So i'm thinking about getting a pet monkey I have always wanted one...

So i'm thinking about getting a pet monkey I have always wanted one. I would take him with me everywhere let him watch me fuck and even smoke cigarettes with me. Which monkey breed would be the most suitable as a pet i'm thinking indonesian even though they're expensive af. No chimps though they're evil sadistic fucks

A porchmonkey sounds exactly like what you're looking for.

Dont compare niggers to monkeys that is an insult to monkeys/apes

I'd get a fuckin' chimp if they weren't so fucking violent and unpredictable.

Technically, Indonesians are human

but yeah, most people will think it's a monkey

I'm thinking of getting a big fucking python and letting it swallow me alive while I fap. I'll keep a knife on me so I can cut my way out.

Enjoy having you face ripped off

I adopted a figdet spinner from the shelter a few days back happy ro say it is the best decision i have made. I've grown to love it and cuddle with it in bed

Small monkeys are not capable of badly hurting you plus if you get a newborn and not expose it to other monkeys it wont even think of attacking you

Just like dog that never seent other dogs would never even think to howl, right?

Dogs are domestic they will love you regardless. If monkeys are exposed to other degenerate monkeys it will result in them revolting against their owner most of the time

So you're saying you're not a degenerate monkey?

Fuck yew dont diss meh. Is that the reaction you're looking for?

What should we do about this lowly faggot Holla Forums?.
His nostrils are shaped like a niggers' although i'm led to believe his intelligence is much more inferior to niggers even is he a hybrid of spics and niggers?
Instagram: @cristianoliveras

Which country do you live in? Most western countries won't let you get a monkey as a pet unless you have proper qualifications. Then you have to choose a place to buy the monkey from and pass endless quizs (spending shitloads of money) to make sure it doesn't have diseases. Then you have to pay a shitload of money to actually buy the thing.

quizs

te$t = quiz now with the word filter

Who gives a shit honestly it is illegal here but since im not taking him with me cross country i dont see how that is relevant. If authorities do find out they can take it for all i care.

And you will get a hefty fine. I hope you can afford it.

Not here you dont. All that happens is the animal in question is taken to the nearest zoo and thrown in the corresponding cage. You do get badly fined for having large predators who can easily mutilate a human

You could go to prison for introducing a foreign animal into a regulated country. You could also be fined by multiple lefty organizations who are dedicated to protecting animals from foreign threats.

just end it mate. It's never going to happen

Lmao stop trying to sound intelligent what you're saying doesnt apply because you dont even know where im from. Lefties here are shot on sight

So you live in North Korea? Honestly though, where do you live?

Hmm

Somewhere where babies drink crude black substance instead of formula and we live in two storey tents whenever we're not out cruising on our camels

So Qatar or Saudi Arabia

Close. Hint: hitler fanboy invaded us

Yemen?

Yemen is so poor and irrelevant nobody would even waste a thought on invading it whats there to claim anyways mud castles? Hitler fanboy=saddam

United Arab Emirates? Iran? Iraq? Oman? Jordan? Lebanon? Turkey? Israel?

meant for

Yes all of them

if it misbehaves, do you plan on spanking your monkey?

No i'd just gopher a beer

kek

He annoys the fuck out of me with his try-hard wannabe funny 'lel so random' bullshit

...

have you considered getting a kike?

This is kinda sexy…