Arrives in a new region

It's completely unfilmable, you'd have to be insane to even try. Besides, I doubt Christopher Tolkien would allow it.

Soon.

It won't stop Hollywood from trying. When Christopher Tolkien meets his end the bags of money will be dangled in front of whoever owns the rights.

Nolan will. Digits confirm

What did he mean by this?

Who do the rights go to?

Christopher Tolkien's mulatto bastard son

Silmarillion filmatization confirmed.

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He was trying to tell them to take the fucking eagles after they get out of the mountain, but literally all of them were retarded and didn't even think about it.

Why was Feanor such a huge cunt?

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It's going to happen, isn't it?

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ftfy

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You forgot Legolas pham

i know that you're joking, but you should unironically kill yourself just for thinking that

I don't want to think about it.

He's right you know

hopefully never

it would be unfilmable even for the most talented director, let alone for peter hackson, especially after seeing the disaster he made with the hobbit

LITTLE

ELF

EARS

I was referring to his Katy Perry tiny dick shot
Is there a more ==JUST== person than Orlando?

JUST MY LIFE INTO PIECES

He's not as small as the Cuck King (Louis, we haven't seen Prince Cuckold Mike's dick yet).

BIG

For a sec I thought those were hip hop lyrics

So which Valar will they cast as niggers?

for being flacid and in the open near wind and water, that's actually a pretty respectable size

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I've seen this said, and I know its bait, but my autism compels me:

The Eagles were fully sentient bastards who would've stolen the ring of power. Stop memeing this.

How does the orc women look in Tolkien's legendarium?

They would have also gotten wrecked by Mordor's drakes or whatever they were.

Who would win, Lord of the rings armies or Game of thrones armies?

can we get some real movie buffs in here?

Never mentioned, except vaguely.

Tolkien went through multiple concepts with the Orcs. He had them be soulless constructs at one point, or minor evil spirits, but finally decided on tortured Elves.

Based on this last interpretation, Orc women would exist, but Tolkien seemed in general not to want to dwell on Orcish culture or anything about them except that they were corrupted.

He stopped writing his Fourth Age stories because he determined that Gondorians would start adopting Orcish culture and it depressed the hell out of him.

Armies in Game of Thrones are much larger - ten thousand is a giant force in LotR but about a fifth the army that the North alone has, but people in Lord of the Rings are superhuman.

Shit like the Nazgul or trolls or ents would demolish GoT armies. Even dragons wouldn't be too huge of a force add since LotR armies have experience against nastier ones.

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that's supposed to be small?

Looks kinda small to me.

Tolkien sounds pretty redpilled in that quote.

Shitty jokes are b8 now?
Not everything is intended to rile you up.

That sounds pretty depressing.

You don't so that? I do that every day.

I do this while stepping outside of my apartment

says the guy who hasn't even seen Sully

are noldor the niggers of eldar?

and then you complain that you can't afford food and therefore you deserve more of other people's money

Aa soon as Disney gets their pawns over it and make a politically correct, progressive version of it.

It's actually mentioned that the army they used to make the decoy attack at the end of RotK (around 7000 men) was the size of Gondor's army vanguard in the past. The armies who besieged Mordor at the end of the Second Era were much, much bigger.

reddit

Hey now, I'm not black.

you did say you're on the dole though, i.e. you're living on money stolen from others

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Hollywood is retarded af, but they know their audience is retarded as well, so they need to make that shit for their audience to keep up.

What a terrible way to end the line of Tolkein

What?

him on the left. he got pretty lucky with how many genes he got from his dad

So the filthy haradrim won in the end.

Rockin that CIA outfit I see

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What? What the fuck are you talking about? The man is 92 years old and there is no way that´s his son… at maximum he is his grandson.

It's his wife's son.

Out of all the things to complain about in these movies, this one is the most insignificant and mundane tbh

People forget that the book is told first entirely from Frodo's perspective and then afterward other characters fill him in (in each part). The films edited everything together for pacing purposes.

To be fair, this isn't that unrealistic when you come over a hill and a beautiful sight comes into full view for the first time on your journey. They make a point of showing how Middle Earth is full of breathtaking sights. IRL when traveling people often stop to take in a sight.

Don't forget
They narrowly avoided this being in the original films.

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The case might be but 92 year old guys can get the oven going m80.

I feel that the movies completely missed the point of the books.

I don't know who the mulatto kid is, but Chris Tolkien's son Mario has made mention of wanting to whore the books out more. Chris Tolkien disowned him over it, but they seem to have since reconciled.

Maybe this is where the meme originated since in the Vietnam war movies I've seen they've never played that song.

Guess who I just found on Steam.

Dropped.

I liked that shit, it made everywhere they went feel more magical and grandiose. Helm's Deep, Isengard, Gondor, the Mines or Moria.

Without naming them they're just fort, city, kingdom and cave. Your complaint is like being upset at James Bond movies for having those little scenes of a cityscape with text like "Moscow" "Paris" "White House" etc. It conveys the passage of time, the change of setting and a ton of other shit I'd name if I didn't stop caring about this argument a sentence ago.

That's not small, he's uncut. You realize besides making sex more pleasurable for both parties, the main purpose of a foreskin is keeping that shit inside your body, right? You know, like most animals, cats and dogs and such, how they don't walk around dragging it on the floor.

Ever heard the expression "I'm a grower, not a shower"? The statue of David for example, probably like five or six inches erect. From that perspective he's probably packing around 10 inches.

What does Burchoo have to do with this thread?

Children of Hurin was also great.

Beren and Luthien comes out in May, can't fucking wait.

Reading through the Silmarillion has so many parts where you want to read a whole fucking book about it, and I felt exactly that way regarding Tol Sirion and Sauron's first major appearance

They did, and it is best solidified by JAckson's pants on head retarded version of sam's speech. HURR DURR MR FRODO THARS THINGS WORTH FIGHTING FOR give me af ucking break

Tolkien was a devout Catholic and the greatest message of the books is that there are things worth SUFFERING for. Even if in the end of all things Eru's will had Sauron being triumphant, it is a small part of a more glorious song

movies are still 10/10 best trilogy of all time and a watchable and enjoyable adaptation. Everyone involved in the hobbit movies (its okay because John Rhys-Davies will be safe) needs to be gassed immediately.

Also, as an additional note her last guy before this was Russel Brand, the whole reason she posted all that shit about "not liking fuccbois" you can google his nude, he's genuinely microscopic. Maybe that's what she prefers. Maybe she has a tiny pussy. Maybe she just likes lanky British guys with slender wee-wees.

My body is ready.
>Even if in the end of all things Eru's will had Sauron being triumphant, it is a small part of a more glorious song
I almost wish I had read the Silmarillion before LotR because that's such a strong theme that's easily ignored if your brain runs on modernism but is put so elegantly yet simply in the Ainulindalë and the rest of the Silmarillion. There's a continuing theme of loss and fall but yet a greater and more wonderful whole throughout Tolkien's entire legendarium.
Happy new year, user.