Smo-Crack Daily: Buttplug Bum Master Bastard Faster Spazter Ass Blaster Disaster Edition. + Archive!

so there are more?

didn't mean to quote

but where do you find the SECRET BITCH?

yeah but it's not YL related

I thought the lizard was a chick

pretty neat, but isn't that off character?

i mean i never played the BK games, but i thought Kazooie was the straight-(wo)man and banjo was the silly klutz.

This makes me very uncomfortable, mainly because Banjo looks like a Homosexual

who cares, you're satan anyway.

Nah Banjo is the straight man while Kazoo is the woman who can't keep her mouth shut and gets them into trouble because of it

Kazooie is the one who'll basically start swearing and insulting everyone.

Banjo is the straight man.

Chill, satan.

got it wrong, my bad. i really could have swore it was the other way around

And yet again my decision to never donate to Kikestarters on principal has paid off. Too bad the faggots who actually backed this shit will never learn their lesson.

just a shame, but I don't back shit because this shit can happen.

I hope playtonic gets massive shit for this allowing a blue hair betanumale on their team and ever listening to neofag

there are no penises in that pictures

why would you spoiler such softcore?

Ah, sorry, here.

The first picture has Laylee jerking him off two feet

Where do I go to get someone to draw a penis on this?

It's a really good picture, I love it a lot.

I swear to god, if you don't ask someone to draw a Pringles can human cock on him

chameleons have two dicks?

oh. it literally looked like laylee was wearing red clown shoes in that picture to me for some reason. my bad

Most reptiles do

wikipedia.org/wiki/Hemipenis

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THICC

careful

No, yooka needs more dick like this

i dont know who that is user maybe show me :^)

The guy who worked on Anton?

Why do you faggots want to fuck animals?

because i'm a zoophile

same

My porn folder is organized by animals.
Mostly Pokemon.

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Not videogames, faggot

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I don't think I've seen a can of Pringles in years, how big is that?
My dick is exactly as big as this remote control model

Kazooie is better than any of the Yooka Laylee characters. I just wish there was more porn. Maybe I should fix that.

that is the exact same remote i have for my TV also nice going, how many inches is that?

1.7 x 7.3 x 0.6 in
at least according to the manufacturer

I'm not usually much for furry shit like this, but I'll be honest, I've got a rather large attraction to Kazooie. No idea why.
Oh, also, C L O A C A

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rather be a futa, you fag.

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This is literally just a furry porn thread

your point?

I can't spam it with porn to stop the cancer

Disgusting!

thats another game where the snake wears pants

CUM ON THE BAT
CUCK THE LIGGER

so is the bat a girl?

more like a woman with a penis, don't be stupid.

But it was >tfw not a ___
As in I am not this

If you were a futa you'd be a male because you're a gy

Futa is gay, you blatant homosexual.

you are gay

Has anyone got the full size of this?

To be quite honest, my familiar, you don't see me shaking my damn head when there's full on dedicated weeb threads running. Either ban both weeb and fur or do a truce and gas the kikes together.

did you know the clit of a human woman is literally a micro-penis? who's gay now?!

All the full images are in the MEGA link, my dude. But here you go.

Stretched dick. Don't do what the guy in that pic did anons it ruins your benis
T. did it too.

Not in this faggot thread.

Yeh I agree, I just wanted to warn anyone who wanted to come into this thread to talk about the op topic

Also permanently stretches it wider, but hey, at least my pisshole isn't clamped tight

I don't understand. What's the problem?

Maybe the next one?

Doubt it.

Why would you make this?

Basically the pringles benis guy did something that stretched his dick. He used a pump or jelqued or whatever but he stretched his dick. That way you can make any dick look impressively big but the issue is you almost completely lose the sense of touch on your dick, it gets permanently hurt inside and even then you still won't pump enough blood so while your dick might be hueg it'll be soft and unpleasurable to a woman (guys are obcecated with size but hardness matters even more assuming you don't have a pinkie dick). There's a male pornstar with a ruined dick called Danny D. If you look at any of his videos you'll see his dick is basically a balloon and you'll see videos of girls giving him blowjob as they bend his benis as if it was completely soft. Yeah, that's a guy who barely feels his dick and any moans from the girls are faked.

Oh fucking shit. What's the fucking point of having a HUGE cock of it's always soft. Jesus christ, I'll rather have a dagger dick that's always hard but average. Still, the thought of a huge floppy cock is kinda hot too, but it would be impossible to cum

Man or woman I cannot imagine the bat speaking in anything but Danny Devitos voice.

Close.

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this is why you do kegels.

i wonder if either yuka or laylee has a rimjob fetish

I don't think you understand. The other guy says your dick literally does not respond, or fill up because it is not used to that. You basically broke your dick.

Kickstarterfags deserve everything terrible they get. We said it from the start yet they still refuse to listen while funding knockoffs of classics.

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So has anything new happened about the lizard and bat game while we were away?

Reviewers are slamming the game for terrible camera, dry humor and overall it's pretty damn mediocre.

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A cringey rap, and the comment section is on fire as well

it's like the DK Rap but bad.

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Maybe because the rap promotion was bad, the game will turn out surprisingly good, right?

That Yooka-Laylee rap was bad from lyrics to cadence. Even that taco bell scholarship commercial had more of a rhythm.

Maybe because this advertisement is bad, the game will turn out surprisingly good, right?

What will save 3D platformers now?

Super Mario Odyssey

i have hope, user

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That just means he's self-aware and wants to prevent it from happening, or he knows that more race mixed people will mean more people like Jontron
He wants to be the only one

Bump for lizards?

You want to fuck that lizard don't you?

Gee what do you think user

Their winning move at this point is to simply announce that they were trying to avoid drama, apologize to Jon and their fans for a knee-jerk reaction. Then spout off some bullshit of the change already being made, but offer Jontron voice re-insertion as free dlc for anyone who wants it.

Heck, go bananas, as a joke use all of Jon's recorded sounds and have him voice every character in the game.

I mean, it wont happen, I just think stating an obvious and easy solution makes the inevitable failure more fun to laugh at.

if they actually did that, i'd give it a pirate.

Its too late. People have dug into their twitter feeds and seen the SJW ideologies at full display. There is no saving PlayTonic anymore, not even from themselves.

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Yea that girls twitter has got to be one of the largest red flags ive seen in quite some time

Wait are you guys just messing around, or is there really a procedure or method of making your dick larger? I have never heard of this before the only way I was aware of was having that bone/ligament that makes your dick upright be surgically extended to make your dick bigger, at the cost of it being floppy but still hard.

What happened to the last thread
Is it kill?

You basically use physical trauma to either expand the cells in a vacuum (ruining the blood vessels) or physically stretch them with weights and such (stretching the skin)

Either way, the muscle more or less remains the same, you lose sensitivity, and maim your cock in some way

I thought benis didnt have any

Or whatever that spongiform crap is on either side

This thread sucks wheres the porn? Wheres the comedy?

This is the calm before the storm, user.

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In your heart you know the answer.

Has there been ANY news for this game in the past 2 years?

All I know is that it can only waft ancient odors.

Yes. They've been posting here every so often and AppleGreen has a video update showcasing new stuff. They're down a lot of manpower though so it'll probably come out in 2929.

One for the ages.

I still need to fuck that lizard

Burchchan 2.0, thanks faggots.

YOU EVEN MADE A WORD FILTER HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Holy fuck 8shit is dead.

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benis is pure smooth muscle

Why is Crono attacking Shaggy?

With three roughly cylindrical tubes of tissue that functions very much like Airmat only with blood instead of air.

Blizzard, a multi-million dollar company won't make legacy servers no matter how many people ask for it, and the only reason is pride. These people are beyond rational thinking to an inhuman degree.

Its not about admitting whether they're wrong or not. At this point they're likely scared to find out that official vanilla servers would become more popular than current patch. Especially since its a well-founded fear with the (lack) of subscription numbers they have.

Okay, my mistake.

I still find it a little shocking how late in the game that this thing got revealed for what it is. Usually the writing is on the wall a lot earlier in the cycle.

This is how I can tell you are a newfag.

Our boy Jimbo's back for those amazing reviews that justify him getting over 10k a month from retards.

Well, you know what they say about Chameleons changing their skin color to blend with their surroundings and hide. Even if it's false

Jesus Christ how horrifying.

I've been saying since the screenshots of the Casino level were released that the worlds looked huge and barren. Most people agreed but hoped they would supplement it with quicker movement options (which they didn't) and some salty backers whined, but largely that point seems to have been consistent at least.

fuck off faggot, this is not gamergays.

l-lewd!!!!

tfw no pure smooth muscle in my mouth

Tou don't have a tongue?

y-y'know, the other kind…

So what are the scores looking at now?
Hope you guys stopped by to leave a little "nice" review

Chargebacks are your friend and Playtonic nor Team17 can say no to them. To conduct a charge back just use the reasoning that "The game was shown and is supposedly horribly optimized." or the Wiiu statement.

Since your CC issuer or bank will handle this there is zero need to keep in contact with playtonic

on the other hand, a chargeback with your bank or credit card company can permanently fuck your credit rating. if you're a neet, who cares, otherwise you should probably weigh whether the cost of one video game is worth that.

LOL no. Chargebacks do not have any effect on your credit. They're half the point of having a credit card in the first place – protection against fraudulent charges.

I have no idea who Becky is, but I wanna give her my dick. Maybe I can literally fuck the SJW out of her.

they have a twatter, they tweet something now and then
twitter.com/mobiustrip_
its active, last post 18h ago

bats are known to engage in oral sex, regardless of their partner's gender

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snek ok but short.

The manufacturer saw your dick?

What a cute snake. Miles ahead from the red abomination with a goiter from YL.

Disregard the name, I was probably trying to access /min/ earlier and hallucinated.

abit like my snek

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Pick one, faggot.

The second pic and both of the second post got deleted, anyone save it?

Considering how late in development the Jontron thing happened, I think its fair to say that Jon's lines are still in. How easy it'd be to mod them back in is questionable, but there's no way they removed them all this late.

WebM'd that shit for you.

man, I miss when youtube videos weren't made by spastics.

From what I understand its a Day 1 update, and backers get the game BEFORE day 1

Don't even fucking joke about that, N&B was a game no one fucking asked for.

Me. Time to make my own game.

anton and coolpecker has more important lizards anyway

Call me a faggot but I like cute things like that once in a while. Why do videogames try so hard to be dark and serious since they started to catter to normalfags ?

So Jontron actually made it into the game before they cucked out? Internet personality drama Hot Coffee mod WHEN?

I actually like N&B but maintain that it isn't a B&K game and is only above average if you don't like the gimmick

Yes assuming it will let me re upload it to this thread.

I like Resident Evil 6 a lot, but its not a Resident Evil game and the people who like Resident Evil shouldn't have their game forcefully transformed into an amazing third person shooter with coop when it goes against the premise that the series is founded on.

Hi everyone it's been awhile but Kickstarter games all end up the same way so I put this how to together in case you have trouble grasping the concept or forgot what happened last time, you gotta make a game and sink it, this is how:

-Target some nostalgia, this one's really important because since you are sadistic and like to hurt people you have to pick something they care about and hold it hostage, make sure it's something that generates a lot of good will and then…

-Hire a goon squad to antagonize and condescend to the fanbase. Rainbow hair and people who claim to be gamers but look like the last game they played was Bejeweled when they were 10 are the new striped shirts when it comes to hiring henchmen, but before you do anything too egregious…

-Make sure you are using an unethical platform that allows you to keep all the money you stol- er- were paid before you reveal all the radical changes that you are making to the product that were in no way disclosed or are outright contrary to what was originally advertised. Communism in the streets, Ancap in the sheets!

-Keep telling yourself what great people you are for being predatory elitists with low empathy who ridicule everyone you consider "below" you because you have the plausible deniability of standing behind an ideology that professes its endless virtue

Ok guys I hope this how-to really cleared it up and remember that nothing really matters in the end anyway so wear your pants on your head

BAZOONGLE!

Did you post that? Because you hit the nail right on the head.

Do you mean 4? 'Cause 6 is suppose to be trash ain't it? No doubt people would be and should be upset if their favorite series just took on a completely different gameplay style, even if the result is amazing (which rarely happens).

But the thing with N&B was it came about due to Microsoft having a game in need of some flavor and a series they were doing nothing with so they smooched them together, and N&B is what came out. It's effectively a spin-off game that had no main series game to accompany.

No, that wasn't me. I have some of his other work from back in the day though to share.

Why is there not more rule 34 of Binky Bunny?

Because Lola and Babs exist.

I know what I'm buying with my Yooka money.

If he was, he got over it really fast because he went back to cracking jokes and doing what he normally does in less than a day

god damn furries. get off my lawn.

How come I hear nothing about this?
If shiggydiggy had farted this out on the switch everyone would be cumming in each others faces about it, it actually looks like something you'd want to play.

Got it on Switch today. It's breddy gud. Also, unlike Yooka, it came out on the Switch the same day as the PS4, Xbone, and PC versions.

No. Resident Evil 6 has amazing gameplay.

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But that actually is the biggest problem in the US right now.

One thing I've noticed is that the SJWs themselves can't make up their minds on whether Jon is a white devil or if he's a self-hating sandnigger. I remember arguing with some neofag on the steam forums and he kept going back and forth between saying he was a white white supremacist and an arab white supremacist with internalized racism. The thought of one of their precious PoC turning against them really fucks with their heads. Although I think Jon's family is from old Iran and they're pretty much white.

I'm not gonna get into why weebshit is OK and furfaggotry is bad. But it makes me genuinely sad to see you say that.

That's like asking for a pierogi in a Lowe's.

His family is from the old Iran. He and his family are above the sandniggers.

Light skin is enough for them to cry white supremacy, when that chinese cop killed a nigger in the US BLM were crying white supremacy because Asians have "white" skin. And cant forget about White Hispanic Zimmerman.

On the US census, white is considered someone with European or Middle-Eastern background.

You can't simmer the zimmer.

Is this actually crashing & burning?

Nigga, you could have black on black crime and they'll cry about white supremacy, because one of them was whitewashed and internalized or whatever the fuck hoop they want to jump through

c'mere fagit

(checked)
Nonwhite criminals should be deported from white nations instead of being incarcerated. This would be beneficial to everyone involved:
The nonwhites who hate "whiteness" would be moved to a country without it, so they could behave naturally instead of trying (and failing) to pretend to be able to function in civilization.
The higher-IQ nonwhites capable functioning in civilization would be separated from the low-IQ nonwhites, effectively cleaning the muck out of the local genepool. After several generations, they could relocate en mass to their homelands and rebuild them into first-world nations (after containing the quasi-bestial native population in reservations).
The whites would no longer have to spend inordinate sums of tax dollars each year to feed, clothe, and shelter a gigantic population of minorities who have repeatedly openly declared their desire to destroy the civilization that is keeping them alive.

But what about the white criminals? Do they get a free pass?

They get to fight each other to death in a sick ass neon 80's thunder-dome.

You low test cucks really have no creativity.

Eh, it's the expected result from continuous usage of doublethink.
In the end they don't know what's right and wrong and in the best case everything is anything in the end, just whenever it needs to be so.

You'll have enough to buy at least a 12-pack of beer with the remaining money.

well arent those bandwagoning cucks going to be disappointed when they see that his videos are video games and movies and shit.
political drones have the attention spans of fruit flies

fuck they always get in

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pick one you undermeme-playing hymie

holy shit hes a sandnigger? thats hilarious

You'd be surprised how many people HAVEN'T heard about Jontron. They'll come for the politics but stay for the charm.

Wow EPIC post my friend, are you from the Tumblrs?

Don't confuse Iranians and Arabs. One's a proud race of empire-makers, the other a proud race of desert nomads and animal-lovers.

I loved those from Final Fantasy 12.

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ECH!

(checked)

Nice digits though

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I guess some people want this gayme
Why the fuck would you pay more than 20 bucks for vidya

How big big is Yookas cock?

I have mixed feelings about this.

that slightly frightened good job gets me everytime

fineleatherjackets.net/monkeyinflation

which one, the left or the right?

I'm glad Snake Pass isn't over that price.

I can't crush this down under 12 mb but this is SO worth a watch.

This is a pretty good idea. Or I think non-whites that get three strikes/arrested thrice for a violent crime should be put to death. Would definitely thin out the horde.

Or, you know, we could gas the whole lot and claim their clay as lebensraum for the white race.

Rare was a shit and the only really good game they ever laid their hands upon was Narc for NES, which was a port. Makes sense that everyone who imitates them is shit too.

Has jontron become inseparable from this game, and others like it?

It's been a while since I've seen this amount of love being put in a game.

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Well he's become inseparable from Laylee's chiropteran cunny.

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I knew you faggots would give up. Now Jonno will never tell us where the caveman is

On the Steam Page? Shit that sucks.

Daily reminder that sega.com/14111219 is happening today and will kill Cucka-Jewme dead in it's tracks.

igg-games.com/yooka-laylee-free-download.html

Cracks up, boyos

Just in time along with Bayonetta.

Get out, Ahmed.

???

What song in that webm?

Thanks! Though, what are the keys for this? As in, inputs. I can't roll, jump or talk to any characters.
I can only use X, C, Space and some other camera related ones.

Help!

pls help

KB+M setup layout seems to be a little bit retarded:
WASD\Arrow keys - movement, Q\E\Mouse - rotating camera, 1-4 - emotions or something like that, Tab - aiming mode, Shift - rolling, Ctrl - crouching, Z\LMB - attack, X - jumping, Spacebar - jumping + interacting with stuff, C\RMB - sticking out your tongue, V\Alt - some special action (at this point in the game (I haven't made it pretty far) it does "Sonar Shot" move).
Also keep in mind that some actions are not available to you right off the bat. E.g. you can't attack shit until you speak to snake-wth-pants for the first time.

Venomous, though.

I lol'd

maybe the lore is snek killed the humans

I actually recognized him before I read the filename

You can pause buffer into shit, Unity was a mistake and this game is pure aids.

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Fukkin ded.

A+

-This nigga got a gallery?-

even Mario 64 was more competent than that.

I like the cut of your biology knowhow

Lore is Noodle is a vegetarian

So at worst he attacks watermelons

Here, I cut up into three webm so you can appreciate it.

rule34.paheal.net/post/list/Bishop_(artist)/1

Whups, here we go

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I thought Noodle was a lady snek

There we have it… how passion and technique are used to make a good game.

Sorry, but considering he's already a vegan and he takes orders from a humming bird, he is probably a bottom.

rethink your life

Mine is a bit thinner and like an inch shorter, but do you know why it's better?
Cause it hits my gf's g spot quite nicely

Still think they kinda could've done better job on snek's eyes in the release version. There's something off about them.

In the first game Kazooie was silly and Banjo was straightfoward and a bit dopey, in the second game Kazooie's gotten more snarky and crude. By Nuts and Bolts, Banjo's gotten in on the snark too and is noticeably world-weary.

Banjo… had a hard life.

I think they screwed up big time with the name and the title card, that's why it's selling so poorly despite being a good game.
The first time I saw that name and title card it didn't even register in my brain because it looked like one of those mobile shovelware ports on Steam.

the name also makes it sound like some board game.