Last time on KnightQuest: You finally reached the mountain, where your dragon waifu resides, with the help of your good friend Gumpy, who tragically exploded as you arrived. Climbing up the mountain, you rest in a cave, only to be hit over the head and be tied up by Gobbin, the troll that lives there. Upon telling him you were only there to get some booty, he promptly lets you go. Eventually, you are blocked by a wooden structure, which you realise is a harpy nest after you burn it down. Kiki, the harpy that lived there, agreed to fly you to the summit if you help her find a new home, not realising that you were the one that burnt it down in the first place.
You're finally here, just steps away from claiming your prize - dragon ass. Some may say you're a hero, some may say you're a madman. Most would probably say you're a rude asshole with violent tendancies and a penchant for bestiality.
Available Commands: MAP - Check Map INVENTORY - Check Inventory
James Baker
Bump?
Angel Walker
Wipe those tears off your face, then tell that lovely harpy you need…a few hours in the cave, then you'll be happy to find her a new home..probably
Wyatt Nguyen
You tell Kiki you're gonna need a bit, so she needs to wait outside.
"Wait! Wait! Is this my house? I want to see! I want to see!" she squeals "It doesn't look like a house?" Kiki scratches her head.
Angel Lewis
Being a knight, we should have some chloroform on hand…. But if we don't, suddenly point behind her saying, "Here is your home!" When her back is turned push her off the edge (she'll be fine) make a dash inside, and tell her you'll see her later. She will be so amazed at your ingenuity she will happily wait for you. It's not like she has a home to go to.
Landon Torres
The edge of the clifface is a bit far away, so you simply turn her around, point far, far into the distance and tell her that if she looks hard enough she'll be able to see her home.
While her back is turned, you walk to the cave's entrance. This is it, this is what you've journeyed so far for. Now it is time to decide, will you persue your love for it, or slay the dragon for rejecting you. This tempestuous love swelling withing you, it yearns to be free! It yearns to-
Jason Peterson
"Wrong cave, buddy." the Knight says "You want the one over there." He points to another entrance slightly to your right. How embarrasing, you'd gotten quite worked up too.
"Huh, looks like you're not a unique freak" the Dragon says.
Cooper Perez
Ah, this is the right one. Where were you? Something, something, something, fuck or kill. Something, something, love, something.
Leo Parker
Get ready to pound that dragon ass, be sure to lube up before hand.
Lincoln Ward
If the dragon rejects you, Kiki seems like she's a good option, Harpies usually have a good ass.
Isaiah Garcia
just stab the fucker in the eyes while screaming
Mason Thomas
Stab the fucker in the eyes with your penis while screaming, so the last thing it sees is a penis hurtling at it's face
Anthony Hernandez
You're lubed up and ready to pound. Seven coats to be sure!
But the dragon is REALLY tall, so you can't reach. Now you're lubed, you're too slippery to climb up and pound the ass OR stab the eyes.
William Jones
Wait until the dragon lifts its tail, and start going in the ass
Julian Peterson
The dragon lifts its tail to reach for something. Looks like a salt shaker. Now you have even less stuff to climb up.
Nice view though.
Kayden Allen
Ask Kiki to fly you into the dragon's ass, besides, who doesn't like a threesome?
Grayson Peterson
Stop trying to fuck the dragon YOU FUCKING FURRY SACK OF LITERAL GARBAGE
Say means things to it.
Adam Richardson
That's our goal you fucking idiotic faggot.
Cameron Lee
I recognize that duo
Owen Ross
That's not my goal, however. Mine is for the thing to die
Wyatt Ross
Probably because it's a reference to another work with a knight trying to fuck a dragon;)
Jackson Ortiz
You're still a little conflicted about your feelings regarding the dragon, you you call Kiki in from outside to help you figure out whether to fly into its inner guttyworks for pleasure or maybe stab it. She appears to comprehend the situation prefecty, much to her dismay.
Gabriel Scott
Prepare to infiltrate the dragon, and pleasure it.
Robert Gray
You grab ahold of Kiki and instruct her to fly up its butt. "I-I don't like that home." she murmers. You let her go, kind of confused. Looks like all you've managed to do is tar and feather yourself. Well, lube and feather.
Logan Nguyen
Give Kiki a hug, tell her we're sorry and we'll probably fuck her later or something. We must head to the dragon ourselves, try to find an easier way to the dragon's ass.
Robert Anderson
Get a running start then use the lube to slide up the dragon's back, so you can stab it in the face
Sebastian Morgan
You pat Kiki on the head and tell her you're sorry and you'll make it up to her, with a wink. Obviously she can't see you wink through your helmet, so she probably didn't get it.
You begin running, the lube reducing your friction, allowing you to run at a high speed! Oh shit, the lube is too slippery! You're slipping! And you're heading towards a cupboard! And you think you might have left the stove on!
You should do something!
Christian Allen
Take off your armor for higher speed (helmet can stay tho) You won't need it for where you're going
Nathaniel Reed
Get an IQ test, because clearly we're fucking mentally retarded.
Jack Lewis
Jump and then continue sliderunning up the cupboard, then backflip off the cupboard into the dragons face.
Parker Roberts
You have armor! Brace for impact! Or try to get inside the cupboard.
William Young
Yes! An excellent time to practice your parkour and acrobatics skills! Position your body to perform an incredible feat of agility.
You remember you are not very agile and 'decide' to get inside the cupboard instead.
You ask the terrified inhabitant if it thinks you're stupid for entering its home in such a way, or if it was a mistake anyone could have made.
It doesn't respond.
Hudson Gray
Squeeze through and explore the cupboard.
Jose Baker
Enlist the inhabitant(s) of the cupboard to help you free the cupboard and all of the food stuffs from the tyrannical rule of the dragon
David Morris
You squeeze rhrough the small hole you made in the cupboard door, which scrapes off all the lube and feathers. You introduce yourself and explain why you're here. The creature introduces itself as "K'tyr, a-at your ervice." Oh great, another sidequest.
"I-I couldn't help n-noticing that you put a hole in m-my home." it stammers "It's no longer safe for me here! I-I must leave a-and you must h-help me!"
Sorry, Holla Forums started eating my posts for some reason Either way, now's a good time to pause, so KQ will return Saturday at 10pm. However, it'll have to be slightly shorter, my work shift got moved to sunday and I can't get out of it.
Gabriel Cook
IT KEEPS HAPPENING
Levi Adams
...
Tyler Bell
guy
this isn't fucking video games
>>>/quests/
Justin Taylor
But it very clearly is a PC game.
Benjamin Robinson
Alright guys, let's get going. I only have about 4 hours from now, so let's make them count!
Jonathan Lee
Or I guess not posting anything is also an option… I gotta get some sleep, so if nothing is posted in the next 30 mins, KQ is off for tonight.
Jose Ross
Alright, well fair enough then. I suppouse a lot of you are busy watching the finale of SGDQ anyway. Can't blame you, FF6 is a great game. That's all for this week. KnightQuest will return at 10pm GMT next friday!