I just farted so loud my neighbour who just got home heard it...

I just farted so loud my neighbour who just got home heard it. I heard her rummaging around next door (very thin walls) and then I farted really hard for a whole second and everything went silent.

I'm so startled

Do you have sex often?

No, but that's the least of my concern now. I'm afraid to farteven though I really want to. An hour ago I farted to my heart's content because I was all alone but now I can't..

SHIT I JUST PUT UP AN AMERICAN DAD EPISODE AND THE FUCKING VOLUME WAS ALL TURNED UP SHITT

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kek

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Wow, I've got a story surprisingly similar to that.
I lost my pride that day.

wut

He applied tactics from Sun Tzu's The Art of War at such an early age, it amazes me too.

Sun tzu's the fart of war*

I managed to sneakily slip out a few farts. I should be good now for a few minutes.

The dysentery of war

The Art of Flatulence

Jesus fuck, user.

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user, I…

b-but farts

wew

FART SEX

butt farts*

If a fart escapes your butt, but you too busy shitposting to hear it, does it still make a sound?

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OP here. I can fart in peace now.

Mason eyes are not fart startlers or bestartled by farts unless it serves them. I could recommend it.

I just force them out whenever I'm in the bathroom so I don't end up farting in public

Good thread.

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too deep for me

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Maybe you both farted at the same time and she stood still because it was a wet one

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Good job user.
Women love it if you go full primal.
Take it from a supreme gentleman like me.