If Max Payne were a CIA agent his name would be Max Bayne?

If Max Payne was chatting in The Wired, his screen name would be Max Layne.

If Max Payne hurt himself he'd be Max Payne

If Max Payne were water his name would be Max Rayne

If Max Payne were a nigger, his name would be Jax Dwayne

If Max Payne crashed with no survivors, his name would be Max Playne.

If Max Payne were in the WWE, his name would be Max Kane.

If Max Payne was from Dennmark his name would be Max Dane.

If Max Payne was a bird, he'd be Max Crayne

or

If Max Payne was a machine used in construction, he'd be Max Crayne.

If Max Payne was the love interest of Tarzan, his name would be Max Jayne.

...

If Max Payne was bad at E.Y.E Divine Cybermancy, his name would be Max Sprayne.

His name would be Max Pardo

It's been what? 15years since the first game and im still salty as fuck how they made 2 into generic Hollywood garbage though even that's better than Shitstars iteration in HueHue-land

If Max Payne liked looking in a mirror all day he'd be Max Vain

If Max Payne liked Superman he'd be Max Layne

IT WOULD BE EXTREMELY PAYNEFUL

Lain?

If Max Payne wrote his game he'd be Max Layke

If Max Payne broke his weightlifting PR, he'd be Max Strayne.

In our headlights, staring, bleak, beer cans, deer's eyes

If Max Payne was from Europe he would be Max Spayne

If Max Payne were dead he would be Max Slayne

If Max Payne was /fit/, his name would be Max Gaynes.

If Max Payne was a farmer, he would harvest Max Grayne.

If Mr. Clean had an enemy, it would be Max Stayne

If Max Payne were a pacifist, his name would be Min Payne

If Max Payne were a videogame character he would be Fon Tayne