Why aren't YOU a DJ?

Think of all the ass you could get.

yeah
MAN ass

I tried to be one in the sixth grade, but then a big chad shoved me aside and took over

I tried but i'm tone deaf

I don't get all the cool-guy posturing. You could literally replace this guy and all his useless gear with a playlist on an iPod plugged into powered speakers. He acts like he's actually playing the music. I wonder if he talks to the crowd too.

Why did you stop?

...

because I'm white and don't want to be a wigger faggot who aimlessly spins vinyls around on a table.

But LOOK at how cool he looks! He probably gets hit on non stop by underwear models. On the other hand, his hero is Tupac Shakur, he's married to a black chick, and he's wearing Beats, so yeah…

YOU FOOLS

I could never lower myself like that for even ass. Being a DJ is probably the gayest thing a guy can do after letting a guy fuck him in the ass.

Man ass, woman ass, what's the difference?

Because I have musical talent so became a musician instead.

Musicians make music.
DJ's make noise.

The fact that some of that noise has a recognizable beat and is less annoying than a car alarm is inconsequential.

I can't for the life of me understand why a fully grown adult would want to be paid to play music for people at events. It's a step up from being a birthday party clown.

They are literally just playing music for people and a lot of them have their playlists premixed and just twiddle with the gear to look cool.

I don't want to be a DJ because it doesn't seem like something I would like doing. I would much rather be dancing then playing the music. Also DJs play music but their also supposed to get the crowd moving and have a good time and that can take some skill. Sometimes they come up with better mixes to then the songs they are playing which is always great to hear live. I've gone to an electro club twice and really want to go to a goth club but i'm afraid I won't get accepted there plus social anxiety.

i don't want ass

i want vagina.

You know what else pulls ass?

Having a salary, and a job where I actually work for a living.

Yeah… that never worked for me.

How can you have one without the other?