Tfw you're a retard

Times in games you went full DSP?
Mine would be Nar Shaada in Jedi Outcast, I was lost for an hour or so.

Deus Ex on the first time you visit Hong Kong, on the heliport

I got stuck there for a full day, explored all the corners trying to find codes for the last security door to unlock the hangar, tried multiple times to pile up chairs and small metal boxes so I could access the room through the air ducts

Turns out I needed to destroy the locker doors and found a PDA with the keyring

First time playing Morrowind, I struggled with any directions the tribals gave me. But on my way to the cave of the incarnates I got lost and accidentally met Dagoth Ur. He basically called me a retard, and I had to look up where the cave was

There's a ton of small ones that I can't remember. The most recent I can recall is that I didn't know how to spawn into a squad vehicle in Planetside 2. I was at BR 60-ish at the time, so I had at least 100 hours in the game.

A friend wanted me to play GTA San Andreas while he watches - he kept yelling at me about shit and then told be I was being DSP tier and that he's never seen someone be this bad at the game. So I guess it's GTA for me, no idea why.

Kinect Super Heroes.

Fuck this game. I never rage but I raged, I raged so hard I almost smashed the Xbox, my brother stopped me and I walked into the other room and punched a literal hole in the wall all because

THIS FUCKING RIGHTEOUS NIGGER WOULDN'T FOLLOW MY FUCKING HAND

Freedom Planet
Silent Assassin 2

Never because i'm not stupid enough to be DSP

First time playing yokai watch 3, i got challenged by "Miss Terry" at the end of a quest with a chance of friending her and declined the battle
I came back to where she was like 20 levels later and she disappeared forever

I once spent several days trying to figure out how to return Eldin Bridge to its rightful place.

I occasionally completely overthink puzzles, the worst case being the opening one for VLR. I skipped the correct answer because it seemed too obvious and read way too far into the clues

Fuck those vague-ass directions though. I remember mistaking some random stone spires for Airan's teeth and going the wrong way too. That and the fucking star you can only see at certain times.

Well, that is the essence of being DSP.

In every Zelda game I play there are always like 2-3 parts where I get stuck at obvious shit and feel retarded after figuring it out. Although I'm conflicted, after playing the OOT Forest Temple for the first time recently (I've played other 3D Zeldas and finally getting to OOT, have to say it's kind of a disappointment after playing later entries, like the incredible Majora's Mask or even Wind Waker and Twilight Princess). You have to retwist the twisty hall after previously untwisting it by shooting and shutting an "eye" switch. Now, can I really be blamed for not thinking to shoot the closed eye to open it back up, if every other fucking eye stays shut permanently? It felt really unclear and unfair, like instead of shutting the eye, it could just blink, which would logically tell me that it can be shot again to undo the hallway.

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Well when I was 8…
>Somehow, I got over and the power at my house shits itself and lost all that progress
After that point, I read every tutorial message like I'm studying for a fucking final.

That's really good game design

Took me a few hours to figure out how to get the kokiri sword in ocarina of time

let me guess you're one of those people who drive poorly in GTA?

This level just fucked my shit up as a kid, I think I just used console commands to noclip my way around until I found where I was supposed to go.

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'sup

When I was a kid I got stuck in the ghost forest of "Tomba! 2", not understanding the puzzle to open the door at the end of the level, forever dropping the game. I still regret not going back to the game and finishing it, because it was an awesome game.

Dark Souls 2, I completely missed the alternate path where the jew backstabber bitch turns the walls around until I had all three other lord souls. I completely missed chapter 2 of the game and skipped straight to 3 and 4.

More recently, coming back to Xenoblade Chronicles X after not playing it for more than six months and I didn't remember how anything fucking worked and I had to look up a wiki on how to get my skell back after losing it in battle and shit like that.

I mean, you're meant to have the freedom to kill the Lords in any order you want. Its not really the "2nd chapter".

Yeah I know, but there's definitely a difficulty curve and I straight up ignored the slope and climbed the cliff. The Iron Keep was pretty cool but very boring as a result.

That first house\dojo thats burning, i circled around for almost 20 minutes without knowing how to get out because i thought the game was super hardcore and i had to do some out of the box platforming on the broken stuff.


Just had to open a fucking door.

In Dark Souls when you get to Anor Londo.

I did not see that you had to walk on that path to get into the broken window.

I spent a good thirty minutes looking around, then I just assumed I missed a key item and starting to head back.

oh, I remember that part.

AM2R where I couldn't figure out where to go. Turns out there's a jump I could make now that I got the hi-jump boots.
To be fair though. You don't utilize the hi-jump very often(I mostly just wall jump to greater heights) so can you really blame me for forgetting?

In Paper Mario: TTYD I found the idea of running away from battle disgusting and shameful. As a result, it took me forever to get yoshi and move out of the minor league.

Oh and that shitty new Wolfestein

I was playing without the hud and sometimes you can only proceed after you kill everybody and interact with something , later on the game the "interactive stuff" got more and more retarded and obtuse so i had to play with the fucking hud because otherwise i would never figure out that trash.

That one almost had me. Figuring it out was incredible.

Same. Fuck running away from battles in turn based games.

My contribution is replaying Indigo Prophecy with friends for laughs, and fucking up part of the kid flashback. I forgot there was a hole in the second fence, so I kept trying to sneak past the guard when the truck drove by. I hate stealth sections in non-stealth games.

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When I played The Void I couldn't figure out how to paint for a good three hours.
Then after that it took me about five days to figure out how to write the Donor glyph correctly.

in fallout 3 i got stuck for an hour during that bit where you have to get into a city by calling an intercom

Super Smash for the Wii U.
Oh wait, game sucked dick since its launch.

Is that Josh Moon?

How do you even play The Void?
The game is so fucking complex.

I rented Deus Ex for the PS2 from Blockbuster. I put all my points into swimming, couldn't figure out what I was supposed to do, then returned it within an hour.

I know EXACTLY what you're talking about and the same thing happened to me

Literally worthless. I'm a permavirgin neet leech on society and I can't even fucking play video games. There are so many times where I got lost or died repeatedly and couldn't solve the simplest puzzles.. the puzzles especially make me feel like some sub-80 IQ retard, which I probably am, fuck me
There is no genre I'm good at, just some genres I'm even worse at than others
someone should put me out of my misery

I swear my brother and I as little kids almost got there by jumping on it and timing it right. I don't think I knew you could manually steer it until I was an adult, because I was always tails and my brother pushed it through, probably fucking with me by not telling me he wasn't just doing it by jumping.

I actually made it through by jumping on it with great timing.

At least you didn't get hit by that horrible save glitch.

I legitimately suck at dark souls worse than dsp. I never even got to the parts dsp got to.

But at the same time i hate artificial difficulty games in general, and i am good at 3d action platformers, i play dmc just normally. I just happened to hate that timing reading you need to do in dark souls games all the time and hope you'll hit shit and dodge like a monkey.

The entire game is just time and resource management.

You faggots are lying through your fucking teeth if you even dare say that you knew what to do when you came up to this barrel.

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If it makes you feel better DSP massively overlevels.
For example the average endgame character level in dark souls games is 60-70
DSP leveled up to almost level 200 in DS2


oh wait you're just retarded

I got stuck on the bridge with the dragon in Dark Souls for almost a week. I had played Demon's first, and so I sat there and waited for it to move away. When it didn't, I assumed it was a sign I wasn't supposed to go through yet, or that it was just a bonus treasure area like the one with two dragons in Boletaria.

I spent ages just wandering about thinking what I was supposed to do to get it to move, or get around it, and it turned out you actually are supposed to just fucking run straight at it and go down the stairs. I still don't get why they designed it so that you actually had run at the thing staring straight at you that almost certainly killed you the first time it landed. It feels so backwards.

I had no idea I had to EQUIP the rings in Demon's Souls. Yeah, it was pretty retarded.

I am worse than retarded. I had to use cheat engine in all souls games.

Fuck that level. Biggest cocktease ever. I don't think I ever beat it, I just skipped it with cheats because it pissed me off so much.

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When I was a kid, I couldn't get the timing down to break the church door in Super Mario RPG. After an hour I gave up and assumed there was another route I was missing. Eventually I deleted my file and started over. Then I got there and did it again. Then I quit the game. Went back to it as a teenager and breezed through it.

kys

I can actually add something about both those games.

I don't like change.

Went through it more recently, I remembered the vent but not it's placement, but this time I actually was able to read the map.

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probably fighting games, even against the PC i struggle on the hardest difficulty

Ni no Kuni: Wrath of the White Witch for PS3. I overthought the puzzle sections when the answer was much more simpler. I took 20 minutes to do something that should have taken less than 5 or even 1 minute. I guess my perceptions were warped because I was playing Layton at the time with the game and my thought process required for each game got tangled.

Fuck this puzzle, I'd rather melt every rifle in my inventory than solve it. I still don't get how it works.

That's a puzzle of hanoi, mate. Older than fucking time.

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Never heard of it.

It's basically the oldest and most used puzzle for non-puzzle games. It's in Tomb-raider, Assassins creed, Mass effect and Far cry to name a few well known examples. It's basically the go-to solution for when the designers want players to feel like they're actually solving something in a non-shooty way. Like hacking a computer or something.

Go back to primary school.

hey fellow Holla Forums memers I hate anything good aswell a-am I kewl yet guys!

kill yourself

The Witcher 3 is a very good game but there's no denying that the combat is absolute arse.

Like a fucking hour I wasted on this shit

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Getting stuck on the Marathon trilogy without resorting to the map. Same goes for Doom. Thankfully I learned to regularly check the map when I started playing Wolf 3d.

Here we go again

demon's souls. probably because i was still playing world of warcraft at the time, so i already had an outlet for my unholy grinding addiction, but i just couldn't force myself to continue jumping into the serial procession of meatgrinders of which that game consists.

hey fellow Holla Forums memers I hate anything good aswell a-am I kewl yet guys!

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This entire fucking game.

Fuck off, Reddit.

I've figured out the barrel within half a minute as a child, I've beat Hotline Miami 2 hard mode with a trackpad, beat advance campaign, and beat DoomRL while blackout drunk, but that's not smug.

Let me tell you about smug. Smug is guessing that since varsword and the guts punch chips have button inputs, maybe other chips too, and going through most of the navi chips in the game and button and control pad mashing them during the attacks to see what works. So, I'm reading this let's play by this guy who's really good at battle network, and he's talking about all these inputs for chips, how they're hidden all over the anime and magazines and shit, and the last fucking one is the beastman input he uses to beat Bass BS almost instantly, and, sure, that thing he did with bowlman is cool and all, but he's smugging it all up talking about this new trick and I'm just here pretending like I'm on a Cal Arts show mugging an aside to the fucking camera.

And I still let Dart die during the final battle in FE7. Sorry pirate man, you were the best at hitting shit.

I recognize that porno.

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Holy shit are you me. I was playing it for the first time today, got stuck on that same exact part, explored the entire level for fucking hours. Kept trying to see if I could get to it from the vents but I couldn't jump high enough. I even reloaded the game a few times to make sure it wasn't bugged or I didn't break my save file.

But nope, just looping the level one more time. Found the key out in bumfuck plain sight and proceeded in to Hong Kong.

Then I came to Holla Forums to post about it in this thread and holy shit I see your post.

Man I was dumb as a teenager. That might be part of being a teenager though.

The fucking city levels in doom 2
good fucking god i'm absolute trash for taking like 30 minutes to find my way in those

Witcher 3 is by far the best combat in recent years, faggot. Go back to Nigger Souls.

Scientific method, faggot, it's human instinct. When a kid especially is when you just sit there pressing every button until something happens.
Only teenagers and older start getting "stuck" in places because they rely more on their assumptions and experience rather than raw experimentation.

Most recent?

Borderlands Pre-Sequel getting stuck on those damn shoot the latches on the door at the start because I was looking for something to activate, not to shoot

And NuDoom same problem, the room you get the BFG in you have to shoot those glowing power things, but they're white instead of red so I thought they were just background design and not something you could actually shoot

The biggest example was when I played Majora's Mask the first time. I got stuck in the Forest when you needed to get to Deku Palace, but the large Octorocks were blocking the waterway. I kept thinking that you would need to kill them before you would be able to do the boat ride.

Turns out you kill them [b]with[/b] the boats in the boat ride. I was stuck on that for a good week before I looked it up.

I used to full-on bang on my desk and throw my headphones around in a fit of autistic rage when I died in FPS games.I would go through 2-3 sets of headphones a year because of it.The headphones I have literally fell apart on my head, and I didn't even abuse them at all, now I have to re-tape them every day or they'll continue to fall apart.I can't afford to buy new headphones at the moment.

Wow I fucked up that boldtext. Now I feel really autistic.

CANCER

Fuck off back to your shitty thread, autismo.

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Without a doubt, my initial playthrough of this game is the most retarded I have ever been in a video game.

dks2 enemy attack tracking

DOUBLE NIGGER

Not really things I did in games, but my game choices:


I posted this in the NWN thread but: