad.

Not as deep as you tho m8. ;)

All ethics, all human action, and all human thought, hang
upon this one idea of unselfishness; the whole idea of human
life can be put in that one word, unselfishness. Why should
we be unselfish? Where is the necessity, the force, the
power, of my being unselfish? Why should I be? You call
yourself a rational man, a utilitarian, but, if you do not show
me a reason, I say you are irrational. Show me the reason
why I should not be selfish, why I should not be like a brute,
acting without reason? It may be good as poetry, but poetry
is not reason. Show me a reason. Why shall I be unselfish,
and why be good? Because Mr. and Mrs. So-and-so says so
does not weigh with me. Where is the utility of my being
unselfish? My utility is to be selfish, if utility means the
greatest amount of happiness. I may get the greatest amount
of happiness by cheating and robbing others. What is the
answer? The utilitarian can never give it. The answer is that
this world is only one drop in an infinite ocean, one link in
an infinite chain. Where did those that preached
unselfishness, and taught it to the human race, get this idea?
We know it is not instinctive; the animals, which have
instinct, do not know it. Neither is it reason; reason does not
know anything about these ideas? Whence did they come?
We find, in studying history, one fact held in common by
all the great teachers of religion the world ever had; they all
claim to have got these truths from beyond, only many of
them did not know what they were getting. For instance, one
would say that an angel came down in the form of a human
being, with wings, and said to him, “Hear, oh man, this is the
message.” Another says that a Deva, a bright being,
appeared to him. Another says he dreamed that his ancestor
came and told him all these things. He did not know
anything beyond that. But this thing is common, that all
claim either that they say angels, or heard the voice of God,
or saw some wonderful vision. All claim that this
knowledge came to them from beyond, not through their
reasoning power. What does the science of Yoga teach? It
teaches that they were right in claiming that this knowledge
came to them from beyond reasoning, but that it came from
within themselves.

If you wanted to provide a counter argument, not even God would want to read something from someone who presses enter for no reason this many times. He's probably more likely to send you to hell.

How do you know my keystrokes? Are you using a keylogger witch?

For your info it was a click>Ctr-C>Click>Click>Ctr-V>Click type of maneuver.

Discordianism: the self-depricating and ironic religion that doesn't realize that it only portrays the late capitalist mode of belief.

Well, well. I think I'm going to call it a day, godless commies.

I'll leave it on a Lao note:

“A leader is best
When people barely know he exists
Of a good leader, who talks little,
When his work is done, his aim fulfilled,
They will say, “We did this ourselves.”
― Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

Please tell me you realize what a fallacious dribble this is and just jokingly displaying this wall of vomit.

Ooooohhh you're tempting me godless commies. Yuhh tooo thicc in head boy. First you have to open a hole and only then can the knowledge seep in.

All things evolve with time. So just give it some.

You can drill big a hole as you like, a fallacious argument remains one. Just because you make it easier to swallow it (denial) it's still fallacious.

That's why these alt right/Neo-Nazi fucks are more entertaining and tolerable than yall. At least they prominently display right there on the Sandwich packaging: MAY CONTAIN FECAL MATTER.

But no, you lefties try and pretend you're giving me some fancy organic Paninini, but wait? What's this distinct shitty taste that lingers after every bite?

I have a saying when it comes to posts and their quality.

The y'all says it all.

It's like yous people like being lonely and miserable. I guess you can no longer be wrong when no one ever can tolerate your stench long enough to hang around and debate yous.

See you tomorrow

Woops I read this wrong because your posts are awful. I thought you said "I guess I can't tolerate your stench", I was sad for a second that you wouldn't find a Quixotic way to yell at communists on a message board for communists

Yes, because it is typically atheists that are miserable.

Easy: what goes around comes around. Retribution. Revenge. Rancour. Saltiness. Butthurt.

Think of how the Nazis went to war believing no one would fight back, and think of the ultimate consequences of this type of belief.

I'ma class it up. The pure dismissive bullshit was getting to me I'll admit. If you have nothing to say than why say it? Nah mean?

But anyways it just seems to me that yall are being purposefuly offputting as to preserve the sanctity of your board so I will bow to the forces of greater shittiness and concede the battle. This section of the chan is once again safe!

Oh yes most definitely yes. Why do you think you fucks are confused all the time while true believers are contented?

Maybe the Karma Yoga would be more for you: vivekananda.net/PDFBooks/KarmaYoga.pdf

haha, sure

youtube.com/watch?v=7hZVWuMEbFI

No, don't mix the abstract concept of "Karma" or "universal justice" with the premeditated actions and decisions of vengeful men.

You can have faith to anyone from a comic book character to a fan of a tv show to make you happy

But ultimately keeping a realistic approach just happens to be pessimistic because our future is fucked. There's nothing confused about that, unhappy sure, but you're saying plugging your ears and shutting your eyes is preferable to making informed decisions, and of course you're right.

But in the long term who are you going to blame when God could have prevented what man created of his planet? Man?

Then you are still alone with man, and without God.

You were just literally describing the Law of Karma.

Every motion is in a circle. If you could take
up a stone, and project it into space, and then live long
enough, that stone would come back exactly to your hand. A
straight line, infinitely projected, must end in a circle.
Therefore, this idea that the destiny of man is progression
ever forward and forward, and never stopping, is absurd.
Although extraneous to the subject, I may remark that this
idea explains the ethical theory that you must not hate, and
must love, because, just as in the case of electricity, or any
other force, the modern theory is that the power leaves the
dynamo and completes the circle back to the dynamo. So
with all forces in nature; they must come back to the source.
Therefore do not hate anybody, because that force, that
hatred, which comes out from you, must, in the long run,
come back to you. If you love, that love will come back to
you, completing the circuit. It is as certain as can be, that
every bit of hatred that goes out of the heart of man comes
back to him full force; nothing can stop it, and every impulse
of love comes back to him.

hermetic.com/crowley/aa/Raja Yoga by Swami Vivekananda.pdf

I know this will sound like a 'No true Scotsman' argument to you, buuuuuuuuuttttt………… they aren't true believers.

...

So hypothetically: If you or I had omnipotence right now, what would you do to avert cataclysm?

Yes, but the idea that "the universe will dispense justice" is opposite to the men who actually want to fight and bleed to create their own justice.

If you agree with the tenets then sure why not

tfw your guru failed physics class

Gawd, you can't be so close- minded. That's a methapor. The rock wouldn't of course return physically just spiritually.

Ideally just make a better world somewhere else. Earth is a lost cause for humanity, they fucked themselves.

So… are you a true believer?

false humility in 3… 2… 1…

From what position are you talking?

He passed Vedic-Physics. There's nothing a westerner could teach him:

-Carl Sagan

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hindu_cosmology

That's where you keep losing me is with the despondency.

No sir not an ounce of false humility in me. I'm one hundred percent a true believer. And when I'm not content I know it's because I've given in to Earthly doubt, then I float on back up to my cloud and I'm at one with my faith again.

The one from the religious source you worship. Why bother exhausting the amount of energy and resources into a universe for a tiny spec for some organisms you already know are going to fuck themselves and told them about it in Eschatological prophecy.

If the point of the world was human suffering for a love hate relationship

This is just Star Wars prequel tier writing. God sounds like Sheev

The thing you're doing right now?

I haven't given up on you yet Chaos Witch.

None.

...

If God can't stop me from dying right now to send me to hell for worshiping Barry Manilow instead of him, why shouldn't I masturbate with a Hitachi

I hope you're not about to die, chaos witch, unless you're talking about Les Petit Mort.

Me personally I'm into that kind of thing. Yogis would advocate for strict celibacy, for them it would be more considered a diversion/distraction than a sin.

Shwooop shwoop I might be going off the deep end for yall but if you want a sex positive New Agey philosophy peep:

lawofone.info

Warning this book was written in the 70s by a woman channeling the Ra-Social-Memory-Complex so don't say I didn't warn you.

...

On the sacrilege note. All the philosophies I've been linking to are what they call nondualist, so worshipping Barry Manilow as God is as valid as worshiping any other aspect of God.

“I am Ra. The Law of One, though beyond the limitations of name, as you call vibratory sound complexes, may be approximated by stating that all things are one, that there is no polarity, no right or wrong, no disharmony, but only identity. All is one, and that one is love/light, light/love, the Infinite Creator.”

I think you need to see a psychiatrist

Yupp yupp yupp. Right back to dismissiveness. I only do this out of good will or entertainment value and you seem to find joy in depleting both.

I think you need to see a psychiatrist

You still hung up on that? I guess my joke was obtuse but I in no way meant to threaten you I was just calling attention to the fact that you wrote the phrase: "God can't stop me from dying right now"

So I was just joking that I hope you didn't need divine intervention on that front.

On a related/side note: Just Say No to Pills!

Also riddle me dis? I stand on International space station. I throw stone.in perfect parallel line with my own orbit: Where will that stone eventually reach?

Pretty sure that's just the stylization of divine halos you see in christian artwork around the heads of saints and angels. The source is youtube.com/watch?v=-evIyrrjTTY

But what does the Halo itself represent? That's what I'm getting at. The Holy Spirit? The infinitely abstract and ultimately intangible form of God.

So be it an angel or a demon. The source is the same no matter the manifestation.

...

Well since it was dieing down anyways. I'll once again acknowledge the futility of trying to describe the ineffable.

The best I can do is try and point people in the right direction. But it really is all in your hands.

I'll just say as you come more and more to understand it the more and more everything in existence will become clear to you.

And much love to all of you.

One last things since you were talking about mental confusions as pertaining to the spiritual path:

srichinmoy.org/spirituality/our_path

I'm a catholic.

orbital debris

So you like young boys?

What? No, why?

I'm such a druggie. This immediately had different meaning to me.

Guy from Happy Days?

spirituality is retarded

youtube.com/watch?v=VABSoHYQr6k

Goddamn anfem, have another hug ;~;

There are still some great places to see. But you're right, most workers don't have the ability to just pack up & explore. The only thing that was holding me back was addiction. Otherwise, I never had shit for capital & didn't have anything to lose, so I would have traveled. I always wanted to leave the US, and I got lucky so I finally got the opportunity.

People forget how great the internet really is & the opportunity it can give them. I found love with it, and was able to get out of my shithole & leave the country. Good things can happen.

Take acid or shrooms

Ive done mescaline, spirituality is still stupid.

…Lovecraftian?

The Universe is huge & we still don't understand basically shit about it. I'm openminded. Many scientists believe mutliverses exist. I love that no matter how much more we learn about existence, the more we realize we don't understand.

I'll give a list of books to read so you fags can know truth

You found Atlantis yet?

the only mention of Atlantis is in one one of these books, the one that does just uses it as a very vague theory on why many religions have similar symbolism in them.

I believe in myself

Utter determinism.

I bounce between 'that means that there is nothing to worry about' and 'everything is pointless'

and then I go on some self improvement kick which I can't help thinking I am only able to do because I had it easy, which brings me right back round to utter determinism

Hegelian Mysticism

marxists.org/reference/subject/philosophy/works/en/magee.htm

I have a feeling I'm gonna be a little different than everyone here.

I believe all the ancient deities are real forces, they just get called different names by different peoples. It's not just something I think, but something I experienced.

I was raised in a highly sheltered Christian home where everything I witnessed was very highly regulated.

And yet, at the wizened old age of 6 years old, I had a "dream" where I was dragged from my body by a dark shadow creature and thrown onto the top of a column that went down forever into an ever darkening abyss. On the horizon was nothing but a deep blue haze, and four colossal statues that were very far away, but were so large that they obstructed large portions of the sky.

I was forced by an unseen pressure to kneel and devote my life to serve them. In the dream, I knew them very well, though in waking life I had never seen these idols before.

Later in life, I did some research and found them to be the statues of Anubis, Kali, Loki and Eris, whom I have felt a connection to ever since.

If I divulge further experiences, though, Holla Forums will tell me to take my meds and fuck off to /x/, so I'll stop there. But yeah, I definitely believe in cosmic deities, having seen them without precedent when I was an extremely sheltered toddler.

Perhaps you should go under psychoanalysis?