These people just continue to bitch and moan about everything. If gaming to you is about "having fun" then why do you spend so much time bitching and crying?
This article is obviously about defending Polygon about their shit gameplay of DOOM.
What a fucking bitch. I bet he has failed at every turn in his life. He then turned to video games thinking he would finally have something to be good at and failed being good at those too.
The only thing he does well is being a bitch.
William Williams
I kind of hate how much Holla Forums is turning into /n/
Mason Watson
he's right, you don't need to be good at video games to enjoy them
but you need to be good at video games for anyone to take your opinion on games seriously. being good at a game doesn't necessarily mean having better twitch reflexes than the other guy, or memorizing combos, it means you have a basic understanding of how a game works.anyone who plays lots of video games can probably figure out the basics of a game within 5 minutes of picking it up just from other experiences. the same experience lets you see past cliches you see in AAA games, and you can tell where the divide between player input and "cinematic" moments merge in the wrong ways
most journos are casuals and don't have that skillset, and are easily impressed by any old shit. so they should git fucking gud if they don't want to keep getting ragged on in the comment sections
Camden Edwards
I never got this phrase. How can it be rape if you're asking for it?
Julian Sullivan
Improving in your flaws is bad
Fuck this dude
Fuck these people Git Gud or fuck off my lawn.
Jaxson Reyes
So uh
What are some good games that require little to no skill?
Jason Martin
This toxic games journalism culture needs to end.
Cameron Davis
Yes. I don't expect them to be experts but I expect them to be competent, considering they work in gaming as some sort of "professional" level.
I would also say it's not fair to the game developers to have useless noobs showcasing and criticising their game. In that Polygon video I would have guessed DOOM was going to be some broken clunky piece of shit but then when NVIDIA played it I was blown away and how badass it looked.
Leo Hernandez
where is that autistic stone poster these days ? the hurrr durrr fix v
i miss him
Dylan Gonzalez
If it was as bad as /n/ we would have something like the crab spam, the one faggot who spams cumskin to bait new Holla Forums users, and just shitflinging about trump. It barely has any news that feels like it's worth going there for.
Jordan Morris
This corrosive board complain culture needs to stop.
Aiden Jenkins
So you don't love baiting newfag Holla Forumsacks who overreact to everything?.
Mason Miller
Did you ever notice that their staff count continues to dwindle? When they make articles like this, gamers patronize them less and less. They're doing their best to try and steer the narrative into a direction where they can once again be considered relevant and sway the masses to their point of view. It's not working.
Don't fucking worry about it. They don't have the money to keep going for much longer.
Logan White
This uncontrolled baiting culture must be stopped.
Brody Edwards
You're inherently gonna enjoy something you succeed at more than something you fail at.
Camden Anderson
Enjoying culture must end.
Samuel Nelson
Ending culture must end.
Grayson Torres
Just play video games you fucks. Who cares what comes out of the mouths of these cucks. You say these sjws assume every game is like rapeplay But if you'd play your favorite video games you'd know they can't touch the gameplay Who cares about the thoughts of one John Walker? He's just a twat who hates Myst. A great big joker. Why engrave his name in your mind? When you can enjoy games like Trine but not the third one because that sucks So stop taking names till you're done playing games
Adam Rivera
You must end.
Jason Long
Completion must end.
Blake Cruz
Social Darwinism in action!
Ayden Evans
No. I enjoy games when I'm winning about 1/2 to 1/3 of the time.
What the fuck?
Caleb Hughes
Hipsters must end!
Jose Harris
This acidic replying culture has to stop!
Juan White
...
Bentley Sanders
Replying must stop!
Thomas Powell
Time has to stop!
Jacob Murphy
This fucking thread needs to die.
Samuel Smith
Ben, pls go.
Yeah and I bet you have difficulty understanding why some people think Sonic's arms are blue.
Landon Phillips
...
Oliver Mitchell
This is the sort of person that loves the smell of his own farts. Which would explain why his head's so far up his own ass.
Nathan Lewis
news at 11
Lincoln Turner
You're only partially correct. You need to gitgud at video games because being good at something means excelling in the task of what that something is. If you are poor at something then your capacity of succeeding in that something is limited, including the ability to enjoy things. Being good at games means being able to enjoy a broader range of games AND being able to enjoy a game thoroughly - all that game offers - AND being able to self-impose challenges and accomplish feats that push beyond the design boundaries of the game.
Quite literally the last thing you would want to wish for is to be poor at games because that limits your ability to do virtually everything in gaming. If the goal is to enjoy gaming in some capacity then that faggot succeeds but like all dishonest frauds he's covering up the big picture; that he and his pathetic excuses of colleagues are utterly ill-equipped, incompetent, and regressive low-energy failures and their ability to perform in their jobs is drastically hindered by their incapable inability to play games even adequately. Above all their ideology, it's no wonder they celebrate walking simulators and casual trash because those things pose no challenge - not to them and not anybody. They would sooner see gaming limited to nothing but that; so it would make their jobs easier, but more importantly so that their egos remain unthreatened and their incompetence remains unexposed.
Fuck them. Gitgud is sacred.
Jayden Wright
...
Josiah Jenkins
This smelly fart culture needs to be stopped.
Hunter Ramirez
What's up with the fags on this board complaining about videogame news? Isn't everyone here because games journalism shat in their pool and ruined 4chan? Even after getting fucked by them you can't even be mad about them fucking you more. Better believe stupid shit like the article in question will "inspire" game devs to make games easier, and it will be because some fuckhead journo who's never touched a controller or thinks AWSD are keys for typing can't land a god damn body shot in a SHOOTING GAME.
Ayden Green
fuck you all my news now how do you like those beans?
Nathan Brown
...
Camden Powell
Those are all edits, right…?
Owen Nelson
...
Landon Nelson
You should know
Isaiah Brown
THE RIDE NEVER ENDS
Lucas Ross
Translated: The only credential for reviewing video games is a degree in creative writing.
Landon Martin
Done.
Lincoln Reed
Forgot two. Now done.
Justin Richardson
There should be a game where out of 5 Kotaku reviews, you have to guess which one is the true one, with the 4 others being fake
Because I sure as fuck can't tell anymore
Angel Allen
Those integers need to be checked
Xavier Baker
That's why I asked… I still can't tell.
Cooper King
The Kotaku ones are all fake.
Oliver Murphy
One isn't, can you guess which?
Josiah Thompson
The one about how "exclusivity means more sales?"
Asher Ross
user… two are real.
Jason Turner
That's bullshit. My girlfriend thought she was having a heart attack a few months ago because she knew the female symptoms. Turned out she just had low blood sugar.
Austin Carter
...
Bentley Morales
History must cease.
Luis Harris
I refuse to believe people think heart attacks are different between genders. How retarded are people?
Cooper Watson
...
Camden Kelly
Meant to link to this one
Thomas Long
If I had the choice I'd've been gay, but it's too late now.
Don't forget: gender is a social construct and only difference between men and women is in social conditioning.
Daniel Moore
MS. and MR. writer must be really disappointed with their parenting skills, also if you look at the full thing that nigger tried to kill a health pack several times and didn't land a shot
what?
grand strat, that sort of stuff. it doesn't necessarily require coordination with a mouse and keyboard, retards still can't play them though
Ethan Moore
wait, with enough social conditioning we can rid humans of heart attacks? Why the fuck are we acting like this is a bad thing?
Austin Barnes
It's never too late. Start with traps, move your way to twinks, then next think you know you'll be longing for that lumberjack-bear cock up your ass.
Levi Bennett
The biggest problem I have with these shitty "journalists" is that you can't even know which ones are real and which ones are fake.
Just like you can't notice the difference between a troll and an actual SJW on twitter or tumblr, since they're all bloody crazy.
Lucas Ortiz
A trans "lesbian" I think.
Benjamin Adams
2nd one is so very wrong, Holla Forums's is actually surprisingly accurate
Wyatt Johnson
I already fap to traps
But that's not gay :^)
Aiden Sanders
Liking things that are shaped like girls is the most gay you can ever contract.
Christopher Gonzalez
You can't fool yourself.
Sebastian Lopez
:^)
Caleb Diaz
I wish it was true because thats [b]hot[/b] as fuck
Easton Baker
No, no it's not. What the fuck is wrong with you?
Jaxson Morales
Where the fuck are you from? Go back there.
Sebastian Morgan
Leave.
That aside, it is real. Not many porn vids, but it is real.
Jason Smith
Yes it is, whats wrong with you?
Isaac Reed
but all the sites that give number reviews are paid review sites. and Holla Forums does collectively like a lot of games, especially ones that were good enough to be remembered longer than 10/10 GOTY review spam.
Ian Rogers
This defeats the purpose of getting an impression of the game before actually investing combinations of money, time, bandwidth.
Nicholas Wright
this shit is allowed on youtube? im reporting it
Grayson Long
I find it disgusting too, but we have to accept that we live in a world where fat people are allowed to be on youtube.
Ian Moore
...
Lincoln Bell
The entire point of a review is so that you don't actually have to use the product to find out if its good or bad.
Thomas Lee
The second law of sexualdynamics states that degeneracy either increases or remains constant.
William Johnson
But what do you do when reviews are shit? You pirate the game and review it yourself.
Jackson Ortiz
Not quite. The point of a review is to know if the game is a good or a bad product so you'll know if you should spend your money on it or avoid it. And of course reviews are supposed to be about subjectivity.
But instead everyone recognizes that game reviews are all about who paid ENOUGH to get a good score. Anyone have that one screenshot of the guy who was describing how a developer buying him a $100 dinner made him feel pressured to give the game a perfect score?
Isaac Ortiz
...
Matthew Wood
Not play the game obviously, and play something else. Even when pirating it's still investing time and bandwidth.
And no, to reviewing it myself either. I'm not interested in reviewing and neither do I have the audience or viewership for it either.
Levi Mitchell
Not a specific review of a game, but when reviews as a whole, their quality, is shit.
Nolan Cruz
Change it on the second sentence to a plural equivalent.
Jayden Gomez
...
Hunter Rivera
This is the one where Death becomes a farmer and leaves a nu Death in charge who fugs things up isnt it
Joshua Stewart
Pretty much.
Bentley Johnson
...
Aaron Ortiz
No that's Mort and he went fishing in that
Evan Edwards
Source, please.
Brandon Jenkins
The more I read this, the more pretentious it is. I assume that comes from /lit/ and that whole fucking spiel makes me realize how shit tier Pratchett was. I liked The Fifth Elephant, but now I don't want to go back and re-read it for fear that I'll run into something that smacks of SJW.
Ayden Thomas
Probably Okami.
Leo Barnes
user this is a shitpost from 8/v/
Asher Carter
Jesus christ.
Caleb Davis
user did you read the whole thing
Asher Cruz
It must sure suck having datacaps.
Christian Reed
it's a pretty good joke, user
it's okay to laugh
Anthony Cruz
I figured as much, I'll scour through shitty porn for a bit then.
David King
No I didn't. I couldn't.
Oliver Hill
Sort of. Death has what amounts to a mid-life crisis and abandons the Job to become a farmer. In response new forms of Death (like the Death of Rats) arise to deal with all the things that just don't move on without him. The climax involves a new form of Death that hasn't been humanised by eons of contact with people.
The B-plot is Windle Poons, the Mall, and Reg Shoe (Undead yes! Unperson no!).
Mort was similar, but that was more of an apprentice thing. In that one Death went to work at Harga's House of Ribs.
Joshua Miller
finish reading it then you baka
Evan Bennett
Read the whole thing, you retarded cocksucker.
Joseph Turner
You're a master of negotiation, you know that? Retard.
Fine.
Ryder Harris
Shitters who don't really like games are bad at games? Big surprise
Jacob Campbell
None of us like games, doesn't mean we're bad at them.
Ian Ward
It's a drawing by Kame of a character from one of Kishibe's SFW doujins.
OH, MY GOD, YOU DENSE FUCK, HE'S MAKING FUN OF THE JOURNOS BY PRETENDING NOT TO KNOW HOW TO READ. IT'S LIKE BEING A LITERARY CRITIC WITHOUT KNOWING THE FIRST THING ABOUT LANGUAGE. THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT OF THE POST.
Aiden Hall
Come the fuck on, user.
Chase Smith
Woohoo! I think it's worth .. $0.01. Do I win?
Tyler Russell
humanity has declined
Ryan Cook
Well I'm not surprised, just irritated at these faggots constantly wanting the bar lowered until even a fucking vegetable can roll over it.
Liam Torres
My only response to that would be
GIT GUD PUSSY FAGGOT
Joshua Kelly
Ebitorial: N Nd Ta “WRIGHT GUD” – Yue Din’t Nid Te Bae “Goot” Ad Writting Aboot Gaams Too Andjoy Wreeting Abet Dem Bae Jean Wilker an Mae 38th, 1016 ad 4:20 am
Hunter Morris
Why live?
Lucas Long
...
Ayden Perez
Well no fucking kidding, considering Samus is a girl.
Mason Lee
...
Daniel Baker
i'm a virgin and i know that isn't true mainly because i'm a medic
rub a cunt enough and shit comes out yo
Josiah Anderson
...
Xavier Brooks
yeah but they didn't. they gave her feather pubes and the ability to roll into a ball
Jacob Young
Can you futafags just kill yourselves already ?
Parker Martin
...
Ayden Nguyen
A woman's not going to be cumming INSIDE OF YOU. Are you stupid?
Benjamin Garcia
Tl;DR: I'm a woman who can't into competitiveness.
She is complaining about people being mean to other people for sucking at games. Well woop-de-fucking-doo, that's how it has always been. Does it mean that you should take every mean comment you find to heart? I will quote what a wise man once said;
"Hahahahahahahaha How The Fuck Is Cyber Bullying Real Hahahaha Nigga Just Walk Away From The Screen Like Nigga Close Your Eyes Haha"
What I don't understand is why this bitch doesn't want to accept that playing games for the challenge and playing games for fun can exist at the same time. If someone is telling you that you suck, it shouldn't stop you from enjoying your game. Sure it can be demoralizing, but what are you gonna do? Some fuckwad will ALWAYS think he can do something better than you. This isn't something only "gamers" do.
Wan't proof of a person sucking, yet still being somewhat popular and staying afloat? DSP.
At least at the end of this unnecessarily long and whiny article she comes to resolve that she will ignore any "mean" comments from now on. Good. Dealing with your problems is good, telling people to stop acting like they have and always will is just idiotic. As long as there are 13-year-olds playing video games, that's not going to stop. Good luck with that.
Chase Barnes
Well, might as well be since he's such a pussy.
Cameron Bell
I've seen kindergarten kids who can read better than this
Benjamin Scott
how the hell's a pussy going to penetrate someone. You can't put holes and holes
Kayden Carter
...
Isaiah Parker
I just don't know anymore
Hunter Mitchell
That's pretty hot
Adrian Taylor
Holla Forums:
Please. This isn't even about video games. It's just some faggot who can't play video games, whining about how he can't play video games. 10 years ago, no one would have cared about this shit. Jesus fuck, man. I can't even begin to comprehend why this should be as big of a deal as it is.
Fuck all of these "game journalists". I wish I held a position of power in the gaming industry so I could tell these talentless faggots to eat shit.
Grayson Jenkins
Oh shit, she was actually a he? Without looking up a name, his writing seriously sounds like someone who is menstruating. That's fucking hilarious.
Landon Thompson
This is just fucking gross. Everything about it, especially them and the way they talk.
Ryder Myers
Read the five characters before "I'm a woman".
Jose Murphy
Typical leftist thinking
Austin Rodriguez
10 years ago we weren't full of normalfag getting in our hobby because le quirky nerd culture BAZINGA XDDDD. Even videogames magazine were a cancer,not everyone,but enough to make people don't trust them.Demo were a thing so you could see the game before buying it,and with internet you could exchange opinions with every Holla Forumsirgin around. But now they made videogame a mass media of propaganda,normalfags don't listen to us who were here before them,they listen fucking pretentious faggots who don't play nor like videogame,casuals on neofag,women,and publishers.
We care because the media went to shit thanks to those motherfucking mongrels,which allow publishers to do the fuck they want,enabling the continuous shift in shit of videogame like early access,DLC everywhere,"cinematic experience",Gone Homo,and a nigger on Battlefield in a WW1 set. Game journous are a problem because they move the opinion of the uneducated mass.
Elijah Williams
/n/ is a worthless board because the BO there is in on the cumskin/crab/rach shitposting and actively encourages it. The only way to salvage the board is to kick that faggot out and ban the spamming retards.
Sage for not videogames.
Nolan Ramirez
...
Xavier King
I've become so jaded that I refuse to believe anyone is being authentic until proven otherwise. I think most people do that for journalist but that blanket is encompassing more and ore groups of people, nobody is serious about anything, it's all bullshit garbage spewed from the mouth solely for the purpose of getting attention, money, or both.
I'm filled with disgust.
Lucas Ortiz
/n/ is fine, if you want hot pockets just post on Holla Forums.
99% of the problems are caused by trolls trying to turn it into Soviet moderation so they can whine about being banned for shitting up the board.
Joseph Gonzalez
Perfect.
Has anyone considered doing this slightly more often? Perhaps often enough to put on a website? A website called RockPaperShitposting? A website ran by a man called Ken Buchera?
Jayden Rogers
i.e. Present yourself as a serious literature website and insult the intelligence of any potential serious audience
Ayden Moore
Maybe more devs should release demos instead of being morons
Remember when you could use demo discs to unlock shit in the main game? Or multigame demo discs of upcoming games? What happened?
Jaxson Reyes
Have some more!
Ian Reed
It's real but if you watch any videos; the dildos/toys are actually pretty shit. It's easier to shove a bunch of eggs into yourself by hand instead of trying to squeeze it through some stupid rubber sock.
The toys look well made but they're not functional.
Evan Martinez
So RPS, Kotaku, Polygon, etc. are like book reviewers who are illiterate or auto magazine writers who can't drive?
Dylan Perez
Good god
Jeremiah Powell
Are we being raided?
David Adams
we need an obligatory "are you capable of sapience?" test before letting people in on the internet
Easton Gomez
...
Parker Hernandez
I play games for fun and I'm generally not very good at them. But at least I don't delude myself and try to make money "reviewing" them.
Videogame journalism is a joke and I never took it seriously. A player review on gamefaqs is better than this shit. When did it all go wrong?!
Thomas Clark
All it needs is to through in "Indie" and "Retro" somewhere in that jargon and it would be quintessential dog shit description of a game.
Jonathan Reed
Sounds like it.
It looks like fun. People love talking about things they know absolutely nothing about so why not do it professionally?
Don't tell the normalfags you're only pretending to be retarded and constantly behave like you're an authority on the topic. They will immediately suspect you're retarded but you can't ever admit to it.
Do you think gamejournos live with the perpetual feeling that they're lying to everyone?
Adrian Carter
There's a difference between playing a game without mastering it and webm related.
Not everyone can be good at all games, not everyone has the time and patience to learn all about the mechanics, and there's nothing wrong wit that, you're not writing a doctoral thesis on the game, you're having fun, and so long as you beat the game without turning into DSP you're fine.
The article is clearly written by people that suck at games so bad they require autopilot to complete them.
Andrew Moore
...
Evan Morales
...
Ryder Harris
Going further with the doctoral thesis analogy, these people are demanding to be taken as seriously on the subject as someone who has taken the time and effort to learn about the subject. I have no idea why the fuck people havent told them to get the fuck out and never come back
John Wilson
every time someone sells a roguelike the only valid thing to do is get the actual rogue instead.
imagine you buy a leather jacket, it feels weird and filmsy and the seller says it's leatherlike. Now imagine the leatherlike jacket is infinitely more expensive than a real jacket because you can get rogue for fucking free
Asher Phillips
That's satire, right?
Matthew Russell
The guy has an entire channel of that shit. He has videos complaining about random threads not explaining what an abbreviation they use means. He's just the most petty man in the world is all.
Jonathan Campbell
Nope.
Lucas Collins
Has there ever been a single "let's give the game the exact same title as the original in the series" reboot which hasn't turned out to be shit?
Didn't someone do some digging over on Steam during the Rome 2 launch and discovered that the vast, vast majority of game journalists didn't even play the game for one hour?
I don't think they even care. All they want is to further engage in their narcissism and whore for attention. These people are hacks, they're the bottom of the barrel, even in a profession as devoid of morals and talent as journalism, that lucked out because they were on the job when gaming became a big thing.
Look at RPS. It used to be a place with well written editorials, features, reviews, where they played these niche games that wouldn't get any sort of exposure, and then they went to shit. Virtually all the talent they had is gone and all that is left is a virtue signaling betacuck in charge and that illiterate cunt that likely got the job by sucking dick.
That's the thing, these cunts don't like games, don't like gamers, they hate their jobs and would rather be a "glamorous" Hollywood reporter or script writer.
They have no understanding of the hobby and the only skill they happen to posses is the ability to shamelessly vomit words day in, day out.
Oh no my friend, he's legit. A champion to surpass DSP.
There's a video floating around of him spregging out at the XCOM tutorial and getting stuck for 10+ minutes.
Noah Cooper
I'm not making this up:
They stopped making demos because they were making them lose sales. Pre-order culture is real.
I sometimes feel really weird because all the game marketing and eceleb bullshit goes right past me. Ublock origin is a powerful tool.
Brandon Hall
The moral of this story is that customers don't necessarily want what is best for them.
Bentley Ortiz
They only lose sales because their games are shit and people get to experience it first hand. If they stopped making shit games this wouldn't be a problem, but since they lack the talent to do that Jewing it is.
I wouldn't say that is true. Companies, not just vidya ones, have spent shitloads of money on figuring out what makes people want to hand over their shekels, and now we are seeing the fruits of this researcher.
In the context of vidya, games are turning more and exploitative, and more often than not either feeding a gamer's gambling addiction or actually awakening it.
Hell, I remember reading an article a while back about scientists despairing because banks were using the tests they developed to root out sociopaths to actually hire them, because it turns out they are highly effective at foreclosure since they don't give two shits about people.
Dylan Baker
Pretty appropiate that the article's picture is a spoon for feeding babies.
Adrian Wright
I don't think you get what I meant.
Camden Torres
You don't have to be good at vidya to enjoy it, but if it's your job to tell people what kind of games are good then you'd better know your stuff. It's like if embed related had a website about poetry
Jason Rivera
My instinct says yes, but after looking at my game collection, the only same-named reboot that came close to being decent was Test Drive on the PS2.
Bentley James
this has to fake
Easton Allen
You're saying costumers want shit and that's why they get so much of it. I disagree. People can recognize quality, the problem today is that people are being swept along the hype "culture".
Products are "experiences", the quality doesn't matter, what matters is your subjective experience while consuming it and the signaling you get to engage in when you do. With vidya this boils down to "nerds" and gamer gurrls.
It's why retro pixel shit is so widespread. It's a cheap and easy way to prove your nerd "cred" without actually having to bother with them icky old games.
It's not quite THAT simple. Even if the game is good there will be people who won't like it. Demos deter those people as well.
But, having created a demo with my team for a publisher a few months back, I can tell you that there are technical reasons too. You don't usually do full-on QA, optimization passes etc. until the last 6-10 months so creating a demo before that is unrepresentative of the game (placeholder assets, unoptimized etc.) which is a gigantic factor.
Releasing a demo AFTER that is inane because you are wasting man hours of crunch time so pack up a 20-60m demo, which in and on itself isn't just a matter of a few clicks.
The reason it was done before is simpler games (from a technical standpoint,) smaller budgets and shorter dev time. Doom was made in less than 10 months for example.
Adrian Smith
Apple intentionally gimp devices because they don't want people to fuck around with it.
Nolan Edwards
The only thing I know about this man are the memories of him playing the original metal gear solid, burned into the retard part of my brain.
He's just so god damn awful.
Elijah Clark
Fair enough. Still, piracy statistics show that games that get pirated actually sell more.
This likely only applies to games that aren't AAA and rely on word of mouth to gain traction.
That's true for many a company, but that doesn't matter to the people that buy Apple products, they buy them because they are a fashion statement.
You need to watch his Bloodborne playthrough, it's his magnum opus.
Noah Garcia
I'm pretty sure DSP has made his ineptitude a part of his performance. It's what everyone tunes in to see. Whether this is what he set out to become is another matter.
Ayden Carter
He jacked off on camera recently.
Levi Hall
All my life I have been a loser, a nobody, but I've always had "hey at least I'm great at games and really enjoy them, gaming of all sorts brings out the best in me". At least I'm not these joyless fuckers.
Wyatt Sanchez
I don't think it's an act at all. The man likely has some form of mild retardation, it's the only explanation for such stupidity.
Mason Davis
Yeah, but that's different, that's the final product and the studio didn't spend months and hundreds of thousands of dollars to create a buggy, unfinished demonstration.
We won't see the return of demos unfortunately but this time the biggest reason is not jewing for a change.
Angel Brooks
thats hotter than fuck.
Ian Young
I WILL FOREVER RESPECT GIT GUD
Isaac Scott
Just wanted to add that's actually a decent book.
Wyatt Gomez
I've decided to make a more in depth and ugly list.
John Nguyen
People leave cameras and mics running by accident all the time, and people like to masturbate. It was inevitable that the two would coincide.
I'm not saying it's an act per se, he's surely as bad at games as he looks. Just that if he didn't play it up nobody would bother to watch, because without his whining and tantrums he's just an unremarkable shitty player.
Bentley Allen
...
Nicholas Green
This. I enjoy lots of games that I am shit at. That means my opinion on them is worth less. I love fighting games and RTS, but I suck at them, and you can therefore treat my thoughts on them as worthless. I am really good at racing games and character action games, and therefore I can appreciate, explain, and properly critique the subtle differences between the games the way I can't do for others.
There is nothing wrong with enjoying a game and being bad at it, but the level of authority difference is the same as the difference between "being a medical doctor" and "watching Grey's Anatomy".
Oliver Diaz
brb, killing myself
Zachary Long
Arthur Gies was the guy who played Doom horribly in the video. John Walker is his friend and part of their circle-jerk.
Brody Miller
RIP, user.
Benjamin Davis
...
Julian Miller
Shit comic incoming.
Jason Jenkins
Fuck this person and everything they stand for. I was cucked once and I'm still damaged goods from that.
Christopher Watson
...
Adrian Collins
These libtards always say that racism against white people doesn't exist and the most of these bloggers are white. Has anyone thought of going on racist anti-white rants in the comment sections of these sites to see how much shit they'd be willing to put up with? It would be a great way to get their communities to eat themselves.
Christian Peterson
That just means you're stoopid. Only true intellectuals can appreciate a nigger fucking their woman.
Gabriel Campbell
That comic is much better than mine, oh well, I tried.
Robert Ward
Well, mine wasn't a black guy, so does it still count as cucking?
Cooper Hernandez
This part stands out to me. Not just because their skills are below the level of a regular gamer, but also because they're really not expert writers. Super Bunnyhop is below average skill if you ask me (he was able to beat dark souls, but struggled with The Witness and other things), but he is actually able to make up for it with good analytical skills. These other assholes really aren't, and their reviews show it, missing important details.
First polygon now RPS, but sure journalists don't collude in the industry gaming peasants. Don't worry your serf minds about it, we are entirely impartial.
Aaron Carter
got you covered.
Daniel Peterson
too bad there hasn't been an actual review in about 10 years :^)
Logan Fisher
whups, forgot the pubes.
Bentley Turner
Shadow of the Beast
Splatterhouse 2010
Brody Torres
Did you just start browsing Holla Forums?
Did you forget Patricia the gorilla?
Lincoln Perez
This sexist bird-pubes culture needs to come to an end!
Mason Ward
I ve heard about bird pubes since years ago but never bothered to investigate the reason other than hearing she was raised by birds
Anyone care to explain ?
Owen Kelly
When the chozo adopted samus with some of their genes, i dont remember if it was to save her life or because why the fuck not, she is technically half chozo
Noah Lopez
Next year, 2007 will have been 10 years ago.
John Parker
RPS is cancer and has been for years now. It used to be pretty decent with finding hidden gems. Sad.
Easton Lopez
At age 3-4, Samus was adopted by the Chozo and INSTANTLY had her base genetic code re-written. Part of her genetic coding includes the power suit.
Outside of it, she's stronger and can jump a standing 15 feet, but doesn't "look" any different. The fanbase has therefore determined that she MUST have other genetic issues that aren't talked about.
Such as laying a softball sized egg every month or having feathers sprouting on her body at the onset of puberty.
yes, this means feather armpit hair
It's part of the reason we talk about the stupid "beauty mark" being a pinfeather she plucks.
Ian Myers
POLYGON GAVE IT A 3, user!
Wyatt Sanchez
I wish those were a bit better.
Mason Jenkins
Thanks, shit sounds pretty hot tbh
Tyler Harris
Dear God, we must encourage him to record complete playthroughs.
Ethan Peterson
What is this /v you're talking about?
I've heard of Holla Forums and Holla Forums and it's infamous head mod. I haven't heard of /v yet.
If anything, this editorial brought MS Paint comics back to life. For that, I thank you.
Oliver Turner
Who the fuck is loose cannon and who's the blue spandex guy?
Hunter Gomez
Git Gud is a shit tier meme that helps nobody. It's not advice, it's not criticism, it's a kneejerk response to anyone attacking your sacred cow.
Xavier Campbell
that is such a shitlord answer
Jordan Anderson
(unchecked) You don't deserve those quads.
Jaxon Edwards
you don't deserve those quads you redditor. it's a good meme but has been tainted by your fellow redditors and children who have ignored the basic concept of git gud, which was "get food faggot because you complaining adds nothing to the discussion". but since you can't see that and you're a whiny moral fag, I don't think you can comprehend such deep facts.
Adam Cooper
So what, I kinda like the concept myself.
A more realistic take on Doom? Why not? As long as it's clearly marked as a spin-off.
Dominic Russell
ACTUALLY
It means to not expect the game to baby sit your retarded, lazy, non-strategy considering, rushed, poor resource management, slow reflex, non-practiced
@$$ @ $ $
Isaiah Brooks
Blue spandex guy is one of the supermen. After Doomsday killed Superman, lexcorp and a shitload of imposters showed up. Some were comparable to the original superman.
Loose Cannon is DC's version of the Savage Hulk, growing stronger the madder he gets.
Oh, and he's a guy who's in a wheelchair all his life, so no one would have a clue who he is
Jayden Rogers
GOD FUCKING DAMN IT FUCK POLYGON
Gabriel Gutierrez
Literally because he couldn't figure out that you need to stun the nigger behind you to fight the nigger in front of you. And the puzzles were too hard for him.
archive.is/xmWT8 IF THE STORY ISN'T PLASTERED ALL OVER THE PLACE, IT'S BAD. I AM TERRIBLE SO THE GAME IS BAD. I AM A SILLY LITTLE NIGGER.
Dylan Morris
Son, get off the tap water.
Luke Powell
Okay, I tried making another comic to show how stupid the journalist's argument is.
I hope this one actually works.
Hunter Baker
Your first one is saved, by the way, good job.
Samuel Jones
Y…You've fondled some unconscious girl's snatch, haven't you?
Michael Rogers
At least we don't have crabs, India, and trump posting with the cringeworthy "Cumskins" meme from /shitskintl/
Camden Carter
...
Hunter Rivera
Dude I fucking met that gorilla. Much nicer in person. Likes bananas.
Josiah Harris
FUCKING SCRUBS, THE LOT OF THEM
Joseph Campbell
Here a review for you:
IT'S ALL THERE YOU DELUSIONAL FUCKWIT! PLAY A FUCKING GAME ONCE IN A WHILE
Caleb Young
We didn't care. And it gave them ample time and opportunity to invade the industry and turn it into pure shit. We should've just crushrd them back then, and not wait until they became too influential. Now we fight a fucking uphill battle, and while the top seems to be close at hand, it was a battle that could've been avoided had we reacted sooner.
Alexander Rivera
Fuck is this bullshit, they can't do that. The Supreme court's going to bitch slap them for this.
R…Right, guise?
Jaxon Ward
Black user here, reporting in. The two main examples I can think of of this horseshit being pushed in "urban" communities is Jhene Aiko and that "eat the booty like groceries" meme. Then rapper Kevin Gates gave an interview about eating ass and everybody was talking about it the next day.
It stank (no pun intended) of a forced op and now I see I was right. So do they just sit around a table, giggling like faggots, trying to see what fresh degeneracy they can get the goyim to engage in next?
Carson Clark
I wish all you niggers went back to Africa and stayed there. The world would be a much better place without you, and your Jew enablers, around.
Julian Fisher
Sorry, I think you must have me confused with your fat momma, faggot.
Joshua Edwards
No, no, I can smell the typical negro stench from here. Go back to your jungle, it's where you belong nigger.
Parker Green
I love watching you guys with no free will sperg out, "oh no it's a big jew conspiracy to get me to eat some girl's asshole". Just as funny as the people who think some mysterious communists are out to get them.
Adrian Diaz
...
Anthony Cook
Social engineering is very real user, and very powerful men have done much more pointless things with their tremendous influence and wealth than try to affect cultural changes.
With that in mind it'd be foolish NOT to anticipate some sort of manipulation.
Kayden Rogers
Exactly. Tell your mom to leave the room.
Levi Gonzalez
Yeah ok, Schlomo.
Jaxson Johnson
It's just the invisible hand of the free sexual market, goy.
William Mitchell
Jews, user, it's always the Jews.
I walked in on that one, I freely admit. You're still a nigger though.
I just looked up this game, and one of the first fucking links was to avclub with the headline The Shadow Of The Beast remake is too attached to an overrated original Jesus christ, why the fuck WOULDN'T a remake be attached to the original? I'll never play the game since I ain't buying a PSquadruple but for fucks sake, what is with these fuckers wanting remakes to be completely fucking bastardized and detached from the original IP?
Henry Cruz
Negro, please. Nigger is just a word.
Here, let me help you fit in. Dulcet tones from your native land.
Alexander Cooper
Yeah but I didn't watch it, I closed it immediately. So fuck you, I still kind of win but mostly lose.
Kevin Moore
You didn't even skip a few times to check if the tags were accurate? There's egglaying near the end.
Brandon Brooks
Oh yes you still mostly lost which means I mostly win
Blake Stewart
Fucking why? And no I didn't.
Yeah, fuck you.
Xavier Moore
Nigger is not a word. Nigger is what you are. I'm sorry your momma didn't go to Planned Parenthood to spare you the suffering of being born a nog.
Joshua Garcia
I like how the smug son of a bitch titled the article 'An End To "GIT GUD"' as if he thinks he is an authority that holds so much sway that he can kill an entire mindset by voicing his grievances.
What an arrogant bastard.
Charles Clark
You're still talking? Christ, I didn't even mean to post that. I thought i'd deleted that part, as you're not even worth the response. But whatever, keep saying it if it makes you feel any better.
Joshua Turner
He became Beast and then went fucking nuclear. Wild. Waking up. Inside.
Chase Price
v is dead
Anthony Long
...
Juan Rodriguez
Your mother is dead.
Landon Kelly
...
Lucas Richardson
great, fuck off being alive on reddit
Carter Young
Do those people actually have a journalist license?
Camden Robinson
...
Caleb Lopez
why would they need it, theyre bloggers
Joseph Robinson
fuck I almost forgot how twisted those people and their logic is.
Ryder Edwards
No, actually. Most have never attended a journalist course at all.
Jaxon Brown
Because they are caught in a stupid place of "use an established IP" but "do something new", so the mindset is "bastardize something you know until it doesn't resemble it's former self"
Oh, and the main argument for, say, nuDoom, is "it's JUST like the original!"
They can't even defend it.
Jose Hall
Let's go it a step further, most of them got hired by their friends and never even attended a single Q&A or journalism fair, they've never had anyone tell them what their job is, so they think their job is "just like, write words and shit" and this is why they see no issue with taking dinners or free consoles or other bullshit they should clearly NEVER accept (especially with the amount of money a journalist gets paid, it's not like they're hurting for cash).
Jason Flores
Just off yourself, retard.
Benjamin Jackson
...
Justin Gray
Oh boy, now that's heretical.
Juan Collins
...
Cameron Allen
Triggering, ain't it?
You now gonna demand me to leave your internet safe space like the totally not an SJW you are?
Ryan Barnes
You're a faggot.
Angel Adams
Amongst other things, but at least I am not dumb enough to think that the bullshit in our society is intentionally organized by some singular shadow faction.
Adam Hughes
Get the fuck out for being a faggot, I don't care about a safe space, I just don't want you to be a faggot. You massive fucking cock hole, your mother is embarrassed every time she has to talk to you, because then she has to remember what a failure she created and can't uncreate.
Grayson Perry
Considering this game nearly follows the story of the original to a T
>Aarbron becomes human, finds his old lady mother and his baby sister >he turns into a "half beast" and goes NUCLEAR >puts some shit together because sorcerers as powerful as Zelek and Maletoth can't be killed by normal means >the sorcerer makes a ring for Aarbron that shoots fucking fireballs >Aarbron vaporizes the asshat and is finally free of The Shadow of the Beast
Ian Young
You don't believe in conspiracies whatsoever? You seriously think all of the ill in the world is pure coincidence? You're horribly naive on top of being a furfag, please go.
Fuck man, that is pretty nice to care for random Anons like that. You are a nice guy.
Anthony Rodriguez
Sure it's not one shadowy organization, but it's a bit silly to deny the media influence of a certain group especially when you consider who owns companies like Viacom.
Robert Williams
Nigga, even back in WW2 2% of the jewish population in Germany owned about 50% of all the food industries and retailers. That's why Hitler wanted them gone because the kikes where raising prices and fucking up the economy while fucking up the food supplies.
Why would they not own and infect the media? Cute how naive you are, but you'll always find the kikes fucking shit up while they do opposite in Israel.
Nathan Murphy
Nah, user. The naive thing is to think that people are coherent and smart enough to pull some global operations that sway the momentum of humanity in some specific direction. No, that garbage belongs in superhero cartoons. The real cause is incompetence and short-sighted selfishness.
Normal people follow one thing: status quo. Politicians bury issues because it's easier to delude yourself and the nation to think that the problem doesn't exist. Media companies follow the same direction because they want no trouble. Boat-shakers are frowned upon. There is no other cause behind it. Just a very specific kind of laziness.
Zachary Morgan
CITIZEN SNIPS
Benjamin Davis
I want these people to be gassed
Dylan Ortiz
Really now?
Adrian Bailey
I was going to post a ironic comment about how "everything bad happens only everyone is retarded expect me" but you did it unironically.
Absolute madman.
Andrew Gonzalez
So is Doom any good, or did we determine 100% that it's shit? Cause I don't mind not giving money to Todd.
Adrian Adams
user.
If you don't think that the world is becoming more and more subversive, you need to get your head out of your ass. It may not be jews, but it sure as hell is something.
Charles Hughes
You have some proof that they were raising prices for the hell of it? You have some proof that they were doing it due to some coherent agenda and not out of common business-sense?
There is a difference between analyzing shit and actually organizing projects that would take thousands of people around the world influencing tens of thousands of people and not even once letting out some amount of credible evidence of the great agenda's existence.
It's not the worst ever, but it's pretty useless.
Ryan Rivera
Every major conflict involving the western world is orchestrated by the military-industrial complex for its own ends
Socjus and Identity Politics are a form of virus that has infected the left from inside and is slowly causing it to shutdown
Luis Miller
Darkseid can easily defeat Superman 1on1
Captain Marvel and the Flash can/have defeat Superman
The Martian Manhunter could defeat Superman
Justin Edwards
Corruption, but it's not NWO-stuff. Conspiratards think it's some carefully planned masterplan, but it's really just the big biz cracking down on elements that harm their profit minmaxing. And guess what allowed it to go through? All these stupid fucking morons in Europe voting for the Right-wing parties that openly suck big biz dick. "a-at least they ain't faggot-lovin' commies, bro :^)"
Because common people are fucking stupid and the really dumb ones get obsessed about radical ideologies that easy memefy.
Because people want perception of stability. Newspapers pander to people's needs.
Cameron Stewart
Is it wrong that I want to fuck Allie?
Ryan Ward
Oh my fuck, can you imagine a world where this is the average QA participant? Can you imagine? If this was actually true?
Gabriel Lopez
Not NWO, you say. How's limiting free speech, modifying the food you eat, making the medicine you buy impossible to purchase, amongst other black-marker stuff like businesses able to sue entire countries sound? The fact that it is being dealt behind closed doors and people only got wind of due to leaks is really fucking suspicious.
So, what, you're saying that being concerned about SJW mentality is wrong? It's right that people are losing their jobs over subjective and contextual comments and at worst, being fined and jailed for it? If you can't see this insanity for what it is and what effect it could have on the future, you are beyond hope. Whatever indoctrination they have instilled in you has worked.
Go to any online forums and you can find heaps of angry comments from every sort of person about immigrants. If anything, media silence is making the people angrier. I know enough not to fall in with these neo-nazis, but I sure as fuck know enough not to trust some fucker who has spent all his life in the middle of death and violence.
Jeremiah Peterson
...
Bentley Reed
I'm going through his other videos and I think he might just have literal autism.
Jaxson Perry
nope. John Walker was always a nogames insufferable english major intellectualista barista faggot.
No, I remember QA getting lost in HL2 Episode 2 for hours. What happened with Casual Thief's QA?
Nicholas Hill
fuck that guy so much that antlion cave would have been amazing as a maze. but fuck VALVE more for designing games for the people that don't finish them
Brayden Cruz
...
Hudson Rogers
They didn't go upstairs because a guard told them they couldn't go upstairs.
Logan Walker
What's wrong with well adjusted, cultured and progressive go- individuals?
Bentley Carter
This is so fucking disgusting. Why do you guys know who this fat dike is? Does she do videogame stuff or something? It wouldn't surprise me since all these new "gamers" seem to be worried about almost everything more than videogames.
Jordan Ramirez
It's like videogames are a jewish scale to see how good the goyim are.
Isaiah Johnson
This is retarded, I'm entitled now because I can't expect a video game reviewer to be good at games?
Hahahaha, well what do you expect from leftist egalitarians but "You don't actually need skill at something to understand and appreciate that something." Of course you need skill at games to properly appreciate and understand them.
Also, who plays games for "enjoyment" other than babies? I play games for a challenge, which is mostly why I play older games now, because new shit is babbymode easy.
Asher Anderson
Hahahahaha, oh wow, so valuing skill and accomplishment is narrow-minded, accept and celebrate everything and everyone no matter how bad they are, we're all equal…. ugh, I fucking utterly despise hippie-think.
Anthony Campbell
I can't wait for Holla Forums to go full Holla Forums so it's all WWII and Crusader-era games.
Justin Morales
Agreed.
I'd say having a basic understanding of the various systems that make up the game and how they operate mechanically in gameplay is the bare minimum necessary to be able to offer informed, valid opinions and criticisms of a game.
Josiah Gonzalez
Grand Stategy, really any strategy genres require high level planning and conditional/contingent thinking: you have to be able to make somewhat elaborate plans, manage resources, and be able to adapt your plans in response to changing conditions in-game. If you don't understand the basic mechanics and systems that make up the game, you'll never be able to formulate or execute a winning strategy. And these nu-gamers and gaming journalists lack the levels of meta-cognition and awareness necessary to formulate long-term strategies even within a very controlled simulated digital environment where you can easily discover the workings of the mechanics with a bit of simple online research, and that's why they're all failures in games and failures in life.
Isaac Bailey
No, the point of reviews is you're a mindless plebeian who cant or won't form your own opinions, so you have to defer to "professional" opinion-havers to tell you what to feel about product X.
Jayden Evans
People being better than other people at things is pretty toxic when your worldview states that everyone is equal, I mean it's living proof that the ideology you subscribe to is BS, so of course they're very hostile towards those who have gotten good.
Josiah Garcia
Next up, you don't need a tongue to be a food critic, and, so what if I'm blind, I can still critique this cinematography.
Juan Sanchez
Please, no, our board already has too many dumbasses on it.
Eli Torres
I never liked DOOM, I remember the first time I saw someone play it, some dork on a laptop way back in the mid to late 90s in study hall. I didn't like FPS then and still don't like 'em now almost two decades later.
Ayden Robinson
No, that requires self-awareness which these faggots clearly do not possess or they'd be working real jobs instead of being social parasites for a living.
William Morris
It's called nepotism and cronyism and its rife in the Jew-dominated publishing, journalism and entertainment industries. These little faggy shit reviewers are related to someone or are friends with someone who is related to someone who puts the money in these publications or they're considered good little ideological soldiers who won't question, they'll follow their orders and write crap articles to push their leftism into vidya culture.
Luis Bennett
Why the hell do I want some regular jackass who thinks he writes well telling me about their experience playing a game? That's what Holla Forums is for. I want people who are somewhat expert on game design telling me why a game is a worthwhile purchase from a technical standpoint, not some literal whore telling me SPEND LOTS OF MONEY ON THIS THING I HAD FUN PLAYING BECAUSE I WAS PAID TO HAVE FUN PLAYING IT.
Joshua Jones
That's what you tell yourself to feel superior to others, but in fact, there are agendas at work that created the mess we have today so as to weaken national sovereignties and roll out one world governance and one world currency. People with power want to have a totally controlled and predictable world and are going all out to achieve it. Dismissig it as conspiracy theory and the result of incompetence and stupidity only serves to make you feel superior while simultaneously letting your guard down and making you more vulnerable to it.
Politician create issues and problems and publicize them relentlessly to try and gt the public to agree to "solutions" to these engineered issues. Politicians don't hide issues and problems.
Daniel Walker
All it takes is a few people placed in news agencies, and the CIA has had agents embedded in media companies since the 40s.