So, you guys know how most of the tie-ins for Civil War II suck almost as bad as the main event book itself? I think I might have just stumbled across one of the good ones, or at least one that's doing something interesting with the premise of the event.
HAIL HYDRA!
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The end.
Thoughts?
It's interesting but like the rest of the Civil War is marred because of the lack of consistency when it comes to Ulysses. One minute he's nigh infallible and able to predict every crime committed (the Kingpin and Ms Marvel tie-ins), the other he's only getting a few big events and completely misses on any subtleties or minor ones (such as this one). It'd have been nice if the various writers had sat down beforehand and hashed out how Ulysses powers work and thus what limitations (or lack of) Danvers and her Hydra supported friends had when it came to predictions. As it stands Ulysses is basically one great big Deus Ex Machina predicting things (or failing to do so) as the plot demands them rather than by any ruleset consistent across books.
I do like the idea of Rodgers secretly manipulating everything from the sidelines though and it would certainly help to explain the question of why everyone is fighting if there were people manipulating it from the sidelines to lead to fighting rather than just have various heroes apparently incapable of having a discussion on a subject for longer than five minutes.
A totalitarian order of multi-national (interplanetary even) precog worshipers makes whatever planned terrorist attacks by literal former Nazi's seem completely justified.
The only real bad part is Red Skull himself wanting to use the same tactics for his own brand of world domination.
Bendis… Can you, for once in your life, not be a total cuck?
My point remains.
The plot on the Steve Rogers Cap book is that Steve's past might have been altered to make him loyal to Hydra, but he's loyal to Hydra's ideals, rather than what it is now. He basically wants to kill Red Skull and Make Hydra Great Again.
Unfortunately, the other issues so far have a lot of the same problems as the rest of Spencer's writing has, so I wouldn't really recommend the series as a whole. It's better than Sam Wilson Cap, but only because having a white male lead gives him less excuses to have characters talk about race (but not none).
Black Spider-Man killing Cap is from the main book, actually. It was the big cliffhanger that closed out the last issue.
And now, instead of finishing up the event this month, it's being delayed 'til January. I wonder if that means this tie-in will be containing spoilers for future events?
image 3
Of course they would kill him off.
Steve manipulating everyone is pretty nifty, probably one of the few nifty things that ties into the core of the event.
was that supposed to be a star wars reference with steve bowing to the imposing hologram of red skull kind of like Palpatine?
Annnd then they'll bring him back with some cosmic boogaloo when they realized that they screwed up royally… Yet again… Great.
And Marvel yet again fails spectacularly to build a proper hero and villain and makes the suspense of disbelief fall yet again, flat on it's fucking face. How the fuck can something get consistently bad without improving just a little
This shit is basically unreadable at this point.
As far as I understand, Bendis is the fat, sausage-fingered hand that guides this event, so even if Spencer (a shameless cuck in his own right) is directly writing this issue, Bendis is still to blame.
As for the content of this comic…I don't buy it. There's no way this was "just as keikaku". I don't know how long they have to make last minute alterations (probably plenty of time, considering how this event is dragging out), but that's my explanation. If they had really planned all this in advance I would expect clues in other tie-ins, consistent plot elements, and more natural characterization.
Even this issue points out that it's really just happy coincidence for HYDRA that the heroes fight each other. Steve's contribution (singular) is quite minor, so it's not even a good explanation for why so many characters are suddenly coming to blows.
Also, Red told him to team up with Carol, but he's pretty clearly fighting Star Lord in that shot. Get your shit together editors. (inb4 "Carol's was doomed from the start because she's a psychopath")
Well, remember, of all the stuff Cap knew, he didn't know Carol had the Guardians involved. So, going by Red Skulls orders, he had just chosen the "winning side" as far as he could tell. You could argue he should have known she could get them as back up, but Tony was their buddy, too. So, if he over thought it, he'd just be betting on one drunk or another.
But yeah, a lack of hints at all in the main book makes these otherwise interesting twists, feel like a complete asspull.
I'm gonna treat this like the new Civil War 2 thread… because it's not worth making another thread for, and no one cares either way.
Uncanny Avengers tie in issues, which at least have some X-Men in them.
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Deadpool's a total bro.
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The precog says the man from the future is going to cause some shit.
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How many books are Uncanny right now anyway?
Quicksilver has an interesting phone sex partner. Also, funeral fun.
As with everything involving the T-Mist, I can understand every action the mutants take to try to find a cure. Everyone else does seem pretty relaxed about it.
Then everyone beats the shit out of Cap. Which is fine, because we all know he's a Hydra agent.
TEAM OVER
MUTHA FUCKING NINJAS! And not the bullshit, made up on the spot so the heroes can talk while fighting a worthless goon kind. The actual established kind.
I'll post next issue in a bit. The cover says Civil War II Aftermath… but it doesn't tell us anything we don't know, and just kinda picks up from here.
Sheesh, cant even wait till the Civil War's end to bring Banner back.
How many book leads are creatively bankrupt and don't know what a thesaurus is? How many corporate suits are looming over them, moaning like zombies, "Braaaaanding…brAAAAANding"?
Why are two HYDRA agents on a team with an extremely powerful telepath? WHY?!
Is Cap not aware that DP is a mutant?
On the larger topic of Hydra Cap, how has no-one see his giant tattoo? How has no telepath picked up on his allegiances? How can he pontificate about people stabbing him in the back when he was right about to kill like 60% of American super heroes at a post world-saving party? And Deadpool is right: Why hasn't Cap killed the Red Skull?
I honestly don't see how this thing ends without everyone killing each other. Maybe that's the plan. It would be a hell of a way for Marvel to shut down their comic division.
And we're back! How does one handle getting fired by Captain America? How does two handle it?
NINJAS HAVE STOLEN THE HULK'S BODY I NEED YOUR HELP!
Damn it, Johnny, when Daredevil's ex girlfriend tells you to burn down a building, just fucking do it.
Just in time for the crazy ninja ritual.
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I don't know why he's bandaged for the cover, when the look is revealed at the end of the book. I assume they made the cover a while ago, and the last page of this issue wasn't finalized yet.
I have no words.
The vision Ulysses had that got Banner killed in the first place is about to come true, isn't it? This is yet another self-fulfilling prophecy.
That would be great.
I'm still waiting for an Aftermath story to spoil the ending of CW2. I mean, does Ulysses die or what? Figure he'd still be important if he's alive.
Wait one fucking second. Amadeus de-Hulked Banner. How did they re-Hulk him? Because if the answer is along the lines of, "he wasn't dead, just sleeping," then HAWKEYE WAS RIGHT! ULYSSES WAS PROBABLY RIGHT! Carol was still stupid though, for agitating a walking cataclysm.
NINJA MAGIC! I do wonder if they'll address that at all.
I honestly thought Civil War was the worst event Marvel could ever have. It pretty much got me to stop reading them for years. But they topped it. CW2 is the true king of shit.
BRAVO, BENDIS.
So… they turned Captain America Steve Rogers from a man fighting for liberties into a shitty autoritarian cunt.
I just wish everyone to die right now.
I think Ulysses CAUSING his visions to come true, intentionally or not.
Aren't visions bount to become true just because people are obsessed with them and the harder they try to evade it the more probable it makes to happen?
Time for another storytime of this shitfest! But before I get to it, I wanted to remind you of this panel from CW2, issue 1, which was published all those decades ago, when this event first crawled onto dry land. Written by Bendis.
Dale Keown doing the cover? Damn, it's been a while since I've seen his stuff. But Keown sure ain't doing the interiors…
I have to imagine every shortcut possible was used on these opening pages.
There is no rhyme or reason to these floating armor bits, and all of them are repeated several times. It's not a good shortcut if everyone sees that it's a shortcut.
If Riri is the future, how come Ulysses didn't predict her? CHECKMATE, ATHEISTS!
It's really weird how Bendis will sometimes hinge issues on events that it earlier seemed that he COMPLETELY FORGOT. Like that time he had the guys, including Tony, brag that they all fucked Carol (which would be really fucked up as her sponsor), and the drinks comment in CW2 issue 1. It's almost like he is defensively bringing it up now to say "I wasn't unaware, I just wrote it to FEEL contradictory!"
Some of this could almost be good. Both of them opening up, airing a lot of their pent up anger, but trying to talk. But Carol's assessment of Tony doesn't really mesh with how I see him, as a longtime fan, and how she should think of him based on the interactions I know between them. It feels pushed in there to tie into all the retarded shit Bendis is doing with Tony's birth parents, and a characterization clearly inspired by movie Tony's regrets tied to the loss of his parents. While it plays well in the movies (where it's more integral to the character), reading the comics through the 80s it never seemed like that big a deal that he lost his folks, because he wasn't Batman.
To me, a much more logical characterization would play off the fact that Tony wears the burden on responsibility as often as he can, and it wears on him the way it is now wearing on Carol. Tony has fucked up a LOT in life, tons of people have died or been hurt by his actions or inactions, and buried himself in work, booze and pussy to try to cope with what it means to be a founding Avenger. I could imagine Carol both wanting to prove that she can handle that burden (even if this whole event is about the fact that she can't), and she's resentful at the implication that she isn't suited for it. But, at the same time she desperately wants to take some of the burden off Tony's shoulders, out of her respect and love for him. In the end, it would be clear they are trying to offer the other a way out, but neither is willing to take it. Both feel the responsibility should be theirs, and don't understand that taking it away from the other would actually devastate them.
That's just how I would have come at it.
Tony cries and then his mom shows up, which ties into the EVEN MORE BORING other Iron Man title, which I've only glanced at once. Also written by Bendis, also treading water until CW2 is over.
I honestly wonder if Riri's book will start before CW2 ends.
OH NO, SOMETHING HAPPENED! PLEASE KEEP BUYING BOOKS!
And some letters. I suppose the first one may actually be real, because it IS impossible to get a cohesive story out of this, even if you were reading one title and CW2 together. You'd have to read the fucking Inhumans book just to know why Stark Tower was in ruins. They just throw out the notion that every issue could be someone's first issue, or that a single title should be easy to comprehend on its own.
Everything I've found has said fall 2016 for Ironheart, while CW2 has been pushed back to January and is getting dragged out beyond where it was initially planned to end by another issue.
So yeah, that's pretty much going to happen.