Video games in HELL

Reality is the first circle of Hell, isn't it?

Hell is other anons.

Enjoy your vidya

Furcadia only.

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then we're already here

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I see qhat you are saying and I would like to add this

This is the worst because most terrible because of issues with development. This one, in theory, had everything it needed to be decent in a time where releasing an incompletely game is ok.

That means we'd have a fun game that we don't even need to mod, right? A bit bloated, but still fun.

So basically EA's sloppy excuse of a fucking NBA Jam sequel where the fucking friendly AI does jackshit while the opposing team gangrapes you to death in the first quarter. While all your defensive options don't work because EA didn't take the fucking time to make sure the fucking spin move worked, while Midway fucking perfected all these fucking commands in 96 with NBA Hangtime.

But seriously, fuck NBA Jam On Fire, Larry Bird should never fucking miss three pointers ever. Not against the bullshit Jambots when I could rain threes from any part of the fucking court.

Take a pick user, we're already there.

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Really shitty games that are agony to play. Imagine nothing but Gone Home and Pretentious Game 1-4 clones.
My question is what video games will Heaven have?

The base game would be good, but it would still be vanilla as fuck.

an alternate Cargo Commander where you play as a "strong" overweight womyn who sexually identifies as an alien with disgusting lipstick and multicolored painted nails
instead of pressing f to say 'fuck you' you press p to say 'check your privellege'
asking enemies to check their privellege makes them say the patriarchy made them do it "assigned male" style

the aliens and by the way the politically correct term is 'extra-terrestrials' shitlord are minorities and as such your friends, so they are replaced by the real enemies, cis white heterosexual male humyns, who are extremely weak and cannot damage the player despite still having attack animations
the multiplayer-ish aspects are left in except for the competitive aspects like the score and leaderboard because we don't want the children to feel challenged but is heavially moderated and anyone who writes a letter that isn't feminist enough will be immediately banned

caps are replaced by shekels, which are ridiculously common and found on the floor, but are completely pointless as both score and upgrades are removed (the upgrades are ableist, capitalist, and actually fun, you see)
weapons are removed, asking men to check their privellege is your ridiculously effective only line of defense from the zero thread the white males pose

instead of collecting cargo you collect physical manifestations of genders, all of which are paid in reperations to the aliens at the end of the day so there is absolutely no long-term progress
different sectors were removed because they were too complicated, space was removed because it was found to be rape and caused pstd, and your character is too fucking fat to jump so you can only move left and right

the letters your son sends you are assigned male comics and the e-mail you receive on the computer are leaked hillary clinton emails

tl:dr
you literally just go left and right collecting obscene amounts of useless shekels while spamming p to tell all the enemies to check their privellege and collecting fake genders and letters written by other players telling you to not vote trump
the game is named
CUNT COMMANDER

Walking simulators, half-finished prototypes of games with great potential and games you once loved with no other players but yourself ever online. Nothing is more soul-crushing than memories of a community you know is never coming back.

IIRC this game is made almost entirely with free assets from the developer's kit.

Fucking noob

All we do in hell is play DDR

This is hell m8

All those jap devs who kill themselves from overworking while working as gamedevs probably spend eternity in hell devving, so there must be tons of new, original games. Probably good ones too.
But you're not allowed to play them, only watch let's plays and reviews by clickbait journalists.

I have bad news
you're already in hell and it's all downhill from here

Square Enix' Tomb Raider games

Conquest Earth

Hyper Blade

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Sure, but modern "Jews" are not descended from the inhabitants of Israel and Judea.

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The Shroud of Turin is 100$ fake, broseph.

Zelda: Wand of Gamelon cd-i
Superman 64
The Matrix: The Videogame
Aliens: Colonial Marines
E.T. Atari
The new licensed Ghostbusters twin stick shooter.

I'm amazed people still exist who think it's real.
Then again, we are but human.

I thought that was proven to be fake as fuck though?

You would only be allowed to play games with a controller. Even games that don't have controller support.

Please no.

greatshroudofturinfaq.com/

It's real.

Okay then.

Here's your reply.

Now you are getting it.

I'm amazed people can remain so uninformed

Quake with a wii controller. on low batteries

We have been in hell for while now

were already there m8. we might be here a while

This forced meme really needs to die.

You're not funny.
You're not clever.
You sound like an edgy 15 year old.

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Nigga we are in hell wether you like it or not

You sound a sensitive SJW.

Nothing in this world is comparable to sheol/hades or the lake of fire.

Sup tumblr. Odd seeing you so far from your safespace.

Not getting social cues is a sign of autism, by the way.

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(You)

but user, we're already in vidya hell

maybe not, but were getting closer

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100% this. If anything, this is video game heaven. We should all be honored to be living in this age of gaming.

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hes right though. we still get to laugh once in a while at least

The REAL shit games. I don't mean mediocre shit like FO4 or NuDoom, I mean the truly disgusting shovelware of older generations. Reminding fags of what true shit games are. I mean, I just find it funny when people are labeling games that are mostly just boring or dull "WORST GAME EVAR" just because it has some recognized name on it.

Every game classic game gets remade by Betheseda and you are forced to play it.

But the real crime of games like FO4 and nuDoom is shitting on beloved franchises, ruining any chances of ever getting a good game out of those franchises again.

federation force, league, and gone home

Not saying it isn't disappointing, just that I find it perplexing how easily people seem to forget how deep the shithole goes when playing mediocre games that have familiar names on them, regardless of how much it actually has to do with said name.

The problem is not the abundance or shittines of the games but the lowering of standards for what a good game should be

Sure we had our Bubbsy 3Ds, Superman 64s, Cheetamen, and much more back there but there were also plenty of legendary games to tip the scales in the other direction, now we get more and more mediocrity everywhere and it's not showing sings of stop`ping any time soon

We are living in a world where a game not being shit is good enough

I keep shilling vid related whenever i can, because it literally hits every problem within the industry with laser precition
And this shit is 8 years old
8 fucking years and things have only changed for the worst

its either that or the series remain on indefinite hold. you arent really losing anything. besides, even normalfags get tired of things eventually, theyll start to yearn for a more classic game

le epic post friendo

Yeah. Hel is pretty chill compared to here.

that sounds like the real problem is that great games arent being made, not that mediocre to bad games are being made.
this may be another phase in a cycle, as standards are lowered there may be talented people who want to break free of mediocrity.
you could say this era is an opportunity. the bar is lowered so why not get into game dev and use that experience to make something memorable? or will greed and fame overtake you after your first taste of success? its not really of consequence

That's not true though. Both Homeworld and Fallout had a shot at returning to qualified developers but got stolen by cockgobblers.

I disagree. I mean, you're not wrong with saying mediocrity is becoming the norm and anything above it gets high praise, but I've found recent stuff I enjoy quite a bit when I go looking for it. I think the size of the industry has lead to a case where rather than following the trends and listening for big names to pop up like the old days, you gotta look in the vast sea of games for stuff you'll enjoy.

Though I will say the lack of anything that can universally be considered worthy of documentation doesn't exactly help the thought that mediocrity is the norm. We've yet to find the next game to shake the industry to its core. We are overdue for something as big as Doom, SMB, or Ocarina of Time. We need an earth-shattering kind of game.

then why didnt it happen?

Commie scum.

So if i purposely learn to hate every game, I'll have all of them in hell, wew lad, I've finally learn the truth of Holla Forums.

Because shit devs like Bethesda and Gearbox happen to be very, very rich.

Also Jesus was not a jew.
biblebelievers.org.au/jesusjew.htm

No Man's Sky. You have to visit every single planet. Then, you have to do it again. And again, and again…

how does that prove that [video game series] would have continued?
there were 10 years between fallout 2 and 3 compared to the single year between 1 and 2. or do you want to count mediocre, ill recieved spinoffs?
theres a reason they sold the franchise and it isnt because they were doing okay for themselves. they didnt see a future in it

I know what you feel man, searching for good indie titles is like sinking your arms shoulder deep in a bucket of shit just to find a gold coin and sometimes the gold is fake

The thing that really grinds my gears is the fucking tastless normalfags
I get why shit like The Last Of Us gets praise
Dat shit gots top notch presentation, and very well written story and characters, if it was a movie, it would be a 10/10 but it's a game, and the gameplay is utter shit
lame stealth, lame shooting, lame scavenging, lame crafting…
Objectivelly the game is an 8 thanks to presentation and story, if it werent for those it'd be a 6
And i get the (((press))) praises it cus they are noobs who know jack shit about vydia and want to push their agenda tu turn vydia into lame cinematic Bmovie experiences
But normalfags are the true cancer, they just see the pretty graphics of the game and cry a little with the story and allready throw flowers at it, never mind the fact that the gameplay itself is so lame most of them will only play it once
They are nothing but bandwaggon jumping hype chazing mainstream goys, and the indsutry panders to these noobs cus it's easyer to milk shekkels from tastles sheeple

How is that different from real life?

sounds like you understand normalfags arent the problem then. are they supposed to just ignore things they enjoy?
if someone leaves your steak in front of a dog are you going to get upset with the dog for eating it or the person who gave him the steak?

Hell, I've even found a couple of bigger budgeted games I've ended up falling for, just by stepping out of my comfy zone a bit.

I honestly feel for this earth-shattering game to happen, we need something with a big budget that can give the decent presentation and shit like that so the normalfags are appeased while not skimping on gameplay. I know it sounds like a unicorn kind of game, but honestly, I think its the only kind of thing that will break the industry in two like OG Doom or Final Fantasy VII did.

Abrahamic religions are all cancer
I have never met any other deity who demonises every single other religion as well as demonizing the serpent that bestowed the fruit of wisdom upon mankind releasing them from their submisive ignorance towards a god that wanted to keep them as mindles sheeps in his backyard

Go ahead and follow your sheppard goy, he will only fatten you until you are ready for the slaugther house

It's not that they give a steak to a dog, it's more like they give dog food to people and expect us to enjoy because dogs like it

I hate this fad. When will the term meme die out? It's so fucking gay.

He shared his powers and such with Adam and Eve, Eve fucked it up even though God warned them. They had the ultimate freedom aside from the warning to not trust the Serpent.

I'm not even religious though. The fact remains that Jesus was not a Jew. Spreading disinformation is the work of the kikes and I think we both agree that kikes are the worst.

Meme is a normal term.

Yeah, a normalfag term.

sure, but thats still not the dogs fault. the dog would just as happily eat a steak. youre on the right track though, but its of little consequence if we enjoy the dog food because theyre selling more in the end.

Read the The Selfish Gene, it's a good book about memes.

Dogs on the very least can be trained
Feed them with good steak long enough and they will wont enjoy dog food anymore
normalfags are more like pigs who voraciously devour everything you put in front of them with out regard for it's quality

kys

Read better, kike.

if you could convince them the things they are enjoying are degrading in quality they would be upset. anyways, the point of an analogy is to get an idea across, not necessarily to prove anything.
theyre still just creatures who are enjoying whats being provided to them, much as we would be "if" we were still the target.
sure, if they woulrt sighted to point fingers at a seperate audience just for existing and being more desirable consumers.
its almost jealousy at that point

If you shitpost righteously you get to post eternal memes on Heaven's imageboard while faggots and christfags have their asses burned forever with eternal butthurt from looking at your holy posts

The first Diablo comes to my mind. It's been years since I played it so I don't remember if you really go to hell or just inside some cave with lava and demons everywhere, but the idea of traveling deeper and deeper underground until you reach the gates of hell really captures your imagination. A simple yet brilliant game.

You people sicken me
I can't even call most of you D&C shills like OP since it's more likely you're all just retarded

I dunno, but what do you do to help get over a boyfriend?

Pic not related anymore

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It's both jealosy and hatred
This island we call Vydia was once a beautyfull paradice, and normalfags turned it into a cheap resort

That's pretty much how i feel regarding normalfags

i love games with that deep underground atmosphere. i remember wondering just when id hit the bottom in terraria. then demons started attacking.
coming from minecraft that was kind of mindblowing, for a game about digging it sure doesnt go deep enough, especially when it implies it in the damn title.

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In hell, there isn't any kind of pvp gameplay anymore. Fighting against other humans can make a mediocre game… well, less mediocre. At least then there's some amount of challenge.

cuk cuk

gone home

and these

Diablo1&2
HELL (level) HELL (difficulty)