The most useless leftists to ever exist

I'll start.
Street hooligans who bash with other bands of street hooligans, not posing any threat to the establishment whatsoever and spook the normies.
Basically a schoolboys who never worked a day and have no unsheltered life experience, but believe that they have all the answers and are the bestest of all. Somewhat understandable youth maximalism, they may yet and probably will mature, but are cringe nonetheless.
Basically fight for the soviet memorabilia in countries where it has extremely bad brand value - and for good reasons. It's one thing to call yourself communist in Russia and wave a Soviet flag, but only a moron would do it in its' former puppet states. Do what Bernie Sanders and even stormfags did, idiots, move the Overton window and disconnect from symbols that have bad historical significance there.
Basically, ancoms. We will sit on our asses unless someone offers us a wholesale fully automated luxury gay space communism. In the meantime we'll sit on our asses, but, mind you, we aren't some apolitical slobs. We are better than you all!

Who will never leave their bedroom and engage in any actual revolutionary organisation ever

go against the wall

succdems are the most useless

Well, they did things, however would you judge them, which means that they aren't objectively useless already.

Leftists who exalt anything "local" and leftists who think that you challenge a system by creating a little space where its rules don't apply (anything from Horizontalist protesters to Commune people apply here)

How about 'muh working class' fetishists who think that only ironworkers can be true socialists?

Just look at the thread you started.

/thread

Thirsty incel "socialists" who try to invade every leftist organization so they can talk over others and defend rapists.

fuck off Holla Forums

Antifa are absolutely disgusting, they do nothing and they only show a violent side condemned by anyone, this damage the image of the left.

...

Either you are retarded or american.

Defending Stalin'e every excess with the vintage talking points lifted straight from Molotov's speeches that only they will ever believe is a credible source, and that they believe is the only credible source.
Self-explanatory, and it always devolves into spam and trap porn.
'no guise appointing a political officer at the fast food joint to monitor people for haets peach because some landwhale was allegedly called a mean word is both more effectual and will make our cause more sympathetic to outside observers than, say, trying to raise the minimum wage, improve working conditions or petition for the removal of surveillance crap srsly guise c'mon guise'
'de hwite man is not oppressed in the workplace, online or in the street, only my group is and if you're white you must purge yourself of your original sin by agreeing with me and buying indulgences from me'
you want to help stop war well we reject your application
you crack too many jokes and you eat meat
also everything has to be for vegan/organic/insert other lifestyle product and taste of anus
see previous entry, everything is super cereal and having a sense of humor is as reprehensible as pissing into the open casket at a funeral.
opposite side of the Golden Mean from the no-fun-allowed crowd, they'd rather do a play with paper mache effigies and Ben Garrison-tier analogies than something boring but practical like handing out flyers or something
self-explanatory
'but what if the child consents tho??'
They show up, they ask leading questions to confirm previously-held biases, they act smug and talk over you, they leave. They're usually boomers, fat, rich and in groups because ironically their tiny balls are collectively owned and can only be found when they're in a group. I wish they'd do that a few times to a group that wasn't pacifist and/or under police supervision, or that I could at least show them pictures of goatse or furry porn or something IRL like I do when they start in with that bullshit online.
'cops are workers too'
'you're just ghetto for not wanting to talk to them'
'but what if the guy was doing something before the recording started'
'how could you do that to a poor defenseless trashcan moral efficacy = completely rekd you're no better than the people killing people with drones so much for the tolerant left aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa cocks'
'I too am interested in smashing the Illuminaughty Reptilian Jew Cabal, my fellow kids!'
They pander to the group so they can sperg out about their special snowflake ideas, contribute fuckall else, vanish so fast at the first sign of trouble you don't even see a puff of smoke shaped like them, then they switch sides and start licking porky's boots when their obvious sophistry fails to get them any votes.
They would rather shill for their group than do what everybody is there to do and they drive people away in droves. Bonus points if they have the charisma of a used prophylactic stuck to your shoe.

'my job is being threatened wtf I love Karltural Marks now, my fellow kids!'
>the gay educational community
They take their condescending, disapproving work voice to events and try to run everything by the rules of whatever school they crawl out of whenever either their shekels are threatened or they think they can get another captive audience for their batshit ideas. The sort of people who liked school so much they never wanted to leave. Not literally every educator is like this, but it's about 50/50 chance they will be. Usually the shit ones are boomers and the good ones are GenXers and oldsters, fancy that.
Usually scenewolves and twinks. The same kind of people who show up to furcons to get laid, also the same kind that are part of the cycle of fandoms degenerating into watered-down kid-friendly copyrighted trademarked corporate-sponsored police-preapproved politically correct inoffensive normalfag cancer. Like the opportunists they cut and run when the fun times stop.
Lesser Porkies with 'alternative-y' businesses. Bonus for being crackpot patent medicine quackery like homeopathy, or lifestyle products like organic vegan food.
They have built a life around protesting shit, and have long ago been subverted, infiltrated or bought-out by the local establishment. They will always argue against anything that isn't an obvious bad idea, ideally after using their ill-gotten resources to become indispensible to the group, and threatening to withhold same unless the group adopts whatever suicidally stupid tactics have kept things in a holding pattern for a fucking decade. They think they are a vanguard.
Because the workers of the world have the time, money and energy left over after busting their asses all day to do that.
'muh lesser of two evils'
'idpol is leftist, my fellow kids'
'realistically Obomber/Cunton stands the best chance of us accomplishing our goals, ignore the fact that they flipflopped repeatedly and are pro-surveillance, my fellow kids'

sage for breaking my stool into two chunks

disagree, fash need to be threatened. State need to know there are those willing to throw bricks and bottles at them. More people should do this, there should be general insurrection

ITT: sectarian bullshit

In other words, every leftist is cancer

how many levels of meta we on right now comrade?

Good posts, capped

No one pisses me off more than these faggots.

If only you directed your energy to reading Bordiga instead of anger…
:^)

There's literally no point

No, also people will not do it, because civil violence will be repressed by the state and condemned as reproachful by ordinary people.

Nope. All of these people exist as described. I've interacted with them. If it wasn't giving too much info on them or me I could name every one of them other than the online ones. I would be incredulous too, but it's true.

I am, but if you can't explain why I should read your shitty little book, then I'm not going to.

No that is exactly why you do do civil disobedience

Okay so this is only related to some countries, but here we have parties which have big amounts of ex-GDR border guards who don't really give a shit about implementing socialism but rather want to turn the party into a veterans clubs for granddads
Not talking about every leftcom here but the ones who crank up the whole armchair thing to the point where they talk about stuff like "Nihilistic Marxism", spam Eden Sauvage articles everywhere, and do nothing else but complain and literally accepted that we are going to have barbarism
Some parties, and sadly some Maoist groups, are just scientology cloaked in red. Usually when the have the same chairman for decades, and when their events are family festivals with creepy suburban moms all your alarmbells should ring.
Twinks with tunnel earrings and old smelly fuckers with a Che Guevara patch on a jeans west thay ride their bike through the city and are being recognized locally with some nickname like "communist Mike" or some shit.
There is always this one guy in every party who's conception of dialectics is indistinguishable from magic, people look up to him and he shouts down dissent by saying it's undialectical.
People who are unable to speak normally to normal people
Always this one hippie chick who engages in like "activism olympics" basically the more hours you work in a homeless shelter the more socialist you are

Maybe I come up with more later

You've got to be pulling my leg now. This describes basically every MS Paint maymay I've ever made while drunk that self-satirizes the worst leftcom strawman, and you fucking attribute it to ancoms, some of the most activistic people around? For shame.

AnComs on this board are very different from real life AnComs, at least from my experience. By that I'm actually trying to say that I like the AnComs here more than the ones out there.

hello fellow leftists! i know we all love leftism but isn't every kind of leftism lame and bad! let's talk about that

Even the communizers are more present, and they would first qualify as ultra-left and then maybe spiritually as successors of left communism.

I want that real hatred for the historically most present type of leftcoms fam: the Bordiga-flavoured Leninists and the council communists.


Well most IRL ancoms are first and foremost anti-fascists too and engage in that type of activity. What I'm saying is that ancoms on this board as you described them are to me an oddity (I can hardly even imagine one like them).

They are cool tho, they have armchairs and doesn't afraid of any Stalin

Everyone here

How strange

Can't accept any criticism, will call you sectarian, ulra-leftist, CIA, neoliberal, shill, privi-leged. Everything is 1917D chess, will spam edgy unfunny reddit memes with their idol, obsessed with electoral politics, MSM and neoliberalism. For them socialism is edgy social democracy. Future Democrat/Labour voters.
Lesser evilism is bad, but not supporting Mugabe/Milosevic/Assad makes you automatically a racist imperialist. They dismiss every criticism as American/Israeli propaganda and don't give a fuck about class struggle. They alwas ignore class in their analysis.
Their sole problem with capitalism is muh globalists and muh immigrants. Everyone else is a rootless cosmopolitan/neoliberal globalist shill. Somehow nationalism isn't idpol. They will claim that patriotism isn't the same as nationalism and that "there is nothing wrong with loving your people". Can't define what a nation is. Will spam Tito/Stalin/Mao/Marcos quotes frantically.
Co-ops are socialism, socialism is compatible with markets, Yugoslavia was a success, Proudhon was based, Marxian economics is a thing. Haven't opened a book and proud.
Debunking bourgeois propaganda is more important than reading Marx or class struggle. Usually the worst LARPers. Hopelessly illiterate.
They don't have any actual theory and believe in the "left unity" meme. All they want to do is trigger libruls/their parents/right-wingers. For them electing a succdem is a win and they will cry about the fall of the USSR/Cuba/China despite not being MLs. Most of this board.

me.