Current Year Journalists

They will probably call this the Dark Souls of side scrollers or something.

Because they don't actually play games.

wtf

I think he got really nervous after he messed up one or two more times, I feel bad for him.

Holy fuck, these people hold the keys to our kingdom and they are literally fucking brain damaged.

I kinda feel for DSP now, he isn`t as retarded as I initially believed. Grown men with compromised motor functions are apparently a thing.

But I shouldn't feel bad as those journos want to cut my funds and assault me for what I believe in, so screw them.

Is that Bill Murray's retarded son?

This game looks really basic and boring.

Dean Takahashi from VentureBeat, actually.
deepfreeze.it/journo.php?j=dean_takahashi

Though despite Dean being garbage at this game I am extremely thankful the game is on GOG. This is one of two games this whole year that I've been really wanting to play, and I really don't want it being bogged down by Denuvo bullshit.

The selling point is more the artstyle than the gameplay I think.

Say what you will, at least DSP tried to use the barrel and the crate in order to do the jump.

Why is anyone getting a review copy at this point anyway? It's not supposed to come out for like four weeks.

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Gamescom demo

G…Guys, i'm coming at this thing out of context, so I have to ask, how exactly do you get across that gap? I assumed you platform the pipes but it looks like invisible walls are stopping him.

pls no bully

lol, what a bugged game

He doesn't know how to crouch jump is his issue.

play the tutorial, you'll learn
crouch jump. the invisible walls are actually your legs, so you have to pull them out of the way while in the air

I just felt laughing Okada was appropriate.

It's okay, you just press space bar, then ctrl to reach high platforms in source games like Counter Strike.

Also, am I the only one that feels like Cuphead is turning out to be not as great as it was going to be? Visually, I think it captures of the feel of the old timey cartoons but everything else looks like average side scroller run-and-gun design with nothing new to the table.

I'm basing this off the gamescom gameplay videos and its looking pretty average. Bosses seem simple and mostly stationary. Level design seems about as straight forward and not as involved. Enemy placement seems sparse that you'll hardly feel challenged.

This might change with later levels but the more I see of Cuphead, the less I'm excited I am for the game. It just seems like they put all of their work into visuals and nothing into gameplay.

Also, a minor thing to mention. This looks like it might get annoying after a while but the explosion cloud when you kill an enemy is really huge. I could see this getting very bad if there is a large amount of enemies on screen, which might explain the spacing of enemy placement and it feeling empty at times. I hope its good but I'm doubting it the more gameplay I see of it.

HOLY CHRIST ALMIGHTY

THE INSTRUCTIONS ARE RIGHT ON THE FUCKING SCREEN

Words fail me.

Is this an early stage of a neural network playing the game?

I… hate myself for it, but I think I want to watch his full playthrough now. Trainwreck syndrome has set in hard.

That's just embarrassing.

Of course it's going to be shit. They would not have to hype it so hard if it was any good.

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How in the fuck?
And people ask why videogames have become so easy, this is the level of retardation that publishers and many developers want to appeal to.

Okay gives us a name OP. Which "journalist" did this?

This is the least hyped game on the main stage in years.

Just… How? Are these people even alive?

Shoot up
SHOOT
UP

I think a better question is why.
Why would you pursue a career in games if you are so unbelievably bad at them?

For shame.

These journalist fuckers are worse than Mark.

Journalism confirmed for worse disease than Judaism.

Hard to top 12 game overs in one of the easiest games ever.

Thanks. I've been waiting.

The boss battles are the meat of the game. I think the sidescrolling stages were thrown in as an afterthought, to break up the pacing. They don't look too bad though. Just like a very basic Contra.

Because you couldn't make it as a real journalist.

You don't have to "think" that, it's confirmed that they weren't added in until way later in development.

The hype is mostly due to the visuals. It looks nice and different to some extent but in a sea of shit, this is not hard nor surprising.

ooh here let me write a blog post headline defending this- Skill based "merit" design is promoted by alt-right gamergaters to systematically gatekeep "their" hobby, ie exclude others deemed "unworth". Why can't these trolls embrace that games are for EVERYONE, not just basement dwelling losers who can't stomach a little diversity??

12 GAME OVERS

I came here to say this

I understand why Mark bought Overwatch now.

9/10 - IGN

Would make a perfect headline.

You guys don't get it, it was all a social experiment you see

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Shit man, you called it

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He actually did it, the absolute madman.

Also I'm going to self check my quints ID because that's just a special occurrence

You can't make this shit up.

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I was pretty awful at Metal Slug the first time I played it, which is a similar style of vidya, but I was never this fucking bad and Metal Slug is hard as balls.

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well. fuck.

So the world really needs to be broken down to the lowest common denominator in even the most trivial instances. what a shitty, corrosive philosophy for losers.

id checked

i want this man to suffer

HAH, HIT FUCKING GOOD, FAGGOT

Holy fuck, this more than just fucking "Lol, you can't play HARDCORE vidya" This is fucking basic 3 year old reasoning. Even if someone didn't know how to play that game, they should have figured it out after like 3 tries. Maybe if you had a hand disease or something that it could be excusable, but if that was the case you shouldn't be showcasing games in the first place. It's like having someone who doesn't know how to drive be a stunt driver.
And holy shit does that comment piss me off.

This is the world we live in now. Welcome to the Current Year New Age.

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day of the rope against video game journalists when?

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The mix of low-t and lack of honest, with additional retardation.

You know, this all reminds me of the rhetoric that eviscerated the field of painting. Classical rendering is bourgeois, the subject matter is meant to deceive and divide, so paint meaningless garbage instead! I swear to god, these adult babies are going to be complaining Shakespeare is awful because they can't understand it.

Can you imagine how neat it would be to not live in a cultural decline?

Actually yes, if you are a hotel owner and want to build a swimming pool, you must have an elevator for disabled people to use the swimming pool, otherwise they will close it down, even if no disabled person will ever visit your hotel.
ada.gov/qa_existingpools_titleIII.htm

Here is another article, about a stripper club that had a shower room, in which the stripper would take a shower and be viewed by the customers. To reach the room, the stripper had to climb a ledge about five feet above the floor, however it was impossible for disabled strippers to do, so they had to close it down. I do have to wonder how many disabled strippers exist in America, for such a thing to even matter.
archive.is/6z2Rc
articles.latimes.com/1994-05-05/local/me-53874_1_odd-ball-cabaret

This isn't even a case of lacking experience. I'm fairly certain I was better than this the first time I ever touched a platformer. He fails tasks that are so basic, so intuitive, it makes me wonder if he actually is a little retarded.
This isn't like someone failing to become a pro sports star right out the gate. This is like someone failing to pick up a ball, repeatedly, for a minute and a half.

Why is it all the people who get to play games early are the shittiest players?

A few years ago I'd have told you

But at this point I have no fucking clue

They were trained to write well, failed at it, and got scooped up by a profession with very low standards.

Excellent analogy

He clearly states he wasnt playing badly on purpose but rather is total shit at the game.
80% of the people in here incapable of reading comprehension or something?

The dude clearly tried to make the point that this is a social experiment to downplay how fucking shitty he is.
Just because he mentioned he wasn't playing badly on purpose because people thought he was trolling doesn't mean anything when you read the rest of the post.

Apparently the video was posted because it's an interesting research in comments or difficulty in video games or some shit

How hard it's to say "well yeah, I suck"?

WHY WOULD YOU EXPECT ANYTHING LIKE MARIO FROM A SHOOTER

Connections.

What the fuck is wrong with these people? Is social media actually making people retarded? And I mean in literal, medical, cognitive reasoning is severely impaired, kind of retarded? Holy shit.

Phil is just as retarded if not more retarded than however retarded you initially thought he was.

He doesnt expresly say it was made with the purpose of being a social experiment either, just says that it does work as one.
But then again I wouldnt put it past these faggots to do that just so they can act like a victim afterwards.

This has to be it, I cant believe anyone is this bad at something this simple. Its like a grown man failing pic related. He should get a brain scan

Because then he'd be out of a job. Why should people listen to a guy who is god awful at the basics, like jumping in a 2D platformer? As far as I'm concerned his opinion on video games is as valuable as a random schlub on the street.
I can guarantee you that every single person here could go into Cuphead and do that shit at most on their second go. Except our resident Mr. 12 Times.

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First thing on the way to improve is to admit there's room for it.

Notice that tutorial is literally written in large letters in the background

I've been to Japan and UAE, very nice.

he took a minute and 26 seconds to follow a basic instruction, that wall of tl;dr is proof that he's comprehends English
He played like a fucking vegetable
Lousy play is picking up a fighting game and mashing buttons randomly,
picking up black jack and fucking up on 17's, to go with that analogy he plays like holding on 5 and hitting up to 40

Man I really am fucking excited for this game. Only release in a while I've been genuinely looking forward to

This one's better

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You know what that means right?

(Nice ID)
Jesus Christ, that's pathetic. I'm actually angry for the first time in a good while reading something retarded. I could laugh off the way he showcased how he's completely brain-dead, but trying to justify it and trying his damnedest to blame the game for it because "it didn't warn me" despite barely getting through the tutorial is inexcusable. The sheer inability to admit he's terrible is absolute rage fuel.
I actually want to tell this faggot to shut the fuck up and kill himself. Not because he's shit at the game, but because he's human garbage that can't admit to being shit and trying to blame others for it and attempting in the most pathetic passive-aggressive way imaginable to lower overall standards because he just can't stand that he's shit and can't git gud.

Fuck. There is something seriously wrong with these people.

salt party?

In all honesty I think that moving away from bossrush to having levels between them might not work out because said levels will probably be the weakest part of the game and really drag things out. Who knows though at this point, they might have come up with some really good levels

It's gonna be shit since they're gonna tone down the difficulty for braindead people? Yeah, I know but let me have this. Now is not the time for disappointment.

That comes later

I would say this is some DSP level gameplay, but even phill would figure out how to get over that pillar in less time then that.

go home (((9volt)))

Is this polygon? Fucker can't even read, and you know he forgot how to dash since he only jumped and ducked in the second vid.

There are blind people that are good at fighting games, and here you are taking a minute and a half to jump over a pillar, even with instructions plastered right onto the screen. God damn, I despise these people. I just don't understand why they bother taking a job involving playing video games when they clearly don't give a shit about them.

Venture beat

that looks like black donald trump

Do you even know who that is?

Checks out

Some of the sound effects and visual effects feel off. Like when enemies are killed they leave behind this massive cloud and while it looks nice I kind of dislike the amount of smoke there is on every one of Cuphead's actions.

who

Even Dunkey can't figure out that holding the jump button longer lets him go farther so he stops falling off the damn bridge in Crash Bandicoot. The death of platformers has shown its effects in the gaming population of the modern era.

Not that guy, but enlighten me.

Is Dunkey really a metric for anything? The dude thinks DMC3 is "what the fuck" in terms of difficulty.

That guy legitimately talks like he has downs or something.

It's Erik Estrada, from Chips. He's Puerto Rican.

You say like that anything more should be expected of ecelebs.

The old Chips or the (((Chips))) movie?

He's a metric for someone that is at least an average gamer, that isn't completely brain dead retarded like game journos. But his inability to hold jump means that the concept in general has been completely absent from gaming for at least a decade, and it shows.

A liberal can never be wrong. They can never admit to others–or even just themselves–that they have ever made a mistake. Liberalism is ALWAYS true, and MUST always be true, otherwise the foundation of their worldview–moral relativism–is shattered and they are forced to experience negative feelings.

Once you understand this, you understand how the world works. They are neurological toddlers.

He's Anti-Trump if that puts any pieces together for you.

Old Chips.

Just because someone doesn't consider trump the savior of mankind doesn't mean they're anti trump or pro-something else

COOKIE

Most hilarious of liberalism is

IIRC he tweeted something calling Hillary supporters retards and Trump supporters even bigger retards

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My point exactly

Are you dense? That makes him anti-Trump

Looking forward to the game

shigg it to the digg it.

For thinking everybody's a retard?
Have you seen the path leading to the election?

sage for off topic

Why are all the top tiers ugly whores

What in the fuck is wrong with you.

To get replies

But note how he call both retards yet Trump supporters are more retarded for some reason. Also, don't derail the thread faggots

????

I like how calling voters retards automatically puts him in the same category as #notmypresident and antifa
Imma stop here cause this is a good thread and don't want to derail it

How does someone manage to be this fucking retarded?

I don't like getting political because it completely ruins threads, but it's pretty ridiculous to read shit like this then see people get lambasted for not believing that Trump is the Messiah in the same thread.

saying everyone's a retard has the same intellectual content as a wet fart. if he's so anally devastated with the choices, maybe he should start with substantive criticism not petty sniping. strutting around saying "ur retarded"
does nothing to change anything and only makes you look like a pretentious cockhound.

just stop

That's not what I'm implying you obtuse fucking faggot. How is someone not anti-whatever if they're against all fucking options? That makes no logical sense. That's like saying one guy is okay with both parties because he hates all of them, or just likes one party because he hates them all equally.

Better yet he can have his opinions but at the very least he can make them entertaining instead of smug. That's what I hate about most humor when it's mixed with politics, it stops being about humor and more about making yourself out as being the intellectual god while everyone else is beneath you for even considering an alternate opinion. And then all the "jokes" end up feeling like something a 12 year old messages you when you kick his ass in a game rather than an actual joke with the primary purpose to entertain rather than whatever.

To this day I will never forget how much this shit made me hate the current state of humanity.

>>>Holla Forums

HMMMMMMMM

I see nothing wrong here. Now let's discuss the irredeemable nature of taking too many scoops.

I've seen a blind guy play legend of zelda: ocarina of time better than this fag with both eyes follow on-screen instructions in the tutorial level of a platformer
there is no excuse for this

I wonder who have the lower IQs, vidya journos or Twitter verified?

Watched the OPs second wem again and really tried to understand what is going on in the brain of that poor guy. I noticed that there is weird twitching left and right all the time. It's like there is no connection between his actions and what is going on on the screen.
Seriously it looked like how a shitty AI learns games. AIs don't "understand" what is going on and just input what ever until something gets the target numbers go higher in the programmed logic. Scary shit.
This has to be a ruse. I'm unwilling to believe that things have gone this bad.

Liberal or not, I would be more worried that these literal retards might unknowingly hurt themselves or others.

Because their goal is to make vidya kosher and games to give the "right" message. They don't care about the games, just that the games serve to further brainwash the populace.

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You realize that those who do so are ideologically liberal, right? That behavior is inherently liberalistic. A conservative/traditionalist doesn’t fall to human idol worship. Even “Hitler did nothing wrong!” is a MEME, user.

What do you think the last 70 years of economic, social, and governmental policy has BEEN, user? Purposeful harm to others under this ideological umbrella.

But isnt the thing the baby does more a complex line of thought? I could totally see crows being smarter than babbys

If I was paranoid then I'd believe this is one of the signs that emojis are to become newspeak.
Let not meme this.

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Crows and most corvids -are- smarter than babies. I think they have problem solving capabilities comparable to a 3-4 year old or something. They're really clever birds.

Emojis and Texting are the self-inflicted consequence of social media, mass communication, and promoting negro culture in the main stream.

Birds like that do have good problem solving, but the thing about the baby is that technically he still solved the problem. The problem was "get object inside container" and he accomplished that goal, just via an alternative method. Humans think outside the box, and that can be a powerful thing.

He's a retard who can't listen to tutorials, but he didn't let that stop him. I'm actually impressed at his persistence.

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I don't understand, is this someone trying to meme? Is this mark's, by any chance?

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How likely is it that they pick people based on their inability to play videogames?

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:^)

I think they're all just retarded and never actually play any games. Polygon got massively asshurt when people laughed at their Doom video.

xD upboated my man

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Conservatism operates on moral absolutism you absolute retard.
There are solid, tested rules which make civilization work.
Nice plebbit spacing and 3/10 for making me reply.

Game journos crying about difficulty in games and sucking at them is pathetic. Nobody expects them to play at competitive tournament level they just have to be able to play at a decent competent level which comes naturally after playing for a while. It's not about gaming cred and more about having some work ethics, be competent at your job for fucks sake.

What part about dying repeatedly over and over again in a sonic game dont you understand?

Lil bitch.

I dunno dude. Emoji one piece of a weird infantilization of language that is bad enough to be visible everywhere. Communicating in stock phrases and slogans has to stunt thinking. I can't even adult lol

I hope someone makes a video of 12 year old who never played video games clearing the tutorial and first level like that infamous iJustine Portal 2 playthrough. Does anyone have the video of the 12 year old girl playing Portal 2 vs the iJustine comparison playthrough?

Maybe they don't play games because IT DOESN'T INTEREST THEM, no matter how easy the game is they won't ever play a game (unless it's for free on a phone or social media). Even Nintendo brought up this point at E3 2009, when it comes to playing video games there a 3 groups.

Is this guy 12?

My favorite argument is that you can only be bad at games.
No you can't, there are people who covered Starship Troopers that to this day think it's a pro-war movie.

This is what happens when games start ditching manuals. People expect that one control scheme or one set of game mechanics applies to multiple if not all games within a genre.
The right mindset is to play like Mega Man, but he may have never actually played Mega Man like most modern "gamers".

Please let there be a planet that crashes into us on the 23rd

Pull a couple of these. The entire comments section is full of people calling him a fucking idiot. I imagine the only likes on the video are from people who want to save the video for later.

Everyday we get closer to Harrison Burgeron.

I don't get this mindset either. I haven't followed Cuphead very closely, but I still got the impression that it was a difficult shooter. Nothing even close to Mario.

If you are not at least adept at video games you should not be in the business of reviewing them, period.

I was inspired.

what did he mean by this?

nani?

Forgot to edit out a couple of things.
I've been working on converting this fucking video for over an hour now, why the fuck can't anything just work? I feel like the guy I was trying to portray in the video.

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I want your hand to jerk my cock furiously until I shoot thick strings of cum all over your pale face.

Jesus christ this can't be a grown up man playing videogames, how do these guys get a job at these journo sites? i consider myself good at vydia they should hire me to so a shitty hobby not this mentally handicapped faggot.

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It's been done before, and better, but it's not a complete waste. 6/10 OC

You not talking like an effeminate cuckboi is precisely the reason they won't hire you.

And these people have the audacity to act all high and mighty, anywhere else they would have lost their job and got told to fuck off. Truly amazing

You're giving him too much credit. He's American with presumably Nippon-born parents.

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Humerous

I guess inspired wasn't the right word. "I felt an urge to do something fast and stupid" would have fit more.
If I were to put any effort into it, I would've covered the box with Cuphead artwork and either play a pre-recorded commentary or expressed my frustration at the end with an overly worded review.

No it's not. It's more complex but definitely not harder.

Please stop shilling your video every single chance you get

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Oh hi Mark 12 GAME OVERS

Surely this is one of those AIs programmed to learn how to play video games.
right?

Based on the level design we've seen so far I'd disagree.

Likely this and also a vector to disseminate your ideology through. Which has led to the whole push of "you shouldn't have to be good at games to properly review them" and "the 'gitgud' meme needs to die" notions (embed and archive link archive.fo/sXPDx related, albeit from polyshit). Or trying to make excuses to justify playing like horseshit like the image in .

Apparently wanting people that are actually good at and interested in/fans of a game/series to be able to provide adequate gameplay and know what readers would put the weight on in a review (can vary by genre) is too much to ask of the current crop of big-name sites.

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I hate the dash button being directly above the jump button.

This can't be real.

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You mean games that are shilled and played up everywhere online just because it uses some nostalgia-bait aesthetic tend to suck shit? Wow, next thing you're going to tell me is indie pixelshit games that use hipster versions of atari art are bad.

(id quints checked)
Isn't there a copypasta or screencapped post somewhere about "social experiment" being used as an excuse for anything that doesn't necessarily reflect well on yourself?

That's what they do

Quite apart from his embarrassing spastic handed performance, this nigger starts sentences with 'And', that should be a clear flag that everything that follows will be easily dismissable idiot-tier spittle.

Jesus, what a lame-ass faggot.

Stop fucking derailing the thread into politics

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This is a level of incompetence to rival DSP or iJustine

Give those two some credit, user: they were at least able to get past the tutorial and first level.

You know, I used to think I was terrible at video games. And I am, I'll probably die on Oil Ocean like 12 times when I play Sonic Mania or some shit. I never beat Marble Zone in Sonic 1 I think, pretty sure I never got through Hill Top in 2, and due to a dead save battery in my copy of Sonic 3 I don't think I even managed to reach that fucking barrel to get stuck on it in the first place (I blame crushing deaths in all three games for plowing through my lives). I get fucked up by Hammer Bros. in SMB, I get fucked up by Wizrobes in the NES Zelda, god forbid I play an actual difficult game. But, deep in my brain's heart, I know what to do, and if I don't at least I'll keep trying and won't blame the game, but myself. I'm like around the level of Arino, if I had to describe myself. These people don't have any idea what the fuck they're doing.

Yep, I knew I would need a scotch bottle today.
I'm chugging the whole thing now.

Trash

I never cease to be shocked. My 5-year-old son is literally better at video games, and these fuckers do it for a living.

Oh shit, and they changed the fucking title too, from "Cuphead demo at Gamescom: It isn't easy" to "Cuphead Gamescom Demo: Dean's Shameful 26 Minutes Of Gameplay"

Its almost like when people stick their fingers into a M1 action willingly.

This is a good satire piece. It's funny, because no one this retarded actually exists.

Trust me when i say you don't want to do that.
It's actually painful to watch that one.

I've beat fucking castlevania when I was 12.

Sometimes they think more inside the box than animals though. Like when scientists showed children and apes a box, then tickled the box with a stick and pressed a button for candy. Both children and apes imitated the scientists perfectly, but when they replaced the box with a transparent one, the apes just went for the candy right away, and the children still tickled the box with the stick.

Although, in the end it's probably a better adaptation to follow orders exactly, especially in a human's world, since it could mean the difference between life and death. "Turn the toaster off before retrieving something inside with a fork" for example, even if a child doesn't understand why, he'll still follow the order, but a chimp would probably think "lol, why do I need to unplug it? Stupid humies".

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It's what happens when the majority of a generation has had their every need catered to and thus were never mentally challenged during crucial years of brain development.

Does iJustine get better at the game after the tutorial? Because I haven't seen any videos of her in other areas, so if true, this guy is somehow worse than iJustine.

I got all of my mental challenge through vidya when i was a kid.

She's a woman. What do you think?

jesus christ the commentary is almost as bad as the video

So I looked up this iJustine girl because I don't think I've ever heard of her before, and I don't get it. What's her appeal? Like, was she hot before plastic surgeons butchered her face? Tell me if she's more than just some average looking muppet with tits and a learning disability.

She was probably the original camwhore youtuber, and gained the first following of thirsty faggots on that shitty website.

>he literally walks into the first enemy
I thought it wasn't possible to go any lower than tourneyfaggotry, and yet here we are. Good thing i'm half asleep or else I'd be livid.

Seemed like something closer to Alien Soldier (Especially since the game is focused on boss fights).

I've just been cackling all thread like the Wicked Witch.

This sentence disgusts me.

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KEK

kek
archive.is/hGoCo

This man is a goldmine.
I think I can see through his pattern of thinking:
"I don't need to be good. Entertainment should be instead fed straight into my mouth or else it's not different than being bullied by a software. Bullying is bad, right?"

upload this shit as a response to his playthrough on youtube

I wouldn't mind seeing art of Takahashi being bullied by Cuphead to learn how to play the game.

Between hovering, parrying and dodge-dashing Alien Soldier is proto-cuhrayzee, later evolved into DMC, modern Ninja Gaiden and Platinum everything.

Get this onto the drawthread asap

Well, the one thing I found the most perplexing about the title is that there's an ammo count. Every single 2D shooter I've played never had one of those, so that threw me a bit of a curve-ball because you learn that you cannot fire at stuff willy-nilly. You have to actually know when the best times are to take down shit, how to handle each weapon, and optimize your shooting capabilities, and learn to just go "Oh, fuck it!" and risk it all. Also, the timer causes an emphasis on the latter two points.

You should try out Hard Corps Uprising then. Sadly it's stuck on the PS3. It has bullet reflecting, air dashing, vaulting, throwing objects via shoulder ram, and a character who's a melee only sword user. I really wish it was ported to PC.

between this and the footage of doom2016 i'm convinced their attempting to sabotage games by playing them so poorly it makes the games look worse

There is no conspiracy, most video game journalists don't play vidya they just cover them because they to shit to get jobs in other publications, video game journalisms is the bottom of the barrel when it comes to journalism.
This is also another reason why they have such contempt for gamers and will take any opportunity to shit on them.

Not sure if you're praising or condemning it, but what you're saying is true and makes AS great fucking game.

How's that emulation coming along?

By all accounts they should be fired for being unqualified, but all that matters are the connections one has.

I was sort of making a joke. Everything you said is true though and its why game jourrnos are very quick to suck the dick of 'non traditional' games like life is strange or gone home. Those games (if you wanna call them that) make the reviewer feel smart and doesn't actually make them do any of the gaming stuff they hate so much

What about poverty-tier MSpaintfags?

Neither really, I'm just noting that it's something I hadn't seen a 2D shooter do before. Though, it does make me wonder why more games don't experiment with it.

There's a reason why normalfags don't flaunt Mega Man more compared to Mario.

Poorfags should get Gimpshop.

Mega Man arcade only has boss fights. Checkmate

Link?

You and I both forgot that video responses aren't a thing anymore. So how do I do this?

Though funny, you're guaranteed to get carted off to youtube jail.

ah fuck i forgot this
you could post the link of the video on the commnets but woudnt have as nearly a good impact

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1) I'm not done yet.
2) Shitposting channel, so I don't care.

you can upboat it fellow memesters lawl when does the narwhal bacon? XDXDXD

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have an mp4

Oy vey, why are you goyim trying to watch this anti-semetic content. You aren't holocaust deniers are you? You owe me reparations or I'll sue you!!

Jewtube's been pushing to censor any "triggering" content. So basically if it doesn't fit the narrative, it gets the trigger warning plus you can't comment or embed it anywhere and not to mention that it doesn't receive revenue.

The joke is that a video titled Shutitdown got shutdown by Google for our safety.

If I had any SJW sockpuppet account I would spread it on their fourms just to watch who youtube would ultimately side with.

god i think it has been months since i found a thread the made me this livid

I only got it after I posted it. I'll go kill myself now

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You glorious motherfucker.

AND THEY CAN'T DO IT

It will be newspeak for negroes.

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who is this semen demon and is there decent porn of her?

beautiful

i'm this bad at metal slug

You can literally play with your feet better than that in the same time span.

There's a blind guy who finished Oddworld and Exodus using only sound, he has no excuse being this bad.

There's a quadriplegic who plays fighting games with his mouth.

wtf I love coonkey now
8 years

>What the fuck is wrong with these people ^.^?
They aren't "people".

Fucking ableist shitlord.

Mentally.

He has the ability to comment and he's going to use it.

Why are you against the future's sub 90 IQ mulatto children being able to use the internet and communicate with anyone :^)? How dare you go against HW's wish for a literal Rosetta stone with nothing but 😂s and 👌s just so that you can talk with third world children?

You should work for the discovery channel so you can explain why kenyan zerglings can't pass the fucking mirror test you literal fucking subhuman.

Having this much brain damage is encouraged by society and the government.

UP NEXT: WATCH HOW A FUCKING ABO WINS A LEAGUE OF LEGENDS MATCH

Good to know we still have gaming-journalism-level quality posts on this board.

This guy must have immense trouble figuring out the most basic of logic puzzles. The thought process in the tutorial should have been as follows:

It's basic elementary fucking shit most kids can figure out in no time. Plenty of children could finish harder stages than a fucking tutorial, if kids were that dumb than Nintendo would have never made it big. That an adult takes a whole fucking minute to even come to the conclusion that you need to gain some height in order to jump over the pillar implies that his mental faculties must be severely damaged. It could be excusable if he wasn't used to controller inputs and was instead looking at his controller all the time while wondering if he was pressing the right buttons, but that would also imply he never played any videogames other than on his mobile or PC, and even then it's not that hard to adjust to a controller from a keyboard. Way too much time was spent fiddling around doing useless shit, only much later on was it clear that he was finally finding the correct answer.

There's a basic 'game sense' which can carry over from game to game just by playing games for a certain amount of time. You'd be able to understand basic controls and how they carry over from game to game.
How the fuuuuuuuck.

Can you tell me what it's like to live on EBT?

Is that you, Takahashi?

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Dyspraxia is a hell of a condition.

Aren't asians supposed to be good at video games? And he's a male too

Jesus Christ why do e-celebs think their opinion matters? You just lose fans and viewers pulling shit like this.

Maybe he was just really high on drugs at the time, remember Adam Sessler and the cocaine?
That could also be why every Polygon gameplay videos are so atrocious, the copious amount of meth everyone in the office is doing.

See George Takei who's a complete faggot, and

wut

he's a "games journalist"
that pretty much says it all

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He's a faggot, as in, not representative of the general Asian population. Or are you going to argue our homegrown cucks and leftists are a fair portrayal?

DSP's issue is that he refuses to learn from his mistakes and lives a life of purposeful ignorance. Relevant captcha.

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She made a video where she was crying when she heard that Steve Jobs had died, and farted during it.

It has to be genuine mental retardation.

Most of the asian american women i met were obnoxious cumdumpsters with a princess complex.
I think it's something in the water…
Atrazine, fluoride and estrogen is my bet.

Found your problem.

I'm trying to find that old "fluoride stare" pic of a hippy activist woman saying something into a megaphone radio, but all I get are flat earther memes.

The ones in their home country also act like that, they just do it in private because they know doing it in public lowers their chance of getting married. Once they get married though, it's like an American woman growing fat or an Italian woman growing hair. They know they legally trapped someone so they stop hiding their true personality.

(heil'd)
I've experienced the opposite.
Maybe because i let my girlfriend know she's replaceable on a regular basis, it helps i live in Central Europe too so no government-organized sterilization effort.

This is why, if you were the replacable one she'd act like an American woman.

And now that I'm looking for a clip of anybody yelling at a bad singer "YOU'RE FLAT!" or something, I instead find more flat earth bullshit. Why is this spreading faster than melted butter on a toast? Why is everybody so delusional?

I swear it's some kind of manufactured controversy. I saw boatloads of anti-anti-vaxer shit pop up before I even heard or saw anything about anti-vaxers.
Now that that 'public outrage' has died down I'm seeing all this anti flat earth shit flooding social media followed by a bunch of flat earthers.
Someone must be behind setting up a "punching bag of the week" so people have got inconsequential shit to get mad about.

I still think it's due to american men not being masculine enough due to no exercise and toxic compounds in the water which causes them to be pushovers.

This one?

Yeah, thanks.

she'd act like any woman
Make no mistake, this is just naked female behavior, the kind you get when you remove all limiters and consequences. Women have always been like this.

Misogyny!! This is why you don't get laid virgin.

It's hilarious how sluts and cads cannot possibly imagine that there are values higher than getting laid with cheap slags

What in the world is this "Flat Earth" you're talking about?
Youtube has changed the search algorithm recently to where searching for things based on an agenda they don't like gets you results of the exact opposite of what you wanted.

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Flat-earthers don't affect anyone as any job that requires science or engineering would kick them out of the gate fast while anti-vaxxers do, what with their kids not being immune to the most mundane shit and compromising herd immunity. Anti-vaxxing has been a thing for a long ass time.

For those people like me, who want to get into a specific genre but have been scared away because it seems like every games in that genre has the same exact problem, this is actually one of the reasons why I have to disagree with this claim. For example, ever since I was little, I HATED the RPG genre of games, and it wasn't until I played Grandia a few years ago that I finally went "Now it all makes sense." And, then hoping on over to beating Wild Arms 2 made me want to explore more RPGs to know what it is that I've been missing out on.

So, I think the problem isn't "The only people who should be allowed to review a game from 'X' genre are those who like that genre of game." The problem is that the people playing the games cannot find an appreciation for all game genres. While you may prefer the approach strategy games have over shooters, saying that one is superior to another is complete ignorance. Both have their strengths in what they're trying to achieve, and those who cannot see that should have no business with reviewing games at all.

Kek, haven't heard that name for a while. Didn't he get rekt by a camwhore and then went furry?

Strangely, all the foreign azns I've met who haven't made permanent residence in the US or yuroland are not the least bit liberal, yet all the ones who were born here or made permanent residence for a long extended period are complete fucktards. Especially the ones in New York and Cali.

I'm honestly inclined to consider the idea that maybe there's definitely something in the water at this point.

These hurt my soul.

I swear, one of the requirements to be a games journalist should be to clear any modern game in under a week. Don't even have to 100% it, just get the credits to roll. That would filter out 99% of these prats.

Holy shit Mark sounds like a legit autist

This video is the sole reason he should not be a board owner. Fucking kike man.

People like this is the reason we need eugenics.
Looking at you, Mark.

EVERY THREAD UNTIL YOU LIKE IT

Fuck I just remembered that time where the video with most video replies ever was THAT Dragonforce YTP.
It was my introduction to the notion that shady shit was going on the internet as it easily doubled the "official" most video replied video which was routinely awarded to whatever MTV dreck was being shilled at the time.