They were all impressed with your halston dress

they were all impressed with your halston dress
and the people that you knew at elaine's

and the story of your latest success
kept 'em so entertained

oh, but now you just don't remember
all the things you said, and you're not sure you want to know

I'll give you one hint, honey
you sure did put on a show

Other urls found in this thread:

vocaroo.com/i/s1AR2tdmO2OJ
youtube.com/watch?v=VDvr08sCPOc
youtube.com/watch?v=gmA6MrX81z4
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

oh do you? such as?

ITT we exclusively use garden path sentences.


No problem.

pass.

I only hab $7 until tomorrow

my dick but more on that later, I need sleep


laters rin

oh

lewd.

sleep well. wish me luck on staying awake so I don't keep my ride waiting for utah.

Rin just mad that tokai has loco as his side bitch...

re parse...

(nice freind~)
*snuggles warmly for comfort and company*

what

???

wat's "garden path"?

:|

The old man the boat.

The raft floated down the river sank.

The horse raced past the barn fell.

y utah brah

uh.......

what old man

ohhh..... that's wayyy weird.
it's missing punctuation!

Nani sore

No.
All three of those are completely, grammatically correct.

You just aren't reading them right.

the dog under my legs fart

I wish you had your 3DS

no ur wrong!

it's broken!

my mother is getting an award up there.

the dog fart again


how come

Garden Path Sentences.
The way most people parse them leads to funny misunderstandings.


Yes, because god forbid you're wrong, or doing something wrong.

Wouldn't it just suck if Trump still won because people didn't turn out to vote for Hillary?

Sometimes I love Erin.

Other times I love Erin.

It's basically a full time job at this point.

because you could play the sun and moon demo

i'm a good person!
:c

that is nice. mother things are nice.

whoah dude

fuck the sun and the moon

i like tera firma, and older games, and some of their remakes

yeah I suppose

good luck on staying awake

Good people can admit their shortcomings and when they're wrong.

thanks, user.

but
pokemans

pokemon R,B,Y,G,S,C,R,S,E,OR,AS only worthy pokémon games

they are showing weakness!
shorting themself!

They should have more back bone!
they should stop being soo.... self depreciating!

...

nope

no re

It's not self-deprecation to admit when you're wrong, or when you can't do something.

...

Alolan Exeggutor is the best thing to happen to pokemon since its inception.

nope, not hg/ss. bad remakes.


yep

you mean alolan in general. specifically vulpix.

Hg/ss are the best ones in the fucking series

Pokemon red, blue and yellow... everything else is garbage and you are garbage for having those preferences.

Alolan Exeggutor memes are literally the best thing ever.

'you can't do it', so it means you're not good enough?

doesn't sound very confidence building...

show me some.

loco really is a a sad little bitch

That's a weird leap of logic to make.

Don't make fun of Ioco

what about Pocket Monsters Green

nice

i like:
r,y,s,c,r,Lg,prl,blk,x,sun

how many can you fit in your bum

no leaping required.

i dunno
i wouldn't be able to imagine.

Eggscalibur is too large to post. :

well that sucks

...

Alolan Exeggutor might just be the most useful pokemon ever.

...

Better version of that last one.
'cause it goes the extra mile to include sanic.

you're right. these are the best thing ever.

Miku's hair always looked funny.
Now I know why.
That's not hair.

It's just two exeggutor.

I havent got time for that/

...

DOUG DIMMADOME OF THE DIMSDALE DIMMADOME

...

No wonder Crabrawler likes it so much.

do hoarder's ocd-ish symptoms get better or worse if you clean their house

ALOLA FORMS FOR EVERYONE!

cause there is this show called Hoarder SOS where they clean hoarders houses, and i get the feel that probably leaves them as nervous wrecks, lol

more space to store objects

Oh my god.
Charlotte was really just an exeggutor all along!

but all their objects have been taken from them

they find new ones to feel better again

hmmm

I get pretty mad when people clean my room without warning me, or getting my input.

This is a cute idea for a couples' lattes.

or in america, a single person getting two for themselves cuz they fat

move out of your parents house dude

consumerist world?
buy things?
put them in your house?

buy furnature? put a table in your living room?

it all adds up again?

luka's fount runs deep

I have friends who get mad at my organization method when they come over.

but why hoard if what you hoarded was replaceable

surely there is distress in losing your hoarded posessions

that's so inappropriate

wat?

I'm sticking Eggscalibur on my dropbox because it's just so great that I can't not share it.

I agree, but they only ever do it 'cause they know I'll let them get away with it.

inviting people i to your home is intimate

your home is where your underwear lives

they should respect boundaries

there is distress
the stuff you owned was yours
and now your things have been taken from you
they werent anyone elses
they exist, you can touch them, feel them, they are real, you own them...

That's the thing, Erin.
They do.

I just tend to have open boarders with most of my irl friends.

hmm

i operate on this policy: even if i don't have anything to hide, i might, you have no idea, so stay the fuck out of my shit

fucking this. I hate people going through my stuff. like when people just grab my phone out of my hand or whatever I have to bite my lip and hold down the urge to just smack them.

what if i had to use like suppository medication, or wear diapers, or use a catheter, or something else genital related that i'd be mortified if you found out about

you never know

stay the fuck away from my private property

myorning

when people borrow your phone, that is so fucking uncomfortable

lol stop touching poopp

yeah. I fucking hate it. I don't like people touching my stuff unless I say it's okay.

That's a fair policy to have, and it's one I assume everyone has.
I'm the weirdo in this case, and I know it.

But people find it refreshing that I try to keep an policy about being open.


Myorning.

vocaroo.com/i/s1AR2tdmO2OJ

saw it.

The only reason anyone has to ever touch any of my phones is if they're asking to roll and inordinate amount of dice.

Since I'm the only one with a dice roller.


Just checking.

whoah man wtf

neat

Whatever.

we generally don't let people in our house.
because we live like savages.
no joke


heya sunshine
watcha up to?

lol

fine wines and music

savage

I make it seem like I live like a savage so no one I don't know comes into my home.


Not much.
And yourself?

Trufax, I actually made my garage look like a cave.

That's a lie.

i wanna turn my back garden into like a rainforest feeling area with tall plants, and have a gazebo canopy to smonk weed under i comfort

OH MY GOD.
OH MY GOD IT'S SO GREAT.

i always imagined it with a small stream running through

...

we don't even lock the garden door
there's nothing worth stealing.


Just got out of bed.
really feeling like a shower first.
then some coffee etc.
and then I got no idea what to do.
but that's for then! imma smoothen out

I've always wanted a nice, big garden, with some rowans and willows, and a small stream running through a pond and across the garden.

Nnh.

if you name your child Saladin do they automatically become rich

This, holy shit. Some people need to learn boundaries.

saladin salazar
for it to work?

maybe i try it

give me attention

which is extra amusing considering how few boundaries I have about my actual self.

I see.
I need to laundry today.
For real this time.


Pets get boundaries?

friends used to keep trying to clean my room

i just threw things at them until they stopped

not only did this annoy them as things were being thrown at them, but the act of throwing things at them just got more shit on the floor so they realized they could not complete their task and would then give up

am i supposed to be listening for something?
._.

teach them of the pride of slytherin

i keep my living room pretty clean, so people tend to mess it up, nobody ever tries to clean it.

OH
that was my post??? ._.

neat

Yes. You're filthy.


I retract my pet agreement, I will be a free meme now.

I am what I am.

But then I can't give you pets.
Or scritches.
Or brushy brushy.

After getting to know you a little better I'd rather be the one doing that to you.

Why would you want to do something embarrassing like that!?

You ever stretch so hard it feels like you almost pulled something in your arm?

Because I think your reactions would be so adorable when forced out.

yes.

have you ever coughed or dry heaved so hard that your entire neck/shoulders/upper back area is sore like you just worked out a bunch?

Woah, what?

I once had a virus though, it made me not be able to keep anything in my stomach, that was really bad. Kept throwing up after every gulp of water even though there was nothing to throw up.
Did you ever get that kinda stuff, cups?

I have no idea what you're talking about.


No, I don't get sick, and I don't smoke or anything.

But I have stretched so hard that I couldn't hear myself, like, full on moaning right into Tokai's ear.

Sure you don't~
Anyway, your week been alright so far?

Daily reminder that life is never fair but you just have to keep on dreaming.

Preach it

...

Week's been alright, if boring.
Tomorrow my friends and I are supposed to go to the mall, so I can't put off my laundry another day.


Don't let your dreams just be dreams!

But my dreams defy the laws of the universe. ;~;

okay, it's kind of hard to explain this...basically I get this build up in my throat sometimes, especially in the morning. like, you know how sometimes you have to just hack up excess phlegm and spit it out? picture that, but it's like...you just can't fucking get it. and when you try, it makes you gag and dry heave, but you never actually vomit. it's pretty fucking horrible and sometimes the dry heave is so strong is like, throws out my entire upper body area.

I take heart burn medication for it. for some reason it works.

I only get a virus like that when I have the flu or whatever. it's almost never that bad. I usually can't even eat in the first place when I'm like that so I have less to throw up.


haha, nice. tokai must have liked that.


meh.

At least you were born in a 1st world country


gritty realism indie cinematic wolverine~

...

Get it?
First world.

'CAUSE WE'RE THE BEST IN THE WORLD.

'MURRICA!

By the way, Cupcake.
Go to gamestop to get a Volcanion.

Problems are relative.

oh shit. yeah I should do that. when does that end?

Kek, I still haven't done mine, been too lazy.
Doing it tomorrow for sure though. Not gonna skip another, out of clothes completely.
Enjoy your day at the mall though.


Holy shit cups that sounds so painful, so much worse than I imagined. Getting a dry throat is bad enough for me, kek.
Do you actually know what it is or what? Does it happen often?

Better not.
You can't land any hot dates if you have no clothes.

Day at the mall is tomorrow, not today! You're an entire 24 hours early!

I just dismantled my last deck of pokemon cards.
Now to make a new one.

Kinda wanna do a water/fighting.
But maybe not. Maybe Water/Grass/Dark?

Or Water/Fire?

there was no more underwear left so now I gotta wear lingerie all day

Where we're going, we don't need clothes!

Well I mean tomorrow! You know what I mean ( ._.)
Just going to hang out or...?
Actually I never asked, are you in school or do you work or what?

Mm
And don't think your problems aren't important, I didn't mean thaat
The problems and challenges you face are just as relevant to you as another person's are to them

Fun fact: Underwear is lingerie.


Yes, my friends and I are just going to hang out.

There's also a pokermans event at gamestop so we're going to get that free pokemon.

I'd prefer not to say, assume I'm a NEET.

but it doesn't function as well!

it's some weird thing. I have no idea. my dad has it too. it's genetic I guess. it's horrible but I dunno, I caught it early and the medicine I take helps a lot.


water/fire

So who's excited for the nintendo switch?
I know I am not considering that I am a poorfag living in a poorfag country

You should do your laundry too, bwaka bwaka.


I actually don't have many fire type pokemon now that I'm looking at it, so it'd just be the same deck just harder to use.

think talcing my legs will make my skin lovely and soft?

or will it do the opposite

our washingmachine's broke okayy
we gotta move some.. to a friend everytime.

try it out on a small part first

it smells like babies and i don't want my flat to smell of babies if i dont know it's worth it lol

...

it's like you deliberately set things up so you can tell me my suggestion is wrong even though it was one of the options.

try other stuff then.
I use scrub

I see what you mean but yeah I am thankful for a lot of the pleasures and freedoms in life I have.

I thought I'd had more than I did and it'd actually work, but I was wrong.

i'm not 100% sure a 23 year old who's house smells like babies is that amazing tbh

more kinda weird

or sea salt
then nourishing cream
and oil

I think it's less that it smells amazing than it is it can suppress odors.
I hear using it in shoes is brilliant.

As for using it on legs, as far as I know it should make them smoother, as long as you aren't allergic, but I've never done it myself.

My legs are perfect as they are.
Literally. Perfect.

see i has eczema pretty bad when i was little, and my skin still isn't perfect. i happen to have talc atm, so i'm toying with the notion, i'm just worried it will make things worse.

gonna take some poppers and think without thinking

What is up with your clock thing?

maybe after a bath. idk. this is so much more of a niggle on the mind than it should be, it's sucking all the fun from the thread. sorry.

Oh, in that case I wouldn't know.

ouch, alright then.
but hey if you do use it and it sucks.
a new thing learned

this bitch teeth fake, they glued on

It's a clock..? What's wrong with it?

thank you all for considering my leg skin with such interest and sincerity.

It's just white.

I don't know how to fix it.

SQUISH

What?

blop

...

Aw I see, the men on my Dad's side of the family sweat a bit more than average.
Glad you did, tho.


Alrighty. I got you dude.

:3

...

...

mornin' folks...

nope

Ohayo, friend!

how do motivate myself.

why not

a fire under your butt and a carrot on a stick

Woah...


you can play Skyrim on the Nintendo Switch?

is it a tablet?

is it a console?

woah...

or whichever other system standard greeting we chose not to communicate with today...

lol soup

nice job nintendo 👍

now i can play Pokemon Sun & Moon on my flatscreen!

:O

Tired.
Bored.
Feel like shit.
Want to stop.
Isolating.
Stressed.

they call it the switch cause when u see it u switch it off

no need to get a 3ds XL anymore!

the weirdest part of making a tourism commercial for Aleppo isn't that it's in a warzone.
but more that they're using game of thrones music.

Not much, about to play a game or two with some buddies since I'm done with school for the week. What's new with you?


What's happening fluffy?

maybe you should have a break instead then

nm, busy day... off tho. delayed by weather on various outdoor activities. im slacking pretty hardcore atp.

Can't break. Times running out.

Nintendo's new Console it a tablet 3DS hybrid
that you can play lotsa stuff on and take anywhere

oh nothing, nothing

Sorry.

...

hi sama

then you don't have much choice do ya
finish up or don't really.

hnnn... yea erin thats my shit right there

Stroke of luck, yes yes?
What activities do you get to not do?


Woah, I wonder if they'll release it here too.
I want to play super mario stuff.


Kek no worries.

if that new mario is real and not a tech demo i will cum everywhere

aiding a family member with a move also my daily exercise routine

Suffering

It's a nintendo console you can take anywhere!
and play the newest supermario cart with you Nintendo Switch buddies
split screen or head to head against ur buddies switch console!

play on NA

It's possible Theseius is even worse at explaining things than I am.

I'll wait until I can see the price tag.
Because that's really what determines how worf a system is.

@Ana
This is what she's talking about.

I wish! Then we could play doombots together.
That does awesome, I wish it comes here, maybe we can play together if we get it sometime.


Ah alright, hopefully all goes well and stuff.
What exercises you do?

walk, moderate cardio

lets play doom bots

what but I didn't even get the wii u yet
stop innovating things god

wii u sucks

but zelda

this is actually really sexy...

but why not just like yanno emulator on a tab with a bt controller

zelda's on the new one did you not just fucking watch the trailer

zelda on the switch now

hate the rate the console market moves at.

with phones, fair enough, you use them all the fucking time, a new phone every year or two is like a basic expense

but a console? i want AT LEAST five years out of it, and then ten more of it still being relevant, if not cutting edge.

Wii U only sucked because it was horribly marketed.

If they'd done a better job on it's release and given the Wii a natural death, then it'd be fine.


It's not that sexy.
It depends entirely on the price tag.

im not gonna buy new things
just saying zelda on wii u is nice

and the specs of it vs the tab and controller ive already purchased lol

newer better zelda on switch now

wii u is pointless, the wii was totally fine. wii is still in my mind the go-to nintendo home games console, switch is unlikely to change that.

it sucked because it was a gimmick console with the same gimmick the ds had

and i still considered the game cube relevant.

because mario sunshine and shit liek that

that game is always a top 10

Pretty much.

Their marketing made people think that Wii U was a peripheral for the Wii even.

Erin knows what's up.

luka im not buying the new thingys
the only time I get a console is when it's old and super cheap.

this

i bought my ex a wii u and i dont think i ever even saw it switched on

I only ever use mine because I literally have to to play Fatal Frame 5.

rain stopped

off i fuck...lates

ur missin' out
your behind
left in dust
by then they'll have built somethin' even newer and better then you'll have to wait for that....
-_- and then the vicious cycle continues...

Consoles are shit anyway.

at my current house i have an xbox 360 and it has never been switched on within these walls

why i must upgrade shit that sees so little use so often is beyond me

oh yeah excuse me for being too poor to afford all the new cool things day one.

...

there it is

My PS4 gets switched on maybe once a month.

Next month though.
Once I get FFXV don't expect me to exist until I've had my fill.

idk if i'd view this differently if i didn't have anhedonia making video games boring and pointless to me, but as it stands, i just could not justify a newer console.

is that fucking jeremy kyle

you fucking know it is :3

day 2
day 3
day 4
and so on

obviously he's your biological dad nakita, your teeth are totally fuck up in exactly the same way

luka you eat at a soup kitchen

where are you going to get money for a switch

...

I'll buy Luka a Switch just to be THAT guy.

yes
because those other days makes the amount of money in my bank change.

i'd buy a switch just to smash it on video and show luka if i wasn't convinced that somehow luka is actually going to manage to get one

Half my family is well off, so I could probably get one if I wanted it.

But I can't justify asking for it for any reason if the price tag is bullshit.


Are you at least gonna make him send you a jo video for it?

We know how Luka's going to get one.
Squash is going to get it for him just to be that guy.

...

Nope.

how many until it's 'good enough' ?

I hope 3560 days from now.

Assuming the console is 650$CAD like the WiiU was around launch, and a weekly income of 40$CAD without any expenditure.

114 days.

That's actually pretty decent for doing odd jobs while living at home.

two very conflicting answers from people who love each other!
._.

My answer was a math answer.
His answer was taking the piss out of your question because it's a stupid question.

so are tokai and rin dating?

that's nice.

that's lewd.

HOW IS THAT EVEN REMOTELY SEXUAL LET ALONE LEWD!?

I love being understood


thank you

...

peeing on stuff is naughty!
>_

THAT IS LITERALLY NOT WHAT THAT PHRASE MEANS.

literally

I used it correctly this time.
I'm literally a saint now.

litterly

Luka actively ignores turn of phrases.

Is it considered ironic that people use the word literally to mean figuratively?

If you thinking peeing on stuff is sexual instead of disgusting you're probably perverted to the bone.

No. New definition is also to add emphasis.

it literally wasn't really necessary in that sentence

using the word when it isn't necessary literally makes sentences read a little oddly

Erin, post dick.

I literally can't even.

#whitegirlproblems

Is it considered ironic that people use ironic to describe things that aren't irony?


No, Theseius.


Also basic logic.

Fair enough.

you CAN even

#whitegirlmotivation

Have you, like, ever tried to even, but you just, like, literally can't?
It's literally the worst thing ever.
Literally Hitler.

how ironic~

...

I think I'd let subtle pee on me if she wanted to

you're my pumpkin spice ❤️

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwe

that also sounds sweet ^^

I call him Daddy there occasionally so fair is fair~

Though I'm fairly certain you taste sweeter than him or even a PSL~

wanna know a game i miss playing

spyro: season of flame

spyro on the gba, and you have ice breath, and you gotta take back the dragon's flame, or something vaguely similar, the plot is t hugely important, the general loveliness of the game is.

aw gosh idk bout that, pic of him~? :3

Spiro: season of pickles

antimatter

I had this and it was great.

nonono I don't post pics of my irl peeps.

it was. the environments and the sound track made it a joy, absolutely lovely.


aww oki

To be honest.
They should have left the name as the Nintendo NX.

my friend just told me he wouldn't suck a dick for 1 billion.
not even 2 billion.

I think he might be gay

obvious repressed gay

...

Tokai, pls. You're in a safe space here.

remember to tell him that you told the internet what he said, and they unanimously said he's clearly gay.

he'll hate that.

been through so many similar situations with tokai recently, i have no idea how to make her believe it's fine to be herself, but atm, it's always "asking for a friend"

Even I'd suck dick for 1$ Billion.
Like, holy shit.

*sigh*

I dunno.

Don't expect me to suck it well, because I don't make a habit of putting phalli in my mouth, but I'd still give it a good slobbering.

It's not incredibly difficult

but rin ur a big homo u suck like pro for free

ikr


huh


he's not getting off the high horse it seems


im not trans!

It's not hard to suck a dick, but I imagine it takes practice to suck it well.


I m lik
da bigst slit hir.

Just don't use your teeth too much ;3

And I've been doing it for free like an asshole.

That's anal

lmao

Wait.
You're not supposed to bite it?


Joke's on you, niglet, I've been making my money by sucking rich dudes' dicks.

you know what they say about a little bite

imagine not knowing how to suck a cock

You ever, like, want some chicken nuggies, and there's a black dude at the counter, so you accidentally ask for chicken niggies?


"Do it harder you slut"?

So, I get it's called a blowjob.

That means I have to blow on it, right?

imagine not knowing how to suck a cock

let's go with that yeah

I actually dislike giving oral.

...

share pizza pls

That's from months ago.

I'm borrowing some money from one of my coworkers to make rent. Apparently I've got him "around my finger" which was weird to hear.

I'm not crazy about getting it.

Oh, I bring that up to make the point I can't get pizza.

nobody particularly likes giving oral

but you better be fucking good at it if you wanna make it in this world

I practice my fellatio on 'dogs.

As in, hot dogs.

...

what kind of fucking faggot doesnt like sucking cock?

this dude i know irl has been saying weird things of that ilk to me for months it's super uncomfortable

Lol lowbrow Squash joke, nice.

I'm never going to live that post down, am I?

Well, he hasn't himself said it. It was a comment Old man Bob (mutual coworker) said after I made him fetch me a PSL lol

life's like a blowjob
you never know how much is gonna come of it.

Saved.

...

life is like a box of chocolates

if you fat it's not gonna last so long

thankyou thankyou
im here all night

not actually, im watching a movie with family soon.

der untergang

Life is like a vacuum.
It sucks and blows.

If a girl comments on how her cats are warming up to you quickly when it usually never happens with anyone else is that like, an in?

yes

cats warming is metaphoric

you warm my pussy better than others

Well, I can see the blatant metaphor, and not to be a full-circle joke, but she means literally her cats.

Life is like a high-cost escort.
She looks nice, until you get in and realize you've contracted five different STDs.

I want out of this country and this shitty internet.

i feel sick and hungry at once

fuck this cruel world

didn't mean to link

all dem poppers, girlie

Is that to say you'd suck a dick for 1$ Billion?

Vacuums don't blow, Rin.
That is like the thing they are made to not do.

I'd do it for free.

haven't touched them today

felt prick sick off them last night, and woke up with a mad chemical burn lung type cough, but this sick is a whole new sick

ouchies x_x

Some have an exhaust, you know.

Not all are those fancy new magic ones that can just suck and suck and suck and suck.


But then how are you going to make that billion bucks?

I'll finish my degree and make it big in the world.
and give a little succ on the side.

I have to watch a movie about hitler soon and have dinner with my family but now my mind knows nothing but sucking dicks

Le cocklust only Hitler can cure lol

they're weird, they fuck your lungs way worse than they feel like they should. you'd thing it would burn your nose too, but no, the lungs take a pounding while your nose is still fine

...

What are you looking to do?


It's a well known fact that Hitler was a fan of the succ.

Well, you know, even Hitler had dinner with family in the bunker.

Glad I don't fuck around with that kinda stuff anymore~

I honestly wouldn't be surprised to start thinking about whats in hitler's pants

out of habit

ew why did I say that


bbl dinner

I'm going to be a Supervillian.
I just need to think of a good name.

Queen Succ

He's shaved his privates to be like his moustache.

The Succ Master

He had a piss fetish

The Succ Lord

I wonder if Hitler's pubes are a little toothbrush mustache over his peen.

The Dark Succ

they also feel very about-to-die-from-a-cardiac-event-ish. not a fan. but i'm not a fan of being stone cold sober all day either, so, eh.

Beat you to it.

Curse this connection.

I'm not a fan by any means either, just, like.. eh

Gonna shower. Hopefully that yellowjacket isn't still trapped in the bathroom x_x

But it needs to be a pun.

:x good luck be safe

Succubus.

Not sure if that mattered so much, I've got a pretty crappy interwebs and I'm downloading a game and watching Netflix at the same time.

Nailed it.

I was like
"I'm going to spell succubus wrong for the pun."
But then I realized that succubus is spelt with succ.

You better define crappy because I can't open a YouTube video above 144p with nothing else running on this connection.

Almost as if...
The succubus was intended to succ...

diamond :3

hi guys! owo

I mean.
Their job is to literally fuck men to death.

RIP, I get max 1.4mb/s down ever.
I mean, I could easily download everything faster with my phone's 4G, but that doesn't even work here, love the coverage.


Neat, I think I'll just stay where I am due to the fear of losing my current plat rank.

I flip-flipped him to death x_x scary mofo

Hey man, don't discriminate like that.
#notallsuccubi


Yeah, same here. But I only have a 1.5GB data cap per month, can't really do anything with it other than send messages/images.
Mine is between 100-300 kbps per second so sometimes I can do things. Today is one of the shitty days where everyone is awake and using the floor's router, slow as fuck.

i made a shallow bowl of mashed bazingas

...

No, it's true.
Succubi and Incubi are the same thing, and their genitals change to match the job they're trying to do.

So succubi fuck men, and incubi fuck women, and homosexuality isn't recognized by demons because fuck you.

I never understood the point of the caps at all, other than that they're crazy monetization scams.
I've downloaded 28.2GB today, and I've still got another 30GB to go.

What even game was he talking about?

the phantom smell ruined those bazingas.

they tasted like petrol.

i am so sick of my life

I have no clue. No clue betty

...

I was making a joke that not all of them are violent.


They are and it's fucking horrible. Especially over here where the prices are all controlled by one company that bribes the government to remain the sole holder. It's a really shitty situation.

RIP Lebanon, killed to death by ISP.

IED?????????????????

Nuclear IED.

All I ask is that you remember my name.

I mean.
You don't have to be raping someone to be claiming their soul through sex.

youtube.com/watch?v=VDvr08sCPOc

What if they want to get married and live a peaceful life devoid of sin?


Hey neat, I actually know this one!

...

RIP

Implicitly doesn't happen, but they probably try to find someone who accepts them even knowing they're a demon.

Alternatively they're stripped of demonship and made humans.

Or something. It's not really handled in mythology, so you can subscribe to whatever idea you like most.

Everyone knows it, mostly because of teenager years and sick game montage videos which all used that song.


RIP in pepperonis.

That's what I was doing.
In my world, demons are the good guys and the evil humans are the ones oppressing them by not allowing them to have rampant sex whenever they want.


Hey! That's me! I'm an everyone!
Finally. Now I'm not a nobody anymore.

So don't oppress them.

It would be horrifying to be everyone, or to even have a hivemind going on.

...

It's so cold my feet are aching.

i had no idea they made more than one film

Maybe you should put on a pair of wool socks?

...

I have

Afternoon, Moogy

Do you have a pair of normal socks under them?

hello

how are you

Negative

Doing well. Just got out of the shower and ready for the day :p

I had a most bizarre dream presumably because of all the Nyquil I drank. Ugh. How was your slumber?

the books were better

There's your problem.

why does no cunt ever list the resolution of the fucking display on the laptop theyre selling?

that's what i say when people ask me if i'm watching the olympics

woke up once because of the dog barking. but i cant complain too much.

are you working today

My room is all moved around now.

But there's no time!

my anus is moved arouhd

...

You have all the time, or you could alternatively get a blanket and wrap that around yourself and lift your feet off the ground.

HD LCD
16 million colors
Bright

Good point. I'll do that.

Professional sub-zero tips, and no, I don't mean that ice ninja guy, but yeah, you get it.

Ooh. Is it your dog or like a neighbor's?

Of course. Work work work.

Oh, hey, Theseius.
When'd you move out of Canada?

oh god

my dog yeah.

that is unfortunate

Wise words from the arctic warrior.

mewg post doggo

What

Oh. Ew.

Nah, not really. I'd rather be at work than home doing nothing so it's whatever.

That was a very luka-esque post.

please dont

let me get a photo

Thats fair.

Why

just give me the damn resolution you double nigger
aargh

real talk tho, do you think 14" 1600*900 will be decent enough to actually fucking work on? im skipping HP after the fucking disaster that was my last elitebook.

Actually today when I left to the city at morning the whole ground was frozen, like all of the grass was just white.
I can already hear the GoT winter memes coming.

i been meaning to torrent all the GoT

I cannot survive the cold.. it's just uncomfortable it hurts.

do it

gee, okay

holy shit, my unis local jobs ad service actually posted some fucking graduate jobs that arent in london or fucking scotland

doit fgt

Be glad you haven't done the things I have then.
Although I just love that scenery.

sure

its worth, then you can be in the club

shes kinda tired

What things? have you cuddled together with the other boys?

gotta get me some mass storage devices yo

also a macbook charger, if i want any hope of saving my macbook, i need a charger

i threw it out the upstairs window the other day

Yeh, thas a fine resolution though can be still frustrating sometimes.

scratch that, the first one was in york and the second one london
what the actual fuck are they even doing?

why


how so?

Hnnng

i've seen most of it but i was paying like zero attention and i have no idea what was happening the whole time

awwww ^^

Stood almost completely still in -30C for 4 hours guarding something pointless in heavy wind.

...

Oh you were like a military man, weren't you?

do not

she can be very crazy in the morning. like barking estacticly when she first sees me. need to pet her or shell bit my legs lol

QT, your'e dating Swords.
Sit down.

poops and giggles

lol, what a sweetie

youtube.com/watch?v=gmA6MrX81z4

yeah she cute

wat


im assuming theres a reason for this that isnt dumb?

I threw my ps2 out the upstairs window for s+g's back in the day.

Erin, we're not too different you and I

...

no

damn great watching hype

great minds think alike.

i mean, its not quite 1200p comfy, but ive gotta make do with something, and 800p is kinda a pain in the arse


gdi erin

...

entering maximum sleepiness overdrive

...

what possible not-dumb reason could there bee for throwing a laptop out of a window?

Yes, I mean winter's better for combat as you can just run around and do crazy dives/jumps as the snow/gear makes the landings so you don't really feel it.
To hell with guarding something though since it gets really cold even if you have 3 socks on and 2-3 pairs of gloves.

eat donuts and hot chocolate

I know that feel.

i know. expected as much

it might be completely and utterly fucked already

Be careful with all that power
It's not meant to be safely wielded by one person

That's SOOOO far away.

i knowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

na. needs a new OS from a bootable drive. maybe a new battery but i'm not entirely convinced that isn't also a software issue.

A year's really not all that long.

gdi erin

ur dicks not that long

I can handle


I wouldddd but maybe tomrorow too sleepy now


I lamostdid not manage to get up to brush tooth


I will bed now nananana

Good lol

Like how was that even supposed to be insulting?

it wasnt meant to be

oh

I learned to do it early so it wouldn't be so difficult when sleep sets in.

NEW

Hey, at least you'd never be alone.

basically i installed a beta of macOS sierra on it, and it started to die a terrible death of deaths, got so slow that the mouse lags even when booted into just system utilities, stopped letting the battery charge, just general degenerative illness ensued. so, need new install OS X el capitan from a bootable, because with the battery not charging the onboard clock is dead, and system utilities doesn't use internet time, so it can't pull a fresh version of Sierra because the SSL certificates seem not yet in date.

once it has el capitan, we can bring it back to life.