This week in autism

Man speedruns a goldeneye level and beats the world record by one second. CLUTCHNESS ensues.

Other urls found in this thread:

hooktube.com/watch?v=9BChZORabks
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

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someone post the webm

did you think that fag invented "This Week in X", because I didn't think it was possible to be this sheltered
you see there used to be a thing called television and

I thought Dam Agent was impossible to get 0:52.

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Was that a trap that entered the room and gave him head pats?

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Forgot to tag your post user, apologies.

Why even live.

boring tbh

Goose did a video on it around a year ago.

RNG grindfest speedruns are boring. Goldeneye sucks.

I guessed it before she came in the room.

He should have killed himself instantly on the stream rather than letting that pointless, meagre 'achievement' go to his head. Can you imagine the amount of wasted man hours dumb faggots have/are/are about to pour into this autismal repetitive futility just because this faggot has done this?

Yeah it's almost as pathetic as coming on a dead image board ran by a fat Jew to not talk about video games with a bunch of other social rejects.(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

If you replace "youtube" in the URL with "hooktube" it takes you to a viewable version of the video that doesn't give the video any views, and I don't think the site has ads (none with any sort of adblock for sure)

hooktube.com/watch?v=9BChZORabks

Holy autism. He's having an episode!

Meh.

Where else you gonna go fgt?

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Eurasian Master Race~

Dose are some ugly nips.

B A S E D

But you also get to not feel the emptiness and all consuming drive for your next high either.

Goose's last video was really good, the one about the Super Meat Boy speedrun World Record being a sham, and why you need standards and rules in order to have a community that is worth preserving.

agent is where the time was most optimized though, so it's massively impressive

there were over 100 people with the world record until he got the 52 because it's agent, people have been trying to do better than 53 for years now

15 YEARS
5

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The really sad part is that he wouldn't have been banned if he'd gotten those quints.

Is that why I got away with the gaynigger post?

where is the lie?

doing something right at least

While he's not wrong in reflecting on what he's doing, he's mistaken on one fairly important point. Endlessly grinding for world records in all possible missions in GoldenEye, a game already beyond autistically optimized, is to speedrunning what trying to chain jump ropes to infinity is to athletics. He's not just a simple, run-of-the-mill speedrunner, and he's certainly in no position to speak for that shit as a whole. He's on the most lunatic of fringes. But when I see anons rave of speedrunning as being the craziest thing in the world, I'm fairly convinced they genuinely think GoldenEye speedrunning is an accurate representation as a whole, when it's more TimeCube level insanity.

Mate you got some fucked priorities if you based on some 1/4 nog from britain who whines about Keremy Borden but praises the shit out of bernie.

This is fucking great

This is cringe

speedrunning is dumb as shit and this guy overreacted a bit but I guess it's cool that he beat a 15-year-old world record that everyone else thought couldn't be beat

Wow. I now understand that speedrunning is actually speediestrunning instead of merely speedrunning.

Yeah saw that too. What's worse is that she's ugly aswell or just not that good looking. I swear to god, i even have two neighbors living right next to each other who have chinks as girlfriends and those are horrific looking, even worse than this one on the vid.

Most women the world over are ugly though. Why do you think they try to ban waifus at every opportunity?

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST
Why the fuck is it that thee fucking shittiest game for one of the shittiest consoles brings out the biggest faggots in video games known to man kind.
Golden Eye is a fucking joke of a game.
The N64 outside of SM64 is a fucking joke of a system.
Why the fuck do they call themselves the Elite? they should be called "Total fucking faggots who overreact for the camera 24/7 and constantly talk shit about every other speed running community in existence". On top of that fucking autism, they have all at once in the past fucking cheated using splicing, everdrive cheats, and other fucking faggot methods to get some shit WR for a shit game. I fucking hate these faggots with a passion.


Fuck you, Hail Hitler, play a real fucking FPS.
Rant over, delete thread.

This guy is right. You banned him because he's right and he struck a nerve in your little beta minds. Most of you fucking losers still live with your parents and either don't work or work shitty minimum wage jobs. Maybe you should consider making a change in your life.

You're trying too hard to fit in here faggotron. Maybe you should go to Holla Forums, I heard they love le edgy contrarians over there you early 20's low-test, high-estrogen bitch boy.

SM64 is good, and OoT/Majoras mask are sub par, fuck off faggot. The gamecube did everything better.

Except sell.

Normalfags don't buy good video games.

17 year old detected.

She will be soon enough.

Hope diabetes gets your legs sawed off you fat fucking kike.

Might want to take of those faggot glasses there bud.

I like that something that was found out to be possible after 15 years of wondering. That would be exciting to all who cared, so I am happy for them. But, wow, speedrunning doesn't look very fun at all and it seems even more of throwing away time that regular vidya playing.

Those the glasses that let you see hidden faggots? Like the glasses in They Live?

Depends on the game, but yes, mastering a video game and being able to beat it quick and effectively is not enough for some faggots.

You're a fucking joke, i bet you're not even white. You're probably a fucking shitskin who still lives with his parents or maybe you're a little kid in college majoring in some liberal arts faggotry. Or maybe you fell for the STEM meme who knows. The point is you're an insecure young faggot who thinks he will impress others on an anonymous imageboard with his "cool contrarian tastes".

"Everybody loves OoT so if I say the game is shit, that will make me stand out". You're a fucking loser with no confidence whatsoever. See that's the problem with this faggot board, is that its filled with fucking virgin underage losers like yourself who don't know shit about real life or video games. OoT was considered to be the best video game ever when it came out in the late 90's. My own father, who doesn't give a flying fuck, about video games said he'd read about the game in several popular magazines (and I'm not talking about "gayming magazines" which didn't really exist back then either, except for Nintendo Power maybe).

Your taste in video games is complete shit and you have no idea what you're talking about you gay ass little bitch. I just can't wait till little faggots like you grow up and get fucked in the ass by life because you suck, you're a genetic dead end, your parents wish they would've worn a condom and no one will miss you when you die. Saying Majora's Mask is subpar because you didn't like it might have been acceptable but calling OoT less than average is beyond ridiculous. Grow the fuck up and get some taste you absolute fucking pleb. I'm honestly curious as to how old the average user on this board and website in general is. I myself am 27 years old and I feel like most of the people I am talking to here are either in their early 20's or even younger than that. Maybe I should stop browsing this fucking place honestly, I feel like this is a complete waste of time. Only reason I can't stop browsing this fucking shithole is because the rest of the internet is pozzed beyond belief and there is almost no point in browsing anywhere else.

The internet is dead. Imageboards died years ago.

Listen you, I know the full history of imageboards, I study where memes originate from and how and where they spread, I track where anons go and know them by writing style and the filenames the use on images they upload and the topics they prefer. I track topics. I don't usually start but I do read countless of the survey threads. I apply advanced analytics, cognitive techniques, and fact-checking to discern a great many things from the posts of anons. I know many different imageboards and what sort of cultural exchanges are happening, when anons are using multiple boards and how frequently, etc. I have been doing this all for a decade now and I work/network with some other anons who do this too. I know so much of the history of these places and I / my group has often been right about future developments well in advance of them taking off. I know the various moderators for different boards, the power exchanges, the dramas, who replaced who, etc.
I know my shit, so don't think you can post this 'Imageboards died years ago' trash and get away with it.

Is that you zfg? or goose? is your dead mother not enough? kill yourself as well you useless piece of shit.
This better be what it is.

Fuck off CIA nigger.

Those are all boys, aren't they?

Every time I read a post like this I thank God for not making me such an insufferable faggot autist and instead just a kinda bearable one.

at least anthony burch isnt you, kek

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Holla Forums never fails to amuse.

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Nice blogpost faggot. You could've baited way more with less existential angst, but go ahead and leave. You won't be missed.

Learn to reading comprehension fucking low-class public school scum.

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You should probably take your own advice on this one.

:)

obama go

You post here too, faggot. What does that say about you?
Have fun being the most alpha log in the toilet bowl.

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I think it merely makes him more self-aware than you, none of that alpha-beta crap matters you monkey.

GE would be good as a PC game. I used to play GE and like it since this was before I had played any FPS on PC, but going back to GE it's totally unplayable because of the shitty controller and the whole thing is just undermined by the limitations of it being on consoles. GE actually has some pretty cool enemy AI and game mechanics that could make it a good game if it was a PC game instead.

For example compare the way that the enemies act in GE compared to how they act in quake or half-life: GE enemies will do all sorts of things like jumping, dodge roll, crouching, and other shit to make the game more interesting while something like the HL1 soldiers just stand there and then shoot you if they see you, and nobody reacts to getting shot. In GE they have unique animations for pain based on what body part you hit them in, and they can wear helmets that you can't shoot through at all. You can also shoot the grenades out of their hands. The whole thing makes them act so much more life like than other shooters, but then it's all undermined by the shitty platform. Or, the way that the stealth system works is also really advanced and cool, with the security cameras and alarms. It's a much more advanced game trying to break out of it's shitty controls and when people who played it when it came out try and remember it, they only remember the good parts and not how it's totally unplayable, which makes it seem like the best game ever.

Other than that, your post is right.

There's a 60fps + M/KB injector pack for the game, it's certainly more playable but then it's almost way too easy probably could correct it via GS code to affect enemy accuracy), same deal with PD and in a lesser way TS

I know, but the whole game needs to be redesigned for PC, not just ported. The reason that FPS games can only be good if they are PC exclusives is because porting it to console requires you to undermine the gameplay.

GE's enemy AI and stealth needs to be combined with the unrestricted skill ceiling that arena shooters are capable of. The answer isn't to increase the enemy accuracy (you can already do this with 007 mode) but to increase the enemy heath and give the enemies more attacks, and change how the levels work so that more enemies can engage the player.

GE was capable of much more difficult level design than what it presented the player, and levels like Aztec are like this window into what GE could be. But you can tell that they had to hold back so much to make it beatable. Imagine how insane the levels could be, when you think of a game where Aztec on 00 agent is one of the earlier levels.

It's crazy how, as shitty as Goldeneye is, it still introduced a shit ton of TECHNOLOGY that to this day is not replicated in many shooters. Tragic stuff.

one day user…

Of the little you can play of it TS2 seem to handle a straight transition to PC pretty well so it's certainly true that you could get GE to become much better with tweaks, maybe not even particularly major ones.

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SHUT IT DOWN
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Eh, probably not. Whenever someone says "late 90s shooter" they immediately think of Quake or Unreal. Or rather, they think of Hard Reset with a faux retro skin and a cutscene kill button if modern developers are to be believed

The only true way to bring goldeneye to the PC is to do a port of the engine based on the ROM, or a port to another engine while rewriting the game-play code into C from the ROM and translating the assets into formats that the engine understands. You will also have to gut the physics and rewrite it, everything…

And you're a queer. Stop blogposting and you cunt. The board is shit and you rambling about your angst does not elevate it.

Speedrunning is taking something made with love and care, and then slowly breaking it down into its basic components, turning it into something cheap and disgusting to you. All out of a masochistic obsession with having something that doesn't matter to anyone and wont be attributed to you at all outside of your internet persona which means nothing even for an e-celeb. You're not improving yourself from it and you are not even enjoying yourself. Most people don't even get a record.

Luckily autists like this exist though to replay some shit hundreds of times so I can go "thats neat" when I accidentally click on their recommended video on youtube though.

Wait, what the fuck?
Karl Jobst actually did it, Dam 52?

Is this the thread to complain about speedrunning?
It's fun to see that fag overwhelm everybody with his puzzle game skills.

Maybe you're the one that has autism. Speedrunning is a very niche genre with a low amount of people following it, if you're pissed off that these people made their hobby a money making job then it is you that is the problem.

Most people don't even consider going for a record, and they are enjoying themselves, contrary to what you're asserting. Speedrunning is nothing but a form of challenge run shared with a community. If you watched any speedrunning competition, you would know this. Record-seeking is in the minority. It has to be by nature.

Get fucked you hyper ADHD faggots.

It's been around 4 years since I've seen a GDQ, what happened in 2017?

Nothing interesting

Ocarina Of Time is a good game, a great game even. But the best game ever? Nah

Let me explain something to you.

No

rip user

oh shit. is the autistic kid that hate speedrunner now being edgy
have you ever done your game to piss of speed runner or you are just looking for attention again?

Bait of such supreme quality it triggered the BO. Bask in its glory.
the fact its true word for word is just the icing

why live

Man, One's art has improved a lot

It checks out.

i can't bellieve the cake eating jew b& him for speaking the truth, struck a nerve there huh?

Jokes on you dubsman I don't work :^)

i really wish mark would die of a heart attack and fuck off from Holla Forums forever

Could you tell me what those things are?
Honest question, I've never played the game.

ban the normalfags
imageboard war now

You can shoot guns out of enemy hands for one.

Singapore is something else.

YouTube still gets a view out of it, and Hooktube just gets access to the same data you don't want YouTube to have.
Also, that user was asking for a specific webm about speedrunning, which you'd know if you weren't a newfag that thinks hooktube isn't a meme.

I'm watching it now. I think the idea behind what he's saying is there (we all saw what happened to 4chan), but he literally says "if you're fine with people playing games how they want, then you're obviously okay with them cheating." I can't even begin to believe he's making any argument or having any conversation in good faith when he says something so fundamentally illogical. I'm honestly trying to think about how anyone could say or think that, and all I feel is a headache.


at_least_bait_the_hook.jpeg_LARGE

I think what he was trying to say is "If you just let people 'play them game how they want' and dont set any standards then how do you prevent people from cheating".

The point he was making was that if the Super Meat Boy speedrunning community didn't set the standard that all speedrun attempts have to be recorded with a capture card and at a high FPS than they never would have caught the guy with the world record cheating.

If the community just wants "lets every be, and be open and inclusive" then in turn your being inclusive to cheaters who used a flip phone video to record his gameplay and spliced it together with a pirated copy of Sony Vegas.

I get that, but his statements about "some people want to speedrun for a living, some for a dedicated competition" and his history with speedrunning are clear indicators he's completely disconnected from how the rest of us actually play video games.

Obviously competitors should be held to standards, because that's the whole point of competition. The guy playing Super Mario Odyssey wasn't holding himself to that standard, though: he wanted to go fast in SMO and beat a world record doing it. If he cared, he would have uploaded it. Awful example.

If the community is the kind of small, low-stakes environment where anything goes then that inherently makes cheating less appealing in the same way an image board makes lying less appealing than a place like reddit where posters are literally graded on the "quality" of their comments. There are bound to be shitheads who want to be the big fish in small ponds, but if the ponds are small then they are, by definition, less likely to attract enough people to have one of those shitheads in the first place.

Play any console shooter, any console shooter. Look how retarded and easymode the AI is because it's designed for shit controllers with gooftarded aiming. GE is terrible as a PC game

You just jealous because you don't have any clutchness

I played through it for the first time with that 60FPS + mouse/keyboard hack and while it's much, much easier with this control scheme (I'm guessing, because I had little trouble beating anything before Egypt), I thought it was a genuinely good game that holds up today and felt very different than any other FPS I've played. My favorite aspect is that the each level has objectives but you aren't really told how to complete them. There's no waypoints and no harpy screaming in your ear and holding your hand the entire way, you're just dumped into the level and expected to figure out what to do yourself. It feels like a more sophisticated version of classic id level design.

Definitely give Perfect Dark a chance (with the hacks) if you haven't already. It's harder (I think it unintentionally compensates for the control scheme on PC by making guards react faster with the increased framerate) and crams in even more TECHNOLOGY and nonlinear level designs. And of course don't watch speedruns until you've beaten levels, half the fun is trying to figure the level out yourself.

I did a speedrun race in front of people and got really nervous, sperged out and DNF'ed twice in a row.

Speedrunning is for faggots, kill them all. I fucking hate these little inbred morons. Might as well call it "ADHD Lets Plays". TAS I understand, they are interesting and make sense. But these little shits think they have one up on people cause they can beat a game 5 minutes faster then someone who is just simply good at the game.
I WAS GUILTY OF THIS
I use to speed run Zelda II and Megaman X, even had records. I stopped though cause guess what, you aren't a hobbyist or a video game player anymore, you are faggot with a mental disorder. I even broke the faggot mentality by playing OTHER FUCKING VIDEO GAMES.
Anyways, get fucked to all the speedrunners. If you died tomorrow no one would give a shit about you or your records.

Its the absolute peak of human ability.

Illiterate damage control.

(((Human)))