I'm a 21 years old alcoholic and I go to the store every day to steal my booze. I just moved out of my parents house...

I know. My liver hurts and my stomach does as well. I've developed insomnia and acid reflux among other things due to my drinking.

here's to you

Stay safe, shoplifter ghost

Do you drink coffee in the mornings?

I have a friend who is coming up on 70 years old, and has beeen an alcoholic drinking at least a gallon a whiskey each week, and he went in for a liver test thinking he was going to bee on the verge of death, but it turned out his liver was perfectly healthy. Learned later that coffee prevents cirrhosis of the liver, cutting rates by 50% for people who take four cups a day, the maximum tested dose. Turns out he drinks a whole pot of very strong coffee every morning.

Also, why do you steal your booze? Buy the cheapest Canadian whiskey on offer. It tastes just as good as the good stuff (aside from Crown Royal, which has a different taste from other high quality Canadian whiskey), and can bee had for some $14 a handle.

Why should we pay for your escape from reality?

you are part of reality so part of the problem. either kill yourself or stop complaining.

I stopped drinking coffee actually, since as little as a single cup in the morning keeps me awake throughout the following night. I'll google what you said.

I steal beecause I need money for food. I have a very expensive drinking habit, and I like expensive booze. Fuck that cheap shit. I prefer to kill myself with quality poison

I just went to the shop. Got a bottle of 17% something, eggs, a pizza, butter and two steaks.

Too easy.

ah yes, good old 17% something

goes great with Sprite

what the fuck is this faggot shit

beetter bee good

This wine is pure shit.
Enjoy your hobo drink.

Why steal alcohol, when you can steal hookers, and never return them.

As long as it's not sweet I'll drink it. One sec Imma try

goddamnit that smells disgusting

gonna have to pinch my nose shut to gulp it down

I just took a sip.

That's the most disgusting fucking 'wine' I've ever tasted. Really tempted to go return it like 'I stole this shit and it sucks!'

It makes me gag and nearly made me vomit

holy fucken shit that is disgusting

What are your withdrawal symptoms like?

What prevents you from paying for your booze?

went through my alcoholic experience in high school. Now I just get shitfaced once or twice a month if not less often.

I shake, I get extremely sick, I get terifying heart palpitations and my mind just fucks up. It''s like I'm not myself. Super disoriented and confused, I just spend my time suffering and ailing through the day.

I don't buy my booze beecause I'm good at stealing and it's just so much more profitable.

Gonna go take a shit now, I beet it'll stink sour as hell. See ya letrsss

Matt, you are 41, live in your own place you rent, work awful shiftwork out of choice - simply beecause you are a lazy cunt. Good luck fantasizing about beeing a rock star.

Nah I'm a college student

Try LTD or Northern Lights. Get a 20 oz styrofoam cup, fill with ice, pour half to 2/3rds full of whiskey, fill with water.

Tastes really good.

As for the coffee, get the decaf. It's not the caffeine that has the good effect. Something else in there promotes liver function. Also tastes good with sugar/sweetener and real cream.

Oh yeah, and if you really want to stop drinking, order some niacinamide. 500mg pill when you are feeling the need to drink. You have to want to quit though. It increases your brain function, giving you more willpower.

Myself, I just enjoy drinking, and know that it's not really hurting me since I have coffee every morning.

Do you want to know what it feels like to bee drunk?

...

kek op gonna get diabeetus beefore 30

...

I'm a 26 year old alcoholic, beeen drinking for 12 years. I generally go through a 1.75l bottle or two of whiskey a day coupled with a 24 of beeer every couple days.

I'm never well-rested, I have huge bags under my eyes, everyone thinks I'm in my mid-thirties, and I sweat fucking constantly. My stomach always hurts, I get the shits at random and I'm permanently dehydrated.

It fucking sucks and I can't quit drinking. I can't put the bottle down for even a day. When I hang out with friends during the day, I always choose the place so I can make sure they serve alcohol. I have a flask of whiskey on me at all times and a seperate flask in my car for emergencies. I've taken to storing rations of bottles in secret locations around my house when I'm totally shithoused for emergencies, and when I can't find booze while semi-sobeer I know I can dig around and find something to quench my thirst.

OP you're in for a wild ride. If you need to go to work and keep your drinking hidden, I recommend picking up a large coke from McDonalds, pouring out half of it, and putting vodka in the rest.

how do you steal large bottles of alcohol? i'm going through it in my mind and i can't figure out how you would pull it off without looking extremely suspicious

What are you going to do when you eventually get arrested for shoplifting and have to detox in jail?

The jail staff wont care you're detoxing up until the point you're about to die then they'll shove you in an ambulance to send you to the hospital so they can wash their hands of any liability.

...

It's easy. I just use a backpack and make sure I look fresh, am cleanly shaven and generally don't look like a thug or a crook.

I just hit the shops again and I got groceries for 2 weeks for as little as 1.15 euros.

The trick is to act like a normal shopper. Most men, when shopping, already know what they need. I ususally act like I'm looking for milk or meat, so I go looking for exactly that. I browse the items for a while, and then I just take off my backpack and casually put inside it what I want. Then I go to the liquor section and I do the same.

I just put the bottles and food in my backpack, sometimes in front of other customers and even store presonnel. 99% of shoplifters get caught because they act suspiciously. So all you have to do is act like it's the most normal thing in the world, and it will become just that. Just act super casual and DON'T look around you all paranoid.

Surely a thief wouldn't be so bold as to simply stuff his backpack in front of other customers? That's how most people think. Most people see thieves as stereotypical masked men sneaking around stealing wallets and shit. That's far from the truth.

Usually people think I'm just a college student who is using his backpack to shop.
I just got 2 bottles of whisky, a bottle of champagne and a bottle of white wine. All in total I scored over 50 bucks today.

Basically if you act cool, no one is going to suspect you. If you act all nervous and paranoid, someone is going to snitch you or wait for you at the cash register.

Also if you decide to hit the same shop multiple times in a row, make sure you dress differently.

Just kill myself. I browse Holla Forums all day anyways so I don't really, really, really give a fuck. I suppose I'd be fine in prison, I've stuck things up my ass as large as a water bottle so I think I could take it.

Either you have super powers or you are full of bullshit.

Nice try. Speak for yourself, faggot.

I live in Europe. Our jail is nothing compared to your corporate police state prison gay sausagefest.

Just because you can't pull that shit off because you have tiny balls, doesn't mean I can't.

Are you drunk?

Balls = Having the courage to shoplift

You obviously don't have either, and that is where your disbelief in my thieving abilities stems from.

> lol'd often

Care to try again? Or are you just going to abandon this thread like the bitch faggot you are?