I've attempted suicide twice. Most recently in April. Both of my parents are dead and the only family member I have alive is my older brother. I think I know now that I can kill myself without any worry whenever he dies. I'll have no one to make upset by taking my own life at that point. I have like 2 friends that I hang out with once a month if that. My brothers girlfriend also cares about me but I'm not her actual family so I'm sure she'll cry but wouldn't be devastated as if it were her own son or anything. I'll get drunk one last time that day, and either hang or shoot myself. Then I'll be free. No more consciousness after that. No more social isolation. No more crying. Heartbreak, anxiety, disassociation, taking pills every day. It'll all be gone and I'll be at peace. I just have to hold off until after my brother dies. Thoughts?
I've attempted suicide twice. Most recently in April...
if you're really going to go through with it and aren't just somebody who is in need of help - study your method and make sure you don't fuck up and leave yourself injured/impaired to a point where you may have to live a life of disability afterwards
If you already loathing life that much, you might as well explore and have adventure before you go.
Become a black magician. Invoke spirits to aide you.
Then report to Holla Forums on your findings.
You might get possessed but fuck it.
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nice blog
better than any thread you started today tbh
your gay tbh
Hang in there OP. People care about you even if you don't know them or haven't met them.
Being dead sounds so appealing though. I know nobody knows what happens after death but I'm pretty sure it's unconsciousness. Permanent unconsciousness. That sounds so peaceful to me.
lolis saves lives, too bad you are kiked up like a good goy so you are better off killing yourself
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Holla Forums is random tbh
Yeah you're right I guess fucking a prepubescent girl would make me not want to kill myself anymore. Good point man
Killing yourself is cowardly.
Don't go that way.
anime
It may be cowardly but who gives a fuck when all your family's dead? Why struggle on needlessly?
I know how you feel OP. I've been trapped being alive for my entire suicidal life (since 12)
I'll never be able to kill myself and somehow that can actually feel worse than wanting to kill myself.
Would you rather end your own life and have 0 chance of getting your shit fixed and being happy, or go to a psychologist or something and get fixnshit
this is a christian thread, no porn
There's no fixing some problems
gib example
nonnude tbh
Some people are just born or set by their social upbringing to be different or eccentric and never being able to form intimate relationships with their peers or with girls. I also have an anxiety problem that occurs at around 8pm every night when I'm spending time with my family that drives me to go to bed. It's so ambiguous of a problem that no psychologist could fix it
At least a psychologist could evaluate you in a professional manner, see if you can or cannot be fixed for sure. Unless you've done that already. Even at that, he could find a person that is more specialized in the ailment that you have.
Hey OP, life's shit, and I'm planning to off myself before I'm 30. But I'm living life until then. I'm studying an ideology, I'm trying a bunch of drugs, and I'm just taking in everything while I can. Stay a while longer my man. Come chill with me for a while.
drugs will dig your hole even deeper user
what ideology tbh
I know, but thats the whole fun of it. I know I'm going to die, and I know how I'm going to do it. I'm gonna Kobain it and leave some real cryptic messages to confuse the fuck outta people lmao
Chaos magick. Really interesting and has good teachings. I got about 900mb of PDFs all about it on my home computer.
Don't worry OP, all you need to do is ==KEEP ON ROLLIN==.
imma go kys for failed greentext, bye.
damn it i mean redtext
I'm the exact opposite, I DON'T want to die. I don't want to cease to exist for eternity, and I don't want to experience death. I'm terrified of it because I have no idea what happens after it. The worst part for me is that it's not a matter of if, but when it'll happen for me. Hopefully by the time I'm an old man, they'll have perfected cryogenics so that I can freeze myself and wake up in the future.
same
Join a community of likeminded people, that might help
I've found that telling myself that there is an afterlife helps ease things for me, but I'm really not too sure. I might do what you suggest since it's been making it really hard to function. My inevitable demise really makes it impossible for me to enjoy the life that I possibly only get once.
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It's kind of relieving to admit that everything means nothing to you. You don't even have to place your own individual happiness as the main goal in your life. I think you should try to embrace the benefits of misery and isolation. Look out to society with a detached perspective. Go into the world alone and observe; you don't have to take part in anything if you don't want to, or needlessly struggle. Just watch.
I survived my first suicide attempt and was dead for a couple minutes. I tried to hang myself when I was 16, I was too depressed to think clearly or I could have been successful. The thing is I felt this terrible burning pain behind my eyes and chest, my head was like a balloon. I suppose I started shaking from the spasms. The came the cold, and the darkness from the corner of my eyes.
Then, oblivion.
No heaven for being a nice guy, no hell for my mistakes, not a light at the end of the tunnel, absolutely nothing. It was like being under anesthesia.
I woke up in the hospital handcuffed to the bed and a cop at my side, I was so thirsty and couldn't speak, breathing was so painful. Part of my neck was stitched because the rope dug in my flesh. Long story short, I am a stranger in my own family because of that. I long for that nothingness.
I doubt you believe in God but I'm praying for you, that you'll find purpose and happiness in life.
I'm the living proof that there's no god, I came to terms with the fact we are abandoned to whatever fall upon us. I exist just by chance.
How old are you?
Do you enjoy hurting depressed people?
no?
why not kill him, so this shit thread never comes back up.
If you have any money, now's the time to go to Somali and become a pirate.
Seriously, as another poster already said, go do some wild shit.
I have to wonder though, if you believe in heaven why would you want someone to keep living a miserable life? Wouldn't taking the express lane to St.Peter's Gate be the better alternative?
Who knows, maybe God doesn't hate suicide. Maybe he made OPs life so miserable as a way of telling him to kill himself.
Maybe God thinks OP is a faggot, have you thought of that?
FUCKING LMAOOOO THIS HAHAHAHA
if it's so easy why don't you go do it, dipshit
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Maybe he's not thinking of blowing his brains out.
how did you attempt suicide twice and still survive? Your pussy is showing, user
Gross ineptitude.
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Maybe when I'm dead I won't even care about there being nothing, because, well, it's really nothing. But while I'm alive, the thought of it is terrifying. Being in oblivion sounds nice, but not when it's forever.
I also comfort myself by telling myself that I was dead for eternity and came from it. So hopefully when I die, eternity passes by like it's nothing and I wake up again. But we all know that we reality is harsh, so I have doubts about that.
You have no idea how terrifying the thought of my inevitable end is to me. Damn, I wish I was like you, but I'm weak-minded.
this is exactly what i don't want
Why not?
because nonexistence is preferable to existence
I hate nonexistence. That's the last thing I ever want. What's the point of existing if you're gonna end up not existing anyway?
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God dammit, I don't care if there is a point or not. I just don't want to cease existing. It's incredibly cruel that a fully conscious and aware creature like me has to be brought into existence, suffer, and then cease to exist. I fucking hate it.
You might hate it but that's the truth
The thing is though, I really strongly hope that isn't the truth.
At least it gives me a legitimate excuse to do whatever the fuck I want though and live as much as possible.
You know there's a board dedicated to the subject right? check it out if you'd like good methods for hanging
I've heard thick wide belts are preferable, maybe
Not endorsing it or anything
Some faggot always posts that thing whenever suicide is mentioned, and it's painfully obvious that the fuck-knuckle user who wrote it has never actually HAD depression or even known anyone with it. I agree with him that the best way to get on top of it is to get moving, but he makes it sound like it's the easiest thing in the world, and it isn't. Depression is like your own personal well of gravity sucking you down on your bed/couch/etc. You still need to strive to keep going, but it feels like you've got one of those fucking boot camp ultra backpacks strapped to you. Some days, just getting out of bed and making breakfast is a fucking victory. And no matter how small a victory it is, you fucking take it until that dark weight falls away, again.
You're a selfish sonuvabitch if you do it, and you'll absolutely devastate everyone who cares about you. And they DO care about you, even if you can't force the feelings through the funk in your mind. You'll have to make the effort to choose reals over feels, OP. The depression is a fucking demon, and it loves to talk people into ending their lives. You tell that miserable cunt to go fuck itself, got it?
Haha your a **retard*