Grove street, home, at least it was before I fucked everythang up

Yeah yeah yeah yeah it is

What's this?! Shit looks ridiculous. No respect for the hood, all clean and shit!

I'll have two numbah nines, a numbah nine lorge, a numbah six wit extrah dip, a numbah seven, two numbah forty-fivez, one wit cheeze, an a lorge soda.

Respect gotta be earned, Sweet. Just like money.

Daily reminder that CJ was a successful businessman, got contacts with the FBI, is friend with the triad's boss and is the biggest mother fucker arround and yet he get confined to his shitty street because his brother is an ignorant nigger who can't see his brother success.

And the nigger ate it all too!

Which brings to mind another quote that made me laugh because I was young and easily amused

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IIIIIIIIIIIINNNN WEST PHILADELPHIA, BORN AND RAISED

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was CJ raped in prison?

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Depends on the sort of stats you left on him.

the first 3 3D GTA games are bad games and your all wrong if you disagree with that statement because it's not opinion it's fact.

GTA IV is great trought

Does the pope shit in the woods?

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Was Grand Theft Auto San Andreas the best dindu simulator?

Return to the forum about poo my man

At last I truly see, user.

True but I don't think the plan depended on him being such a fat fuck that he eats all of that in five minutes and doesn't even leave some soda for me.

I can shit on you from such a height, you'll think God himself took a crap on you

Until you got to the part where they drop you in the middle of the woods yeah because after that the game gets crazy.

I have yet to complete this fucking game because redneck mountain was such a fucking chore to get through I never managed to do so. Just how fucking much am I missing

Once you get to Vegas the game gets fucking nuts from stealing jets off an aircraft carrier to reenacting oceans eleven to breaking into area 51 because a hippie told you to.

Just dew it. It gets better after that.

What are you guys talking about?
He doesn't really get cucked, does he?

THIS

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On the contrary, he fucks several women and doesn't call them back.

Well, the first girlfriend you get was banging a house full of mexicans when you meet her, so…

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hey it not CJ's fault that Catalina is fucking crazy, never put your dick in crazy user

This is why Claude is the best protag of all the games. He doesn't have to speak a single word to steal your bitch.

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I mean come on, CJ put his dick in crazy and she cucked him for Claude.

Claude moved to Liberty City with crazy and she decided to break up with him in the middle of a bank robbery via pic related his shit up.

She's the kind of crazy that you don't know she's crazy until it's too late.

Claude is a giant cunt, he backstabbed the Yakuza without even a second thought. Sure, Kenji was a cunt, but killing him was a massive bitch move.

It was just business, Claude did whatever he had to do to get back to Catalina. Also he was given orders by the game's version of Donald Trump so it's alright.

Trump wouldn't do a man like that.

HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

But would trump eat a man?

It wasn't until I recently re-watched some of the scenes from SA and GTA3 that I've come to realize that Claude was a massive autist with some cucked behavior. Catalina was incredibly ugly and I have no idea what kind of retard would ever want to fuck that abomination or be that Yeti's bitch.

Eating a man would mean penis too

shes an individual of the hispanic persuasion

is your last name paznokaitis?

Who else failed to properly land a flying car while he was saying this?

GROVE STREET IS THE PATREON
LOGO

HOLY SHIT
b is a backwards d

Nope. b is a b

Makes sense, no matter how much money or you put into it, it's still the same shithole it will always be.

Guys, guys, where is the post box? I have to keep going to the top of the page, what's going on?

Reload the page.

Catalina rapes CJ, he doesn't stick his dick on crazy willingly.

Carl Schwarzenegger

someone never touched a GTA game

she becomes a top tier waifu for him though
>loyal as far as the game shows, but she was probably a prostitute before cj meets her

this is how GS looks with a bunch of fixes and graphical improvements

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Did you seriously enter a GTA thread and expect no BRs?

I just realized that the voice acting in San Andreas is pretty fucking good

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Why can't they have custom models also have mouth flaps. Its not like the ps2 models where that advance. Its probably like 4 bones at most, or is that the issue?

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GTA Underground allows you to travel seamlessly between VC, LC, SA, and Bullworth Academy.
There are some other standouts referenced, such as Carcer City and Atlanta, but they are so early in development it's almost not worth mentioning.

You should check it out.

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Ay! Excuso me, José. Yo soy El Grando Smokio, and I want that grass. Comprende?

HOLMES

Holy shit man, that's amazing, it looks exactly the same and I can't see no difference whatsoever!

GTA V may have the best map, but GTA SA will always have the best story and characters

the 2 earlier ones arent comparisons by the way. i might take more later if needed but i have to go soon

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the ones where i pilot a police helicopter are the game fixed/improved like i said, hunter ones are stock. all of the screenshots are with 8x supersampling forced and 1920x1080 is my monitor's resolution, 1680x1050 is the game's resolution cap that can be removed with mods. the hunter screenshots have a hunter stuck in my garage because when i first used the cheat it spawned inside a wall. have more for good measure

Ayy

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except its baller territory now and the house you go to in the mission is a drug den which was cj's house.

stop nigga it hurts

a decade and i never thought of that

TLaD best game.

It's a crime what they did to Johnny, just killing him off to show how angry and edgy trevor is.

Yeah that was fucking ridiculous.

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shes a fucking chicana nigger they all cray cray

that moment probably sums up V for me, it went from IVs ridiculous but still somehow grounded and satirical setting to pure

trevor may have been inevitable but goddamn Nico was almost shakespearian compared to the shlock we get in V, i didnt give a fuck about anyone in V, whereas nico was a very relatable, even sympathetic character despite his deeds

my favorite moment in IV is when the irish lass dies, you are driving somewhere, and nico lets out a howl of rage at the shit on the radio and turns it off.

there was not one single moment in V anywhere close to that, and IV had a few of them, even SA did

fuck the new gta, its like youtoob culture personified, and it has little to no redeeming qualities tonally(gameplay and physics were dumbed down as well, far as i can tell

You know what would be cool?

If on the next GTA the main charcater was a cop OPERATOR as fuck and his goal was to capture all the previous GTA scumbags dead or alive

Nico was great for a GTA protag, he just let everything wash off him until something really bad happened. A perfect player self-insert for a GTA game.

Same fam, just gave it a few good tries and it went like clockwork.
They were annoying and way too long, but you could kill them by jumping onto the train from that jump.

Your pic is gay though dude, Kenny was an American hero.

I remember playing what was the last mission and thinking "wait…that's it?"

GTA games used to build up to an intense climax (gta finally getting revenge on catalina, vice city killing sonny and lance, san andreas killing smoke and tenpenny, iv getting revenge on the russian mafia guy and the mafia don guy)

ZEY SAY BEAUTY IS SKIN DEEP, BUT WHAT ABOUT THE ENERGY?

I HAVE INFLICTED A LOT OF PAIN IN MY TIME AND SOME OF IT WAS REALLY BOOTIFUL

YOU ARE NAZIN DO WHAT I SAY

AWW YOU WANT POTATO? YOU A LESS THAN A POTATO, LESS, LESS.

Commercials in GTA games are legendary

Fuck no. If anything, it protrays the Dindu perspective on life, with zero reality to any of the situation, at all.

You're just some thug, trying to clean the hood up, and the po lease are tryan some muhfuggen shiet on yo bois cuz uncle tom.

Story's pretty shit, because of that.

except for the donut store/lesbian sex one that seemed to LAST AAAAAAAAAAAGES only to make the same sex joke over and over. I change channels when that shit started

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Is there a character in fiction that has been more meta-fucked by bad writing?

He gets cucked, three of his sexual contacts are confirmed used goods and he throws away all his money to be a nigger gangbanger because of his brother.

I bought SA on steam is there any way to make it the unjewed version again? i aint playin it unless it's the way it was on release.

Just pirate it you wanna-be nigger

pirate the xbox version

What joyous fucking perspective, you have.

In reality, Niko is one of the most casual-appealing, PC, and bitchy protags in the whole series. A goddamned Slav fresh off the boat who doesn't bat an eye at Kebab, and he's a fucking Serb. If it were released today, this site would have a field day picking the intro apart, alone.

Yeah, no shit. James Woods was the best thing about it. Peter Fonda too.

4U!

There's plenty of downgrade patches available to use.

bustas

thanks homes

Xbox was better version you nigger

At least explain why instead of just slinging insults around.

Xbox version has that RC bug where you lose fuel without doing anything. Same for PS2

Better framerate, more vehicles and pedastrians, better draw distance. I dont see why anyone would prefer the ps2 version

i can't remember a single line of dialogue from san andreas aside from the memes but i still recalle james woods. "alright I gotta get outta here, I'm too hip"

Why does no one get the quote right? It's like Luke I am your father at this point

because people like you fall for it and take the bait

We're talking about the PC version.

It's more likely they haven't actually played the game. If that mission is as hard as retards say it is(it isn't hard at all, I got through it on my first try), then they'd have the quote burned into their brain. You'd only get it wrong if you if you were just regurgitating le follow train meme

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You can unfuck it easily by downgrading the game and installing bugfix mods. When most people talk about how the PC version is fucked, it's because of the patches that removed music and shit, but if you use the original version, then there's nothing to worry about (except bugs, which is why I metioned bugfix mods).

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The PS2 version was actually better coded, and had better lighting than the pc version and the xbox version. the only change from the iphone version was the hd models.

...

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i havent looked into it but apparently they ported the game again to PC and it's on sale on the win10 store
Also, the iphone/android version not only includes higher resolution assets with lossless compression and smaller file sizes it also includes bugfixes and higher quality graphical effects, in short the phone version is the best of all but it doesn't support all the PC mods

I still love the lighting and weather effects on ps2.
some of the cutscenes you can see heatwave.

there's PC mods for that friendo, you can also just copypaste the ps2 version's files related to that but it's glitchy as fuck

Dude i played the game, i was just baiting.
Besides the game has a lot of nigger talk, one cannot remind it all.

so thanks to this thread i'm revisting the game and
gta 5 has worse vehicle physics than san andreas, specially when you're in aircraft

GROOOVE STREAT, HAWM, AT LEAST IT WUZ BEFO I FAWKED ERYTHANG AWP.

We're all real impressed kid.

It's an infamous mission not because it's hard but because it's bullshit. You're dependant on the AI's ability to aim which isn't helped by the fact the game doesn't give you any idea as to what angle the AI needs to be from the target to get a clear shot. Your success tends to be more luck than skill unless you've found precisely where you need to drive.

The reason so many people get the quote wrong is that generally people aren't so autistic that they look a quote up in order to get the exact wording right.

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The AI is 100% consistent, you have to angle him right or he will shoot the train instead of the people on top. Its always the same angle, retards just expect bullets curve

A long time ago, I found a guide or something that gave decent instructions on which version on PC to install and how to fix everything, but I deleted the install a long time ago for some reason and I have absolutely no recollection of what where that guide was. Anyone have any idea where I can find it or something similar?

Now that you ask i have a version of the game with mods that i gathered and the sole puporse is improving graphical fidelity/fixing bugs. i can zip that with a readme file and upload it then send it to the share thread but some settings are tuned pretty high and if you have a potato pc it might still slow you down, i also have 192KB/s of upload speed so it will take a while

I'd rather install everything myself.

well basically you start off with silent's asi loader, install the latest cleo4 and the latest modloader. then you install these mods (you'll have to use google):

more
This is what i call "san andreas but works", I have it saved and packaged into a DVD and i use it as a base version for the game

Might be fun, I'm a lazy fucking fuck

What did they do to it?

every time i try to remember a san andreas phrases it comes down to bitch ass nigga motherfucker

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pic related

I DON'T NEED
A WHOLE LOTS OF MONEY

That's a lot of parches, can you upload everything somewhere?

uploading it. 50% and i left my computer on all day (shit upload).

What did they do to the steam version?

Removed the music because the licenses had expired

25% left

Thanks

okay so my power just dropped and I have to do it from the start

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WE

re upload pls

it says 10 hours left

That MOTHERFUCKING burn and lap on gold. Don't even get me started with city slicking with the PS2's draw distance.

So the last time i turned GTA SA on the PC it turns out the mouse doesn't work, anyone have the fix for that?

hahahahaha
another slavaboo not knowing what the fuck he's saying.
diaspora in the west don't give a shit about each other, we just want to get paid.

download dinput8.dll and paste it into the game's folder

I can wait forever

big smoke isnt even black, hes jewish

ITS MY CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT, bitch

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How would CJ respond if he knew Catalina was in there?

"I got five guys watchin' me, two over there, one by that hill, and two by satellite." - Mike Toreno

"I knew that bitch was crazy.. But not this crazy!"

And if TF2 was released today you guys would call it SJW pandering crap.

And if you were here today i'd call you a faggot faggot

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:(

bump

That just made him look jewish.

I'd rather play as a nigger than a kike.

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Dammit, wrong file.

Nobody needed to be a nigger to have a blast with san andreas, but for some reason we need to have the option to play as a transgender pregnant dykes and have character gender pronoun options or else "people can't identify with the character" and won't want to play.

Just another example of SJWs being the real racists and sexists.

People can identify with characters who aren't even human.
It's really just to get brownie points and to push the agenda.

Now that it's been a year Holla Forums

What is better Modding wise, IV or V?

or is it still SA?

Also what should I play, good ole SA, or should I try and trudge through the retard slavshit of IV's story or bear through the normalfag tier writing of V for the physics engine?

ANONYMOUS DELIVERS
i didnt actually make a readme

San Andreas But Works.7z 3.41 GB
mega.nz/#!bVUVRCBb!v06eofIpUu4DqF2EELhLtGdlIMYjhph2O_Q0X_Iq8_g

gta 4 has better physics than V, in fact vehicle physics in san andreas are better than V specially for bikes and aircraft

I DONT NEED A BIG FINE CAR

Cheers user.

The only problem is that what do I do? There's 3 exes, the game crashes when you try to rebind keys and theres tons of other shit as well.

yeah that's why i was going to make a readme. anyway just use gta_sa.exe it's the compact cracked exe, i put in the alternate crack one that's 14MB~ for compatibility as it's the older hoodlum crack that crashes less with some mods but the compact one doesn't cause any issues with the mods i put in, the crash when rebinding is an issue with the asi loader and recent versions of windows (either disable mods by going to scripts/global.ini and disabling loadplugins or have an unmmoded version of the game available). do tell what tons of other shit you found

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no homie big smoke is a straight busta that nigga ruined da hood

gta_sa.exe crashes on startup until i disable asi scripts, so I used the old crack. The game would crash often (loading game, exiting game), the game would also switch frame limiter back on in tutorial cutscenes and thats just about it there might be some more things I missed but it's probably nothing. But other than that it just werks.

weird i dont have any of that. are you running the game on compatibility mode? You should run it on win98 compatibility unless the world loads slowly on which case you run the game on winxp service pack 2 compatibility mode, don't forget to run it as an admin.

you're on win10 aren't you? using load game more than once and exiting the game is supposed to crash the game on win10 and with the asi loader on

Nah I'm using Wangblows 8.1, gonna try compatability mode and admin.

always run san andreas in compatibility mode, it fixes a lot of random issues and crashes. win98 is the best but like i said it may cause the world to load slowly (i.e if you drive your car for too long eventually the world won't appear in time).
i was wrong then but my point still remains, the newer your version of windows the more issues you'll have with this game

Ok i will try out win98 compatability, but what about the frame limiter issues?

disabling the frame limiter messes with some of the game's aspects (sped up timer makes it impossible to beat schools, CJ swims at a snail's pace, vehicle physics change a bit, AI has issues spawning on the right location). you'll have to deal with it and disable/enable the limiter when you need it

So I tried out Win98 compatability, but some mods weren't working like the headtracking one, should i use WinXP compatability or what?

I GOT EVERYTHING THAT A MAN COULD WANT

So I used the fps mod and this happens to CJ. What?

what the fuck is this limited bandwith shit

this give you any idea how edgy i am

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Which is the better multiplayer mod? SA:MP or Multi Theft Auto?

MTA. There's even ped scripts for it.

in all honesty I actualy enjoyed the lost and damned more than I did BOGT.

I still don't understand why they killed them off the way they did, or even brought johnny and all of them back.

MTA but sa:mp actually has servers and players

see if it's disabled on the modloader options