DUKE NUKEM MOVIE !!!

DUKE NUKEM MOVIE !!!

MOVIES ARE SAVED!
variety.com/2018/film/news/john-cena-duke-nukem-movie-1202673127/

this is a meme movie

Why?

I hope Michael Bay directs it. He is the only non-pozzed person in Hollywood who loves violence and tits.

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I disagree. There's only one man that can make this right.

duke was literally a meme game

But can he make actionkino scenes like Bay?

blow it out your ass

he's done his fps work, this time is for christopher nolan, so he can fucking ruin the sound and make the film unwatchable while he masturbates to his deaf-mute fetishism in the back of the cinema.

What is Commando and The Last Action Hero?

Movie's already ruined.

i fapped to the strippers with the titty tassles,
tbh tho the art work on the box seemed really gay to me later.

Why is it bad anons.
i have no idea who the guy is

A meme wrestler. The guy himself is actually not a bad person and he shouldn't be the red flag here.
The real problem is that Duke Nukem is too masculine. Hollywood will not allow a Duke Nukem movie to go out without a Current Year treatment, but I guess it might turn out okay if Bay directs it.

So it's either
or

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I thought the jew promoted violence and sexualization to demoralize the people? Wasn't that the whole point of Weimar

Duke can't exist in the current year because Duke was always just a parody of the 80/90#s action hero. When Duke tries to be Duke today we end up with World tour and "BAZINGA!"

Dukes an extinct animal because his environment is dead.

Who in the fuck asked for this?

Feminists. They see a toxic masculine icon and now they will destroy it.

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Unsure of the execution as long as Randy Bitchford owns the license.
Could be a fun romp in the world of 80's action stars but will most likely be a watered-down bore.

How they're going to fill 2 hours with just quips and alien guts is beyond me but I hope the story humorously plays off of Dude Kookem's one-dimensional personality.

Also, Cosmo the alien should be in it either as a buddy or supporting character. He saved Duke's life once.

This. It's like having a McBane movie when the genre has been 20 years out of date.

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I see no way this movie would be allowed to be authentic. Can't wait to see DN get pussywhipped by a strong woman of color and fight those damn dirty alt righters.

There's no way to do this movie well anyways, though. John St. John *is* Duke Nukem. It'd be like casting someone else as Nathan Drake, it would be extremely distracting and the voice is what's important anyways. the appearance is so secondary to the voice. You remember the voice way more than you do the character. The games are in first person, you barely see him, but you remember that "Clint Eastwood on even more Steroids" voice.

Game movies that would be better

Star Wars Bounty Hunter
Resistance
Alien Isolation
Final Fantasy X
The Lord of the Rings: The Third Age
Minecraft
War of the Monsters

Mount & Blade/CK2 game filmed like a mix of Conan the Barbarian and the Lion in Winter.

His face, his ass?
What's the Difference?

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I have to disagree. Not saying DN3D is bad, sure it had cool environments and an unique sense of humor. But the gameplay didn't feel nearly as satisfying as Marathon 2 or Quake.

BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

John Cena could pull the look off, but duke as a setting has been pretty pozzed lately.

How much do you want to bet Duke isn't gonna be sexist? Instead just pozzed.

Reminder that James Earl Jones, the guy who voices Duke, is a diehard liberal faggot who hates guns and has wet dreams of gun control.

I hope he gets bullied into non-pc lines, or gets forbidden to participate in this, if the movie is actually good.

YOU'RE A BIG MAC

John St John is his voice actor you retard.

Some kind of scheme to save money on taxes.

John St John is who you're thinking about, though he is an anti gun faggot.

bump

John Cena can't sell wrestling movies, like fuck I'm going to pay to see him "act" in a movie.

At least it's not the Rock. About all I can hope is they don't make it too annoyingly self aware and do Duke right and have some big titty babes to rescue.

As long as they have fun with the movie, I think it will be good.

They should have made the movie with Rowdy Roddy Piper

Duke was never sexist. Duke genuinely loves women and is willing to risk his own life to protect them. It's just liberal game journos and soyboys in general who just seem to constantly be pushing this "everything manly is evilbad" bullshit.

I don't know if it's an envy thing or if it's purely cultural Marxism, but it's something that has become a common gripe the left seems to have. All men and anything inherently masculine is the cause of all problems in the world and is to be feared and hated (except of course when there is a war that needs to be fought.)

Just take a look at this limp-wristed faggot from WhatCulture talking about how "problematic" Duke is in Current Year + 3

Sadly a greater cancer has made us forget a lesser one.

Here's a Webmd

Skipped though it, the faggotry was to much. "Muh tiddy tickle level".

sexism == masculinity you fascist

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If this is played as an over-the-top R-rated comedy it could be one of the funniest movies of the decade.

Being a Michael Bay associated production I really hope they don't fuck up the alien designs, shit's supposed to be humorous and gory.

Why didn't they cast Brendan Fraser in the role he was born to play? Is there no justice in Hollywood?

Nice earlobe spacing there, soyboy.

What the fuck did he mean by this? This dude looks like he's in his thirties.

It's either soy or fluoride, one of them will accelerate aging.

What's it like having shit taste?

4ute

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I like to think executives somewhere are just really off the ball and still think people are playing Duke Nukem and Half-Life so now we're getting movies of them instead of Overwatch or some shit.

wrong hair color. they should have cast Cody instead.

D:

My name is Dick Kickem' I'm here to chew ass and kick bubble gum and I'm all out of gum.

That's Darth Vader you absolute retard.

Quake sucked shit.

mods delete this

Get fucked

He died though, rest in peace.

it will be terrible. john cena will talk to women nicely in the movie and save kittens.

Oh boy, a mediocre movie about a tainted and ruined vidya franchise no one has given a shit about in years, played by a meme wrestler who will probably demand a muslim tranny be thrown into the film as his sidekick/love interest "cuz Duke is all about tolerance and love cuz that's cool my dudes!".


This. The guy went from being a somewhat amusing meme for kiddies to an over sensitive symbol of "feminine manliness".


I want to berate you, but I can't deny that a movie about building with brown bricks would be the #1 kids movie of the decade.

DUKE

Not natty.

So who's edgy enough for the inevitable Blood movie?

Jared Leto

Tom "Little Dingus" Hardy.

I really believe the film will open in some fashion similar to this.

Duke3D is alright, but Blood is the superior Build Engine game.

Mark William Calaway

This movie is 20 years too late. Duke will be getting lectures about feminism from his problem glasses girlfriend because it is the current year + 3.

Was getting a side of fries part of your plan?

Blood is shit game, and everyone who worships it tends to be a tranny. The Blood fan game (or whatever the fuck it is) is lead by a tranny named Coraline.

Duke Nukem as he was in 1996 is the hero we need. Instead we will probably get Duke Cuckem.


Reminds me of pic related, the guy who also went from man to cuck.

Is he going to play one of the skellies?

Duke Nukem Forever wasn't bad. It was hated on for bs reasons like "sexism" and "muhsoggyknees". It's still a fucking fun game.

It was funny but the gameplay was console shit.
Duke Nukem 3D was a funny game that celebrated B-movies but it was also great as a shooter. It was basically Doom but better.

Blood is the best FPS though.

Who else wants to see it follow the plot of the ORIGINAL Duke Nukem?

you're an inspiration for birth control

As much as I like Duke Nuken, I hate John Cena a million times more. He absolutely killed the WWE for me. He did way more damage to the company than anyone else other than McMahon who had a huge hard on for him.

OwO what's this?

He's a Big guy.