Civil War 2: The pain has to even eventually edition

It really does look like cap is about to step up and pound miles tight young boypussy

Bendis would only let a black daddy like Cage fuck his self insert.

So they blow the whole place up, almost killing Cap in the blast. And… wait… is that the fight? Is that it? Tony dressed up like a giant Rhodey and then forced Carol to blow a whole through his chest? Brilliant strategy.

I wonder how they'll retcon away Carol's pure stupidity during this whole event right before her movie.

Cage ain't no faggot
But with bendis anything is possible

I'm sorry but I can't read this anymore. I can't be associated with this travesty.

Rhodey gets punched the fuck out by Thanos (who I think is STILL sitting in a cell) and now Tony gets punched the fuck out by Carol. It flows. It rhymes. It makes me sick to my stomach seeing what American comics have become.

As an Iron Man fan, I wanted to point out how little emotion I feel for all this. Bendis has been writing the Iron Man books (even the ones that come after Tony dies) to be boring as shit. And even seeing Tony's destroyed helmet on the ground and knowing he's ACTUALLY dead next issue isn't as impactful as when I first read issue #230, near the end of the Armor Wars, when Iron Man was blown to bits by a nuke.

And why is Cap being Hydra never addressed in the main book? It's note like it's a secret, so if it ends up being important, how can they just not go into it in the main book? In the end will that vision from Ulysses actually not matter/be saved for some stupid shit after the event?

Thanos has a new book that came out a week or two ago. He's back in space, so… good job Carol. You gave free room and board to a guy known for multiple acts of genocide.

Holy fuck, it's even made with shitty 3D models. No wonder this went over everyone's head.

As an entirely standalone issue, I actually thought this wasn't bad. However that was only because of the Cap-Spidey moments which were kind of nice.

Yeah, the Cap/Miles stuff ain't bad. Ulysses got even more focus this issue than ever, but he's still not really a character.

Oh, and if Ultimates 2 is set after Civil War, then Carol is alive. Well, considering it's a new series, I have to assume that Carol is fine throughout. I don't really feel like storytiming it, but if someone else does: Why is the cover like this? I mean…WHY IS THE COVER LIKE THIS????

Tony's not dead. It was a piloted suit, she nailed the reactor, it's going to blow and kill cap, and Miles will be holding his body in anguish.
And the Hydra/Cap story line will be completely fucking dropped

I expect nothing and I'm still disappointed.

They deleted the lineart layer by mistake?

Maybe. It does look like parts of it are fully drawn normally. Either there was a fuck up, someone wanted to experiment and everything went wrong, or the artist didn't have time to finish and just said "I'm sure the colorist can handle the rest!".

I'll storytime it, though I don't think that the issue itself will have the answers you seek. Judging by the first few pages, I think the writer is cribbing off Multiversity for the overall plot.

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More like Bendis would never let his young bull get emasculated by a FUCKING WHITE MALE.

P O T T E R Y

Is it me or is the shading on Rambeau a bit off.

So… the entirety of Civil War 2 was Carol wasting time that would have been better spent actually taking care of big problems? Big problems like Eternity being chained up?

I hope that fucker on the preview page is just throwing words around and that's not THE Ulitmate universe. Cause that whole thing was a fucking dumpster fire and I'd rather forget it. Bring back the Mangaverse before you bring that shit back around.

The art has a weirdness to it, but the coloring has a super weirdness to it. I don't know what they're going for with it, honestly. I just find it off-putting.

Yep, that's the third time we've seen balack spidey killing a "nazi".

God damn, Logan, will you stand still and look me in the eyes when I'm talking to you?! You've already made 8 turns from me to horse and back!

Storytime Now!

Given that every time Anti-Man uses his powers it looks like a CG effect, I'm guessing it's just a quick, sloppily-done coloring job.

As was established multiple times over the course of Civil War II, Carol Danvers is not very good at her job.

That's the Reed Richards of the Ultimate Marvel universe, so it really could go either way. That said, his wiki page says his ultimate goal at the moment is to remerge all of the different Marvel universes together in order to better prepare them for some big, upcoming conflict, so it probably has something to do with that, instead.

Where do I grind the part blueprints for this Warframe?

Oh God another event title already?

One being planned and written by Al Ewing, the guy who's writing Ultimates^2, but yes, Marvel has a major event addiction. There are several more events planned before we get to Ewing's, for that matter.

It never ends and Marvel never learns. They need to shrivel up and die already.

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But that's wrong, Bendis, you fucking retard. You just offed Banner a few issues ago and didn't She-Hulk die (and then not die?) How the fuck can Banner forcibly rape She-Hulk to produce his inbred hulk children if HE'S DEAD?

What the fuck?

I get that characters, particularly flawed ones, will do things that are dumb from a meta perspective but make sense for them in character. All I'm getting from this confrontation, though, is that everyone involved is an idiot.

JUST FUCKING END IT. I HAVE LONG AGO GIVEN UP HOPE FOR IT TO BE SALVAGEABLE. FUCKING PUT THIS THING OUT OF ITS MISERY

Man fuck Bendis.
Anyways, how would this entire fucking event have gone if Black Bolt were still around?
Would it have been this retarded?

I want to go back to 2011 when NigSpiderman was first introduced. If I showed the Holla Forums of back then this, they wouldnt believe it was made.
Better yet, they wouldn't believe it was a major plot point in THE major Marvel event of 2016.

So if Tony Stark wins the Inhumans fuck off?
Jesus now I know who I'm rooting for!

It's like they're trying to ape Alex Ross with a fraction of the talent necessary for that

Who are you trying to fool here guys?

What a bastard. He's holding the Ultimate universe in his hands and he doesnt have the common decency to fucking tear it in half, take a shit on it, and set it on fire?
What a jerk.

Maybe Hulk gets revived as just the Hulk with no Banner to humanize him… fuck I don't know.

FOR FUCK'S SAKE! MARVEL MAKES ME PHYSICALLY ANGRY!

Why the fuck. That goes against everything they set Galactus up to be. There is an imbalance in the cosmos now, there is no destroyer. They're fucking with their own rules.

From what I've seen, the opening story arc for the first Ultimates series was about transforming Galactus from cosmic destroyer to bringer of life. Then everything got sidetracked by Civil War II and Ewing had to spend half of every issue cleaning up after every retarded decision Bendis had Captain Marvel make.

It might be worth it for someone to storytime those early Ultimates issues, just to see if they figure out some way to reconcile that particular problem instead of pretending it doesn't exist.

It just doesn't make sense. There is no way they can cause it to make sense.

Galactus hungers. He needs to consume the life energy of worlds, or he dies. So where does the power of Galactus the Lifebringer come from? Surely he'd need even more energy to fucking create planets.
And what of Cosmic balance? The 3 faces of the living Tribunal were necessity (eternity), Vengeance (Death) and Equity, which was supposed to be represented by Galactus who ensured life was not infinitely expanding. Who does that now? And now that the Living Tribunal is dead, why the fuck didn't the facets that represented his faces die with him?
Why doesn't Galactus take more powerful heralds from alien worlds instead of some really mediocre earth heroes?
Why does nothing make any fucking sense at all?

We'd be here all day to explain that.

Okay wait now apparently Adam Warlock is the Living Tribunal, and he actually spoke with the One-Above-All (whose name they fucking forgot and fucked up) and talked him into repairing things?

You know what fuck Marvel there are no rules anymore.

Can you at least tell me if DC Rebirth is good? I don't want everything to be trash.

What's going to be worse is having these very same interns replace Bendis for the Epic Crossover Comic Events…

I mean the one-above-all already apparently alternates between a male and female form, because even androgynous omnipotent gods have to be gender-equal.

DC Rebirth is about 50/50 between good titles, and titles that are less-than-good. So far, I think Harley Quinn is probably the only title they've got out at the moment that's as bad as Civil War II and its associated tie-ins are, though. And that's mostly because it's a comedy series that employs Adam Sandler-tier humor, rather than any overall plot, pacing or continuity problems.

I'm 100% sure someone copypasted too many Morrison's scripts for Galactus' dialogue

it's sad being the only person alive who remembers this guy

He is around.

He's just no longer the king and he lets someone else sleep in his bed with his wife.

So Black Bolt got cucked?

So at this point Carol is the greatest threat the Avengers have ever faced.

She kind of represents the SJW bullshit Marvel are pushing, so it makes sense.

Oh yeah, by the way, Death of X is out, everyone.

As predicted, the event that was supposed to show how the world came to view Cyclops as worse than Hitler was instead all about how the Inhumans are a bunch of assholes, and Scott Summers didn't actually do anything wrong.

What are they trying to tell us?

Fuck if I know. I've got the entirety of Death of X on my computer right now, though, if anyone would be interested in a storytime.

Is it so bad it's entertaining?

Isn't Scott just the new mutant Che Guevara because Emma Frost is a fucking psycopath and allowed Scott to be killed just to get rid of inhumans? When are they going to get rid of mutants once and for all instead of just tainting them, killing them and making them suffer? They already tainted my lovely Jubilee.

I've never been a good judge of that sort of thing, so I'll just storytime the final issue, and let you make the call on whether or not it would be worth putting up the rest.

Something along those lines, yes.

wtf did they do to Crystal? Jesus christ

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What's wrong with Emma's face?

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They are bullet proof.

Who's Alchemy and what did he do?

You mean the strained look and the nosebleed she's getting? That's actually related to the plot.

I have no idea what happened in this comic. Is Frost lying or something?

How did Havok get scarred like two-face?

And this is the end of it, anons. Including a plot twist that people were calling starting from issue #2.

And even if you ignore that plot twist, what does the world think Cyclops did? All these months of hype, all these Marvel comics characters talking about how he committed some great atrocity, and this is it.

Cyclops did nothing wrong.

So, what do you guys think. Should I do the first three issues, just to add a little extra context to what happens in the fourth, or is that not really necessary?

What a cop out.

…Does this make sense if you read the first 3 comics?

I don't get why people would say Cyclops was evil when all he did was get "obliterated" by Black Bolt. This whole thing feels messed up. It's like Marvel doesn't realize the Inhumans are killing mutants with their terrigen clouds.

Seriously why the fuck does Crystal have a goddamned dyke haircut? Why are Marvel making all their women hideously unattractive?
[Spoiler]I know why, but I wish I didn't[/Spoiler]

I've read the first one so far. It makes some sense.

A mutant with the power to transform things into other things. He turned the first Terrigen cloud into something not made of Terrigen.

Everything you thought you saw Cyclops doing was actually Emma psychically projecting the image of Cyclops into the minds of the people around her. Cyclops was dead the whole time.

I haven't been following the X-Men books, so I don't really know.

It should be a little easier to follow if you're having trouble, at least.

That's dumb. So a classic character just dies of a nose bleed in a lab without doing anything?

Nah, he died from M-Pox. Terrigen gas caused him to develop super-cancer, and the tumors closed off his airways and caused him to suffocate to death.

It is one hell of a cop-out, though. We were promised a mini-series showing how Cyclops went off the deep end, committed some great and terrible atrocity, and then went out in a pitched battle with the Inhumans, and instead what we got was the mutant side of this book acting calm and rational the entire time, while the Inhumans were the irresponsible assholes who caused several deaths by putting all of Madrid to sleep without any warning. And then laughed and celebrated because they thought they were helping, even though the city was visibly on fire in several places all around them.

I get the sense that Marvel isn't bothering to put any good writers on the X-Men books. IvX is going to be a pile of shit, and ResurreXion is probably going to be disappointing.

Honestly, from the shit writers at Marvel, the X-Men are probably the ones looking irrational.

Remember Red Skull's immigrant speech? That was completely rational and sounded lifted from a regular European person, but he's a villain because he goes against the SJW bible.

from their point of view* I mean.

Probably. That last panel did look like they were trying to imply that Emma Frost had snapped, at least.

The X-Men are supposed to represent minorities though…I guess the INhumans are higher on the oppression scale though since they have Ms. Muslim.

Exactly, they're not high enough on the progressive stack anymore. It's the same IRL right now, muslims are being treated like a sacred cow by SJWs, nobody else matters anymore.

So Xmen are the gays and Inhumans are the Muslims?

I think we cracked the code. Marvel is anti-gay.

Fighting Kang back in Remender's Uncanny Avengers. I recall it being explicitly stated that surgery couldn't fix it.

I didn't notice when I just read through it real fast, but now all I can think about is Logan constantly trying to ride away but Ulysses won't let him.

so when did Carol Danvers become The Sentry?

So now Cyclops is V, except his enemy isn't corrupt government, but randomly appearing clouds that cause mutants to die instantly… and for some reason, the fucking Inhumans don't want anyone to do anything about that and are willing to slaughter and kill anyone trying not to die because of their retarded mists?

Were the Inhumans always this retarded? How did they normally deal with Terrigen mists for their transformation?

It was somehow controlled, I believe. Like there was a specific chamber that they brought people to so they could be exposed.

They had chambers to safely transform chosen Inhumans. But then Thanos attacked looking for his son and Black Bolt destroyed their city because 'lol y not'. Now the terrigen just floats around and the inhumans don't care.

Even in Agents of Shield they had something similar but it made more sense than this.

Seems Marvel Comics has stopped caring about having competent editors & writers. Welp everybody, the business decline is happening earlier than expected. Enough with the "slow painful death" hyperboles, because that's too fucking redundant now. Let's just endure this shitshow and hope it ends faster. Good night, sweet prince.

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Reminder that Marvel is literally trying to kill off the X-men so they don't indirectly give the Fox Xmen movies advertising.

It was originally Marvel's way to reintroduce a bunch of new characters after they skullfucked the mutant race a few times over.

So, it goes like this
Make a big deal about bringing mutants back

does he seek the Anti-Life Equation, too?

it is a meme

His Box has VD.

Black Bolt got BLACKED

Fucking shit. I prefer Cyclops even in this state.
Even back in the 80's and 90's when he had the best and brightest of Marvel's Xmen under his command he was still supposed to become BETTER. It's a fucking rage for me that he never got that chance.
Fucking greedy fuckers at Marvel throw this potential for storytelling away just so they can make some extra dosh on capeshit films.

It's like they don't understand why Magneto is triggered that his people are literally getting gassed to death in front of his eyes for the SECOND TIME.

If the mist kills innocent people and your priority isn't getting rid of it, then YOU'RE THE BAD GUY. Mutants have every right to be pissed. Inhumans are putting themselves over the lives of mutants to the point were they attack mutants for making the cloud nonlethal.

Frost was right.

So… has there been a point at all in the last few years where a reasonable person would feel the Inhumans were in the right? Are the comic writers just wanting to make any and all characters that have a movie coming up someday into the biggest dickbags possible? Carol's a retard, the Inhumans are all pricks, Black Panther can't even run his country last I checked… and I know it's all going to be set back to a status quo right as the movies hit.

This is too retarded, even for me.

Ok is he seeing into alternate universes now or has Marvel gone full retard and put Old Man Logan in the main cotinuity?

jesus christ emma what did they do to you

…What if I told you it was both?

When I saw the page, I presume it would be revealed that the cunt is actually useless because he can only see into other realities, not the reality he's actually in.

But, you know, Bendis.

what the fuck is wrong with marvel writers

I don't even see how people could see Cyclops in a bad light after this stuff. To the outside world it appeared like the X-Men made a potentially dangerous cloud harmless, and then the Inhumans murdered him. I guess the reasoning is that normal humans are less worried about Inhumans because they have a hard cap on how many there will ever be, while mutants could eventually overtake humanity (if they weren't all being killed by clouds that is).

This is terrible.

That's wrong though. Old Man Logan in the X-men comics right now was a version of Old Man Logan from Secret Wars that ended up in the main continuity after shit went down. Bendis is trying to make that alternate reality apparently into an actual future for the main continuity.

No less than you deserve.

Wait, what did Cyclops do wrong?

👌

He had his movie rights purchased by fox.

In universe? Nothing. In a meta sense, at some point his character made the Marvel writers dislike him, so now he's a bad goy.

Inhumans are shit. I fucking hate those guys

You have to think like the authors here man.
THEY DON'T HAVE A HEART. They're where they are due to backstabbing and treason. Them writing heroic characters who would sacrifice themselves for others, characters who decided to give themselves for the greater good since day fucking one, are fucking alien to them. They have no way to relate to these characters, let alone write them. So they end up being something that appeals to THEM in their own twisted worldview. Evil is fighting the narrative, heroism is whatever the author likes. Snark and snideness aren't cruelty, they're extra coolness.

I want the truth to be revealed.
THE INHUMANS HATE THE MUTANTS.
Dont pussyfoot around it. Make it canon, the inhumans want to wipe out the Xmen. Make it a fight, let the Xmen go out fighting.

It'd be fucking hilarious if it turned out his power is to see into alternate universe's futures and that when he started out the alternate universes were close enough that these predictions could be useful but by pushing his power he's seeing into futures that can't possibly happen in their universe. But that's be far too clever for Marvel and doesn't change that this whole event was retarded.

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They kind of had something similar in the Ultimates where the alternate universes sometimes converge with the main one for certain events.

but they can't turn that into a movie because fox owns the X-men. better to just have the inhumans silently genocide them without ever mentioning them by name so you can use their stories in an inhumans movie later on.

No, that's not the truth. The Inhumans don't just hate mutants. They hate humans. They hate aliens. The Inhumans hate everyone who is not an Inhuman.

It's absolutely infuriating, because they could actually play this well if they really wanted. They could make the Inhumans some sort of race of egotistical ubermensch (similar to what they turned the X-Men into a while back) and have the conflict with others grow from there. But the most annoying thing is that they made the Inhumans into those genocidal fucks, but then didn't make any character around them care. Nobody is calling out the Inhumans, nobody is working to stop them, everyone's just like "Oh the Inhumans are genocidal, but that's fine let's leave them be they can do it if they want".

Fuck Marvel. The sheer level of bad writing is more than could ever be done by accident.

They'd make for COOL villains/allies in times of need.
Bastards who have an ethno-state and go around throwing gas at cities to recruit more into their numbers? A good idea for a villain.
But you add in some amount of heroism by making them not retards, and caring to help out in times of need to defend the world? It gives them some depth, but make them pitching in like when Punisher pitches in.
"You're a fucking bastard and I shouldn't want your help. But you might make the difference between winning or everyone dying".
If Marvel wasnt so money-hungry they'd be a great foil for the Mutants. Both see themselves as the future. Both don't seek power over normal humans for their own reasons, and both are just itching to fight.
But no. Now we need to pump out these fuckers. I can't even fucking list any inhumans that get added in anymore. They're just blank fucking slates.

I'd 100% expect the Ultimate Universe to get brought back at some point. It was too popular for too long to keep dead really. Probably won't be for a few years though. 2020 is the 20th anniversary and you know how much Marvel loves anniversaries.

I'd say expect an event that leads to the Ultimate Universe being brought back around then in a form resembling something close to the pre-Ultimatum version though maybe with the X-Men fixed. I'll even go as far as to predict it'll be an event focused on Miles re-learing about the universe and a decision as to whether he'll stay in the 616 or "go back".

They'll go all out on the nostalgia with Bendis/Bagley on the main event book and Millar/Hitch Ultimates tie-in. The other two tie-ins will be X-Men and Fantastic Four and given to the newer voices: Ewing for Fantastic Four, maybe Bunn for the X-Men and some artists like Yildiray Cinar for FF and Dalibor Talajic for X-Men.

Cap this. In 3 years I'll be right.

Art imitating life?

Is Ewing a good writer?

We already established earlier in this thread that Inhumans are a literal allegory for islamist terrorists, but Marvel don't seem to get the connection even though they're the ones making it.

He wrote the issue of Ultimates^2 storytimed earlier in this thread, so feel free to decide that for yourself.

Either the cronyism is huge at Marvel or they pay like absolute shit because a significant amount of the lineart in their comics suck.

WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK

THERE ARE NO FUCKING WINDMILLS IN MADRID

we do have giant bull ads, tho

jjesus this was stupid and i feel stupider just for reading it

Yep, that's (((Marvel))) alright.

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But I thought Reed, Sue, & their kids became the Living Tribunal after Secret Wars to recreate new worlds and port the Ultimates Universe characters like Miles & pals into the 616 universe while Molecule Man laid the groundwork to recreate the dead Ultimates heroes into the 616 universe too (that's how miles got his mom back). So is Marvel just shitting their own canon wholesale again or is it just a case of BENDIS for the time being?

I was unaware they had done that. What a bunch of retards

Nah man, in the Old Man Logan miniseries it shows Bruce Banner very distinctly when he confronts Logan. He hulks out, eats Logan, then gets his dumb ass torn in fucking half from the inside by Logan.

The became… something. Molecule Man hasn't really done anything more with the Ultimate stuff. Ultimately it's just Bendis and Marvel having no idea what the hell they're doing.