Need help getting laid. Parents are gonna go on a vacation and be gone tommarow night...

I knew her in school for a few months before it ended but she had a boyfriend then. She would always lean on me and was just always friendly. I'm gonna be honest, I'm thirsty and I need ass.

No. I like you creates something scary she has to deal with. Smoke + Netflix and chill is casual and she could walk anytime. Keep it simple. If anything just some flirty compliments. Do not confess your love for her then ask her to come over, she definitely will not come.

This.

Although I think just getting her to your house is too fast.

1. Does she even know you?
2. Does she like you enough to come to your house?
3. Have you ever gone out before?

If the answer to all those is no then you'll have to go on a date with her:

Do something really simply like taking a walk with her and chatting and holding her hips/hands as you walk and listen to her endless, boring interesting stories and share some of your own, then at the end invite her to your crib for movies and pizza and then you escalate.

Whatever you do, don't do this. Tell her you think she is cool instead, don't tell her that you like her.

I knew her at school before it ended and she texted me a few days ago she wanted to hang out. Not sure if she wants to come over though

Its solid. You didn't just meet her. In order to get some ass you are going to have to risk some rejection.

Don't confess love, like, etc, and create a bunch of feeling for her to deal with, you will freak her out.

Just casually ask her to hang out. Lines like "House is so quiet with my parents gone, I could use some company. Lets kick it… Do you smoke?" give you plausible deniability. She didn't reject you. You didn't ask her out. No feelings. Causual.

act casual as fuck.
Act like you don't care if she says no.
And mention alcohol or drugs in passing

she texted me a few days ago she wanted to hang out

Fucking Perfectttt! Fucking Suggest something to here then!! As long as you don't ask her for sex directly, or confess love , your fine.

Worst that happens, she says no to netflix + chill. If she likes you she will suggest something else. If she doesn't, suggest hanging out somewhere else ON A DIFFERENT DAY.

And what did you reply?

This, fam.

Ass is only for the brave.

This, fam.

Ass is only for the brave.

kidnap her

> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3
> I want Kennedi Cotarelo (from NC) to forgive me, even if I have to spamkill this site :3

Thanks for all the advice nigs. I'm gonna call her now after I finish this bottle of beer. Wish me the best. I always new Holla Forums would help me I needed it

We're with you bro, slam that pussy hard for us. Even when you are inside her, we'll be with you in spirit!

Good luck!>>5855560

you should probably text bro. Slower you can think about it. Less thinking on feet. less awkwardness. Don't convey your emotions at the time.

post results! Did she agree to meet ??? Screen shots of texts???

I just texted and now waiting for her to text back. She is practicing to be an EMT so it may be some time, I'll post as soon as she texts back

What did you text ? Not some paragraph invitation right? Start with greeting right?

Just said Hey

Dude, tell her your parents are going away and ask her if she wants to hang out. Tell her that you can play her favourite series or a movie. Mention there will be pizza.

Tell her that you have fifty dollars cash, a fat sack of herb, a 12 pack, netflix, and a pizza.

If she says no then, she'll never say yes. Move on to the next item in your book.

lol that woman fill feel like a whore if you approach her that way. no way she responds. $50 isn't impressive.

Yo waddup, house to myself. Netflix and chill? Hmu fam.
Only two answers
Or

She is working today, and I just asked her about the job she was last working at.

OP, this is the only proper thing to do since you have the house to yourself.

get a rag and chlorophyll, knock her out, drag her to your place, cum in her ass and drop her at her front door.

if you're too beta to carry her, just find a bush or something to put her behind and do it there. problem solved.

post pics of her faggot

Smooth. Just keep talking. Ask at end of conversation.

This nigga is a genius. Shove plants in her face, preferably roses. Then wipe her tears of joy with the rag.

She will be so happy , she wont be able to walk. You will have to pracitcally drag to her to your place. Make sure to walk her home, when your done, back to her front door.

But, if you can't handle walking back because your so DTF you beta at least find a bush!

EPIC

oh fuck, chloroform, you know what i meant you salty nigger.

Me and her

whats her last name?

wow user, i think i have the same sweater vest, but it isn't a vest

big fat titties

post moar of her

don't fuck up and dox her + you.

Wew

oh lawdy

who gives a shit . fuck off.

OP, just send her this message:

"my parents are gone for a few days, do you want to come over after work? we can watch some television, eat some taco bell, and hang out."

This will work OP, just do it

I mean i-if you w-want to :-S

Good idea but should I ask if she has work tomorrow or just offer?

Just offer

I don't think you should phrase it as a question either.

'My parents are gone, come over and we'll do shit'

etc.

whether or not she has work tomorrow is irrelevant to tonight's offer. dont ask her about work, just send her the offer exactly like how I wrote it

nope thats too forceful, just copy/paste what I wrote earlier. ive done this a lot and i always have good success using this method

Netflix and chill has connotations of fuck though.

exactly why I wrote "television", added "taco bell" and wrote "hang out" instead of chill. its the same idea, but with different words.

This will work. Post screencaps of her reply and we will help you so you dont fuck it up.

Maybe. I'm not sure but it seems to me you would get a lot of people who think it's just some friendly guy whereas mine has connotations of greater urgency

Still asking girls to hang out is awfully beta

I'm asking her if she wants to hang out tomorrow night cause that's the day my parents leave.
I would also add thanks for everyone on this thread hanging in there, you guys aren't so bad

If you come off too forceful you'll turn a woman off real quick.

If shes really into him, she'll bite. If they arn't hella good friends, telling her what to do will result her walking.

I fucking did it. My heart is beating like a hundred miles per hour

Post some screencaps of her responses, we want to see

OP fuckin delivered. Youre a good guy OP

...

I think television was a mistake. it sounds boring as shit. Netflix & Chill has connation at least netflix is fucking hip lol. Same with fucking taco bell. Too specific.

Doesn't have to be perfect though.

Smooth movee for trying though. Could work! Definetly post results. Your a boss bro. You got this!

Just a little too early Too. You could have carried conversation a little longer. A nice conversation would give her a positive image of you before she made any kind of decision.

OP is the hero that we need

...

what was her response?

I fucking love you guys. Now what?

for starters, make sure you have taco bell tomorrow.

she gets off at midnight, that means she will probably want to stay over at your house

the real question is, do you even have a tv?

Like what do I text now?

hold on, give me a min - im composing

"Awesome, should I pick you tomorrow up after work then? We can grab taco bell on the way back to my place"

Awesome. Keep fucking talking. Acknolwedge it. Say sum shit like for sure.

If you had asked at end of conversation you wouldn't have this problem!

"Forr sure. Its been a while since I seen youuu :). Looking forward to it . 2 Jobs now ? Man, you really working hard! "

make sure you pay for the taco bell too, none of that split the bill bullshit

no man, dont send that. you dont want to get too chummy with her or she will be turned off

Can't drive
:^)

okay hold on, let me think

how you gonna get the taco bell then? do they deliver where you live?

Shes coming over at midnight after work while his parents are gone. She knows whatsup

but that girl is like 8 years old, what is wrong with you?

yeah, but you dont want to be seen as clingy. in this situation its best to keep communications to minimum because she already agreed to rub op's knob tomorrow night. dont want to fuck it up by saying something stupid

You have to figure out how the fuck to talk to her. You got a few hours alone with her. You can't keep asking. You gotta take this at some point .

Just come over at midnight then #fam

She didn't agree to anything but free taco bell. He has to start expressing some interest eventually. I agree he should have waited till end of conversation so he wouldn't have to chat her up for the rest of the night.

GTFO w/ that.

okay this is what you say then:
"Alright, ill see you tomorrow around midnight then. Just come on in, my front door will be unlocked."

And you better hope taco bell delivers to your area:
tacobell.com/delivery

and make sure the door is unlocked too

GTFO out with that! Front door unlocked. Is this an ambush ??? OP can meet her at the front door at least.

Don't say 'front door' just say door.

'Front door' sounds kinda weird

...

dude its okay, that just shows that op trusts her. she will feel indebted to his kindness and shove his cock down her throat in payment

yeah i mean they are next door neighbors, theres no need for formalities. just be casual and dont fuck it up by saying something stupid between today and tomorrow night

OP You owe us more pics of her!

Show me a pic of her feet and ill tribute it

This mutha fucka is for sure trolling. You tell her front door is open, you sound weird as shit. You don't come to the door?

You ever read creepypasta?? The front door is always open for some reason, come right in they are … somewhere.

GTFO w/ that. It sounds like he doesn't care enough to even open the damn door.

Hope this is good enough

Its sounds like you ended the conversation right there. Too early .
Send another message quick with some question or another. Ask how she ended up with two jobs or w/e . talk a few more minutes at least.

"LOOKING FORWARD TO IT"

DUDE, you are too beta. You need to be stronger and show your dominance.

Whatever you do, dont text her until tomorrow.

ALSO MAKE SURE YOU HAVE TACO BELL

She lives 3min away. Not neighbors. They don't know each other well enough for that.

DONT BE TOO CLINGY OR SHE WILL BE TURNED OFF. OP ALREADY REVEALED TO HER THAT HES A WIZARD

>open the door get on the floor everybody walk the dinosaur and say…

Do you really not know how to treat a girl, OP?

3 minutes walking is not the same as 3 minutes driving. 3 minutes walking is literally across the street

'Incidentally I have condoms so don't worry /bout /it

I know that guy in the pic real life, and hes literally a homosexual

What a fag. You think random girls are looking for 'dominance' ??? Good luck with that. Do you have a girl?

How many katana do you have OP?

YEAH IVE GOT TWO RIGHT NOW

He needs to express intrest. He needs to confirm their meeting. He needs to continue conversation longer than extending invitation and accepting.

Ive only got two, do you think its enough?

Last response sounded too pathetic and beta dude and even a little sketch. She's probably thinking that something is up.

Should have just ended it with a "cool".

no, thats too white knight. girls dont like white knight sjw cucks.

be like trump and build your wall

yep, it was too beta. OP needs to consult with us before he sends any more texts

OP here. I would like to thank everyone here. I have extreme spaghetti syndrome, I couldn't do this without you cunts. Even if she doesn't come, I passed the challenge of asking her. I fucking love you Holla Forumsros
Will post nudes if i get any.

Litterally same situation. Both looking long term. fuck the pressure man.

Didn't get them by order them around or displays of dominance. Girls are normal fucking people, they don't want to be order around or have games played. They like it when you express interest but not too much.

What about her feet? Check her instagram and post some of her feet here please!

Smooth move. Scary asking. You fucking did it. Now Learn to talk to her by yourself She didn't agree to fuck you yet. Treat her like a fucking human. Don't drool all over her (too much intrest) or ignore her (too little), or alpha her orders.

IM MARRIED AND MY WIFE SAYS I CAN HAVE OTHER GIRLS. MY OTHER GIRL SAYS SHE DOESNT MIND BEING "THE OTHER GIRL". ITS WIN-WIN FOR ME. I JUST WANT TO GET A GIRL PREGNANT AND HAVE A BABY, BUT BOTH MY GIRLS ARE INFERTILE.

FML

did she reply to your last message?

Not yet

Luckky though.. My chicks don't know about each other. I have to coordinate shit. Its nightmare thats going to fall apart on me one day.

I didn't pull em with orders though. I pulled them by expressing interest, hanging out, getting physical. Making shit official.

Luckky though.. My chicks don't know about each other. I have to coordinate shit. Its nightmare thats going to fall apart on me one day.

I didn't pull em with orders though or ignoring them. I pulled them by expressing interest, hanging out, getting physical. Making shit official.

Chans bias is way to alpha. Ignoring chicks doesn't get you pussy, it gets you lonely.

Listen kid, you remind me of me at 14. I like you. I remember my numerous failed attempts to throw parties whenever my mom went out of town.

You're skipping way too many steps here. You don't just go from "I like her" to "She comes over to my house and we fuck." She doesn't even know you like her. Even if you invite her over, you expect her to just jump on your dick as soon as she gets there? Honestly, OP.

Either just talk to her and let her know you'll have the house to yourself and hope she wants to *hang out* -and ask if she has any plans if she doesn't say she wants to come over- or find some other random girl if all you want is to get your dick wet. Try craigslist or omegle.

Where i live dates go like smoke. netflix . fuck. routinely. Not ever girl is down, but its not outside the releam of possibility. wtf is craiglists. we have tindr now.

I am now jealous and part of me wishes to in some way sabotage your efforts and take your place.

Good luck man, she's hot.

didnt you see the pic of op with her? he didnt even hover hand it. she knows he likes her

dont sabotage op. him getting laid is in our best interest because he will post nudes of her

And feet,,, right?

...

OP back, just wanted to let you fucks know I'm gonna update if anything happens tonight so keep an eye out.

BUMP!

Patiently waiting for the results OP

Made a new thread

wtf are you? Even people in wheel chairs can drive.