Alright you asswipe, listen up. It's not too late, and there is redemption and hope for this woman yet. Repair your marriage first - but you first have to stop taking so many black cocks up the ass.
One of the best things you possibly can do is to kill these things with kindness. Appeasement isn't an option, and with people like this, the only thing that can possibly save them is a sense of tragedy. But the first thing you need to do is man the fuck up and stop being such a colossal faggot.
RECOGNIZE YOUR OWN GODDAMN PROBLEMS
Remember, she's a woman, your adversary and the idiot you decided to knock up. What you first need to do is mitigay damages. The fact that your woman is dangling divorce papers in front of you every ten seconds - because you keep bringing it up - is a sure sign that you're being psychologically cowed and abused.
This is inherently not a good situation for you and especially not your children. Now, what needs to happen from here on out is that you must go on her. This isn't appeasement, you have to, I repeat, HAVE to establish a healthy dominance in your household.
You know how your woman thinks - it requires some serious aikido, but repairing a creature like this requires YOU to stop being such a colossal faggot and letting her walk all over you using YOUR OWN FREAKING PROGENY AS A MEATSHIELD.
JUST. STOP.
I'm sorry that you found yourself in a sorry situation like this one, but you must, you MUST understand that a shitlib like her will NEVER cowtow to any mansplaining thing like "Logic" or "Reason."
You have to appeal to her using her own emotions against her to make her submit. It's a VERY long process, and judging from your posting here, you will probably give up. In fact, you can do this over the course of six to nine months, IF you are dedicated. You have to let her know that you want to make this work, but not bowing at her feet every three minutes is the wrong way to keep a relationship together.
Marriage counselors are shit for the most part, unless you can find a non-pozzed one, preferably Christian one because they have a little extra to reinforce keeping a marriage together.
Find some extra material to do help this - there's plenty of heartwarming tales to assist bringing a marriage back under control all over the internet. Use them for reference, but if you DON'T follow ANY of the advice in this thread, just be prepared for Tyrone to turn you into Cuck Almighty.