A thread for people comfortable with the fact they were born with a penis

Howdy strange

im boo
your best friend
im here to strengthen pack relations

+t

The what now?

The what huh?

...

The word "pumping" will forever be sexual in my mind.

WAIT IS THAT MAH COLBERT?

There was a sequel in the 80s.
Featuring women.

Pumping gas...

Pumping ass

everyone needs allies in these dark times
even shitposters
you are my greatest ally colbert

where is THE FOLDER

I can see how pumping a gassy ass would turn you on.

Affirmative

Sounds... well, terrible

based ethy

How am I your ally? When did this happen?

My C: drive.

When everybody else turned him down.

The girl he posted at least looked somewhat like a girl.
Even thought that dyke probably munches more carpet than the threads combined.

you seem like a guy like me who just goes with the flow

so i figured i could just infer it to better our survival in the threads

we buddies?

That part sounds gross but pumping a butt doesn't.

IT IS NEVER OVER

youtube.com/watch?v=YRPHl1DIed4

tsuchi all you do all day is post pictures of my waifus in bad angles

You never know until you've tried.

Oh, that would make sense

I guess you could say that

Until the end of time

quit teasing me kaybe
do this for me

I have a headache.

Get just like the most basic of standards.

Its Suicide Season

I can go without trying.

What the fuck are they wearing?

whatever
i can always fap later
do it when youre feeling better buddy

minami isnt even my waifu
i dropped him for more time with kanra
try elma maybe

That is a funny picture.

Typical. What a prude.

The female beefcakes just make my penis somehow go more flaccid.

how am i even still alive right now

for someone with a resting heart rate usually around 55bpm, yesterday i topped 160

I can post male beefcakes if you'd prefer.

I'd rather be a prude than crude.

...

That black dude looks so lost

That would be even worse.
It's like one of those things where you can see that the girl was probably attractive when just barely toned up.
Then just kept going way too far and are firmly in the "eugh" territory.

me in the back

took my computer apart, dusted it quickly, then troubleshooted why my HDD wasn't working

got that sorted out, then proceeded to dust my room at 3am

was standing on my balcony shaking out a dusty rag in my boxers at 3am

kek

DIDNT READ LOL

160 is not goooood, but you'll be okay

I think I've hit 183 before in spin class

If tells me "you act air headed"
Is that not an insult?

Why are you lost, Boo?

it was 160 at rest, lol

snorting MDMA the sertraline

then*

nope
its a good thing
girls who arent air-headed turn into egocentric bitches who can never be happy

yeah I knew what you meant

figured it was from drugs

since you do drugs a lot

hey erin you do anything worthy enough to be talked about besides drugs

because from your posting history it doesnt seem like it

God I love The Running Man

You also have to remember that air doesn't float, so you can't tie a string around their neck like a balloon, they'll just sink to the ground.

i don't do a lot any more :/

Movie or book?

uh huh................

even now

The book doesn't have Arnie

...

Seems normal

Oh, does that Pumping Iron movie have Arnie too?

gee thanks...

Its tactical.

DO DRUGS

Speaking of drugs. Hi lexi

The movie is almost entirely about him

Never seen it.

At least post better guys

it's rly high for me

like double what it should be

What kinds of guys would those be

...

For shame.

oh wait I'm guilty of this 24/7

/meme

I guess I could ask my brother for his Netflix to watch it.

YOU ARE A KNOWN EARTHWORM BOY.

i will not recover

Nezi post dick
Colbert; Arnie's movie looks ace. Cumming.
Blue Moon; Why so blue
Erin; are you seeing the 4th dimension?

Watch it, it'll be as satisfying as cumming is

i'm seeing regrets

WAR GOD.

RIFK HUG AND ;OVE HAIKUS

I'm getting the feeling of cumming at home, I'm getting the feeling of cumming in the gym

...

...

I don't know, that's just what color they wanted the ice cream I guess.

As satisfying as a rug burn? I can't wait.

Is that the real proto?

my penis is inadequate, as am I

You and dorito both at this point, I thiink. He is probably wallowing right now lol.

The feeling of lifting.

...

...

Well. Is it blue? that is weird

a pee pee is a pee pee.

You can't please everybody. Or even anybody.

It is quite blue. Tastes good though.

this is tolerable
kinda gay though dont you think mate

but im a man
how's this relationship gonna be great if thats the case

just had de ja vu. the matrix is changing something. brb breakfast

Is it.... like... blueberries? or bubblegum? sounds weird as fugg.

Thats better

Ugh, fine.

It's marshmallowy, but with something else that I can't think of a good way to describe.

ban why did zoe go away

feminine benis required

just give me your whole c: drive
your folders could have me fap for years

I'm going to order a hard drive in a few days to back stuff up, maybe I'll get around to putting some stuff on an upload site.

I told them they aren't allowed to post.

...

Nice poz party

ban pls this meme has already run its course

I hate memes.

archive.org/details/KmartOctober1989

i hope this isnt true
id hate to lose a cutie like you to women

pls do
its a grand collection

*pukes*

...

oh yeah then why do you keep posting them,?

Cool.

I paid way more than a grand for it. In opportunity cost, anyway.

Sexual_Prowess.webm

I don't though

...

you do too

where

r

proofs?

Fuck this card straight to heck.

Fuck hunters.

Fuck blizzard for nerfing the only viable starting-game mage build

fuck matchmaking for putting me up against people with several legendaries in their deck when I have almost literally nothing.

fuck hearthstone.

~

Yeah, duh.

u didnt tell zoe to stop posting and he stopped

Sluts

...

...

I don't know why I bother with games based entirely on RNG (fuck enter the gungeon too) when I have the worst RNG luck in existence

in this one game I played a long time ago there was some automatic process that had a 40% success rate and out of 180 iterations it won 4 times so I guess god just hates me for being a tranny

...

can we change the dumping direction to real grils finally

...

what

Just play something more skill-based like Russian Roulette.

If you want to be all "full circle" about it, I guess.

WAOW that face
that booty
do you have a name on this goddess

youtube.com/watch?v=9FcU516zHnE

That's a dude, brotato.

fuck
its original post has no source
kill me

Judging by the liver spots on the hand, that's like a 40 year old dude pounding him.

don't worry, I'll only post real girls wink

i want to be that 40 year old dude

Just circular tumblr, 7chan, Holla Forums, and 4chan archived posts. No cigar.

why do i feel like you are lying to me, gooby

would I lie to you? :3

...

vaginas > penis

the op of this thread is great

Probably, it is the internet.

youtube.com/watch?v=cQ_fc6jMDcE

kanra hello

what's up guys

boipussy > roast beef

I'm comfortable with my penis

and happy I don't have a vagina

darn, you caught me!

do you have a name

EV training my Snorlax

Dude I keep getting random boners more and more often now. It's kinda awkward. What should I do?

Yeah but then you're left either sucking a dick or eating out an ass and that's disgusting.

Clearly cutting your penis off is the only feasible solution

Chastity I guess.

...

Then why do you do this to penis

Cut it off

Sounds pretty awful

NOPE. No can do.

Never.

Kanra no.

It's our job to stop the homosexual agenda.

based tp

Then suffer

Nothing can stop the Homogay Agenda. It's a disease.

Sorry, you're out of options my friend.

asdasd

Use your words

I am actively trying to spread and increas the Homosexual Agenda.
HeteroNormies are the past.

Jaish al-Fatah have taken over Khalasah in southern Aleppo.

Kind of offended.

tps probably better than you tbh
hes better than the average user

That's better.

yes, it's stephen

do what?

I don't fuck dogs.

I try to be

is that a poster?
0 results on tineye

youre thinking of squash

TP used to like babysit dogs all day long.
So everyone just assumes he fucks dogs.

Destroy it, ofc

TP sounds like the name of someone who fucks dogs

Time for work.
Have a nice day lovelies♥

werkze

I want Overwatch but I want to not spend moni!11!!

I would never destroy my penis, what are you going on about

byeu c:

So what you're really saying is you don't want Overwatch.

You are destroying other Peni by posting Peni

spend bitches
get moni

That is one ugly man butt.

ive never heard of this

Even the ancients had heard of TPs proclivities.

Even the ancients had heard of and immortalized TPs proclivities.

Thank you for that Holla Forums

I want it!

I want it for under 30 EUR

store.steampowered.com/app/440/

yeaaaaaahhhhhhhhh......that's not how it works

40USD is nothing, man.

10/10 meme

Don't act like you know how penis works

Overwatch is literally TF2 with ult abilities.

And tits.
And ass.

It's a masterpiece

I mean, I legit laughed. It was a good joke. But there are enough differences between the two games. Granted, not $40 worth of differences.

...

LMAO

Snorlax isn't THAT fat

notch is really been at it lately

again, fat shaming = stress eating = more fat

at least for me

GORGE PIGGY
FEAST

Maybe if you hadn't gotten fat in the first place there wouldn't be a problem.

You could always try not caring about what people say about you on the internet, or use it as an excuse to force yourself to lose weight.

Calm down you're not even fat

That's just gross.
The image that is.

wow this place still isn't dead
how depressing

Shut up, Grimmy.

Everything always is.

oh i bet it is
amazing deduction skills user

I gained weight from depression/stress
had someone do something really shitty to me at the same time that I was being overwhelmed from school (taking too many hard classes in one semester)

I lost weight again

but I'll never be happy with my weight....

I'm emotional, sorry

can't help it

i disagree

You're not fat you shit, stop

What was the shitty thing? Dish.

arent you enjoying the show, friend?

I think the best thing you can do is just stop bitching about weight and just realize everyone makes fun of everyone here.

That's not depressing

Sounds like a bunch of excuses. You can do it. Anyone can.

Or maybe what said, I have no idea.

every time i return everyone always assumes i'm some nig nog they know

well aren't you chipper

it is when you know why people come here

ps i am not some nignog you know

It's not the same reason for everyone

That's why they call me the wood chipper. At least I think that's why...

but they're pretty much all depressing

same

Not really
You know them
And even then, that's a weird idea of depressing

*don't know

Maybe he's right. Maybe we're sad and we just don't know it yet.

the people here are lonely
or the people here are purposeless
the people i've seen leave all left for the same reasons
they no longer needed this place

I HAVENT HAD ANY IN ALMOST A YEAR THIS TASTES LIKE FUCKING MAGIC

Don't forget lonely and purposeless

Please spoiler if you're going to post yourself.

They're pretty good.

He's got me pegged, I don't know about you. Maybe it's the second coming or something.

I'm a newfag on Holla Forums and don't know how to spoiler images

You must be a genius of some sorts, figuring that out all on your own.

How are you named swedish fish if you haven't had them in a year you fucking commie

I have been poor/haven't lived near anywhere that they can be bought. they are surprisingly difficult to find in some places

Is that you?

show post options and limits, check spoiler box
not really any reason to though

also

I don't wanna talk about it honestly

I'm over it

;w;

I know how to lose weight, and I want to

I will start losing weight again at some point

But I want to know what made your soul fat.

Oh jeeze, you don't even look fat if that pic is you. Don't put yourself down like that, damn.

That isn't him.

i think it is actually

that's not what made me have anorexia or whatever

I've just always hated my body as long as I can remember

I just gained weight from that incident and then had to work hard to lose it

not me

this is me
puu.sh/koWQ9/2128b57223.JPG

compared to you I am landwhale

yeah that would be sooner considered anorexic than fucking fat

other people don't look fat to me even if they're a little overweight

I feel like I'm obese sometimes
lately I just feel like I'm overweight and disgusting

I'm sure you're fine
you don't have a lot of fat in your face so I'm sure you're fairly thin and it's just a meme

Nigga you look incredibly thin. More so than the last picture.

What said. There's a difference.

I'll never be happy with my body.....

nothing people tell me helps, even though I know they're right

puu.sh/nXLkr/092223238d.jpg

nah, I'm p fat it just is only visible from the sideview. pic fucking related

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

yeah I know, it's weird that I look completely non-landwhale from the front though.

Don't worry, I'm going to lose 50 pounds in arizona

You know there are therapists just for those reasons that have been proven to help you with issues like that?

squats and cardio

you need to lose weight but you could be even worse off than you are now, if you cut alcohol and sugar out of your diet you'll start losing weight, combined with eating healthy and light exercise you'll drop really fast

do you want to lose weight?

good luck, I know you can do it! c:

I'm ashamed.....

and part of me believes that nothing can fix it and I'll always think I'm fat

theres literally nothing wrong with your body
the crux of your problem is mental and not physical
the bullying kinda fucked up ur brain

u probably need a pill or hypnosis or a hardcore drug trip to set you straight

Have you ever considered actually getting help for this? This is a pretty serious mental issue.

But uh, nothing to really be ashamed of. Everyone has their issues.

I don't actually drink often, I just wanted to get drunk tonight. and I am enjoying it

＞tfw killed my keyboard by spilling half a shot of whiskey on it
thank Christ I have a backup

just unplug it and wash it in the sink, then let it dry m8. dont be so dumb next time

danke mr magic man. I sall try that when I am no longer an alcohol

see this is why drinking is bad

I was right all along

/s

...

I am fucking GR8 M8

I wish I were that rad

it's no Soju or Vodka

impressive chugging tho

...

...

You don't look fat to me, Nezi.

kill me

why are you up so early

just go fug, its pretty easy

>tfw no currently chugging bleach

directed at myself btw im no bully

anyway nini @ thread

thank you lexi

nini

goodnight, bitch

im not going to bed its only 4:12
was saying it to nezi

I am become alchahol, destroyer of livers.

They just say it cause they know it gets to you.

there is a new thread

No one linked it

but i just wanna stay home today ;;

Also no there isn't o.o

firefox stop eat nametrip pls

Set

sorry, I lied..

He's playing you, my friend.

Fuck that noise mate, just go play video games.

I accepted the invitation long ago and I'm going in 10 minutes.

fuck

...

stop..

i am ashamed of myself, i confess my sin.
I speak falsehood to people I hold dear.

please forgive me

...

Sounds like you made a horrible life choice.

i confessed, stop judging me ;-;

I don't think I will.. you think forgiveness can be so easily obtained?

I am sure subtle is merciful

...

good bye

Didn't quite catch that steam message you sent last night. I'm not usually up at 1AM.

Ok I forgive you
Bye :c

oh well at least I'm happy

What kinda things did you say?

lewd snapchats and messages

gaybay's this way brae

Unless you sent something to your boss I think it's probably alright ^^

I don't have a job

hooray for being crazy

Thank you, your grace

Finally, we have something in common, subtle.

lol okay, replace boss with your relatives or something then, that's when you really fucked up

You don't seem too faded right now

There are other things too!
But I'll be leaving you to join the 1920x1080 race soon

What other things.. I have been trying to find one

You are going to start a new life soon? When?

I was looking at the catalog for a new thread.
Mana tricked me.

Oh nvm lol

Erm, we enjoy some of the same games
Idk how much anime you watch..

Like, end of this month, when I move to a new house

Hmm.

Alright. See you Sunday.

Im sorry I wasted your time, surely you had a wonderful journey to the catalog :3

Finally madoka do a more natural hairdo, i wonder if she only lets very small number of people see her this way.

Where we barely play together..

I have given up watching drama anime,the feeling it made me feel is just too much.

The funny ones are still good

I am fuckin smashed

havent sent anything to relatives

Because you're on the other side of the world.. it's hard

Nooo, why! That's the reason you watch more, I love that feeling

Idk how you drink whisky, it burns too much :c

She doesn't have the twin tails in when shes getting ready for bed.

2 shots with a coke chaser and 3 shots inbetween 2 mixed drinks with coke

it didn't taste that bad but it was a bit spicy.

at this point I want to be sober but theres nothing in the house that is a sobering food and I can't sleep

Ahh yea only the ones that maybe viait her before she is going to bed would have been able to see her that way

That last one took me about 2 weeks to get over it, I didnt cry when i watched it but eyes got watery..

And subtle is such a busy person..

Don't ever leave me that long again :c

lightweight

Thats a good thing fam

You should've planned ahead and bought snacks..

What one was that?

I'm done with school stuff until September now!
But still maybe have to get a job, so busyness might stay awhile

Are you saying you want to see me that way, Mana?

Good evening.

Depends on the circumstance, I'd think.

Uhh I cant remember the title, the one about forest spirit that will disappear when normal human touched him.

Ahh summer holiday?

Yea.. Once in this lifetime.

Seeing a person in their alone time might come out as creepy

ohayou

*wanting to see

Ahaha
Hotarubi no Mori e
The one I told you to watch!
I'm glad it had that effect on you

Hell yeah ^^

( ´•̥ו̥` )

Hello there.

Im going to intercept this reply and make it mine

Yeaa their relationship ended with a everlasting hug for the spirit.

Dont you think, if we ever meet, it will be once on a lifetime chance, and i sure will hug you before boarding my planen never to be seen by you again.

howre you doing?

Gomenasai!
*hug*

It's such a lovely ending, I was gonna start watching another series written by the same woman

Manaka you're so pessimistic.. I plan to visit Asia more than just once in my lifetime :c
Though the thought of that does pull at my heart strings

That feel when waking up with a nosebleed and a headache.

You have ruined my night with your hospitality.

huh how'd I do that

damn, get better quick

Oh god.. A series full of melancholy.. Id give up at 3rd episode. You know Sakamoto desu ga? Im watching that.

Im.. Being realistic, my city is not a tourism spot. And going out of country is financially out of reach!

Being so damn nice. How dare you.

You okay? Is it because of the cold ?

imm sorry

lol check that out for a phone camera

About the time I go through my bags for painkillers again.

Yeah, I just get nosebleeds during the summer every now and then, too dry weather.
The headache I can't explain though, although I kept waking up every now and then.

This might sound like a joke bug banana for breakfast might fix your headache problem

I know of it! But I'm not watching it :c
How would you rate it?

That's alright, when I go abroad I generally don't like going to touristy places
Did you live there your whole life?

That's a phone?

Bug banana?
Now you've got me confused.
Although I feel like I haven't drank coffee in a few days, that could explain it too.
Also now you've reminded me that I need to buy apples.

yeah, galaxy s4 zoom

Even though Sakamoto is just.. Inhuman, his friends reactions whenever they see him doing Sakamoto things are hilarious. I have only watched 2 episodes so far, the time when the bullies plan to make fun of him and backfired got me laughing.

Well..I spent my college years in the capital, which is also not a tourism spot except if you are a fan of big cities around the world

Bug banana
But banana

Kill me now

I don't know Erin, how can I trust you that it's not just a camera in disguise?

It's alright Manaka, I'm on slow startup myself too.

...

Always keep like a box full

Well then, pretty neat.
Just bought it or?

I couldn't find any of my old mil painkillers, it seems that I've used all of them.
Oh well, aspirin might suffice.

Hey, james.

You know what my biggest problem with Rand is? She advocates, and encourages, as if it were a seldom seen thing in the lives of common people and the wealthy, selfishness and greed.

Which is just ridiculous. It's the philosophical equivalent of a tarantino film.

- Your bud.

yeah, pre-owned, £106 or something

needed an android replacement for my hotspot phone, i smashed the screen

Also why are you in Korea.

Sounds good, how'd that happen?

You've got the wrong person.

Pretty sure insider/kanra posts that izaya character still.

i dropped it while i was having a coffee at the seating outside costa :c

cause i gotta top it up to get internet to tether, i don't normally top up my iphone cause i have calls and texts on the droid phone, and i took it out to text someone and accidentally threw it on the ground

I hope it calms down, I couldn't sleep last time cause my head hurt so much

That's not him. he's been pretty depressed lately. you should Steam him and cheer him up

and my DSLR camera is in storage, so i figured i'd replace it with the camera-y-est camera phone i knew

I'm neither of those guys. Why aren't you in Korea?

I'm glad you're enjoying it, truly funny series like that are a rarity

Teenage years in the capital, that sounds really cool

They do, but that's Orihara, some other old poster, and to clarify they're from Russia.

Sounds like pretty bad luck then.
That does actually make sense.

I tried to get some prolonged sleep, but that didn't really work out.

Pretty much this.

Tell him i'll come to the thread more often, if he'll come.

Why's he depressed?

Shoot yourself.

You seem a tad upset, friend.

Where do you guys keep figuring out what I used to go by, no one has said shit.

That is where you are wrong, Bard pointed it out at you in one thread last week.

This community is full of pathological liars, and schizophrenics, and you will regret every hour spent substituting a potential social circle for the chance at feigned interest by those in your exact situation.

Eventually you'll become gay and transition into a woman.

Your parents weep.

That bastard.

Lmfao it's the internet dude, calm down. Sounds like you're the one that expected too much from an online image board.

Vino go to bed :^)

I expected a lack of crippling autism and i was left disappointed.

I'm not vino, i am an ancient evil.

Do i need to bring up the memes?

In which case I will reiterate that you are on the fucking internet. That's your fault.

You win, nerd.

Do i need to bring up the paedophilia.

*unzips duck* You asked for this.

So who's still here, anyway.

I'm genuinely impressed this community still exists. I predicted total collapse literally a year ago.

I have no fucking clue. Anyway who is dis? I'm starting to doubt now.

Which Australian is this?

Either another Izaya or someone called Crust.

Learn your ancient posters, boy.

I'm THE Australian shitposter.

Ugh it's probably that weirdo Todd.

1. Australian poster
2. Really arrogant
Ding ding ding, SteveAn.

Literal who.

Anyhow time to get some things done, play nice kids.

Never.

Isn't Izaya Kanra?

Yes

Says the one posting anonymously themselves.
I can give you a face if thats what you need.

No, see and and

No.

This.

I don't really think so

Yeah figured, you're like the exact opposite but I think he called himself Izaya once and uses that avatar.

If you don't wear panty hoses you're p gay

I don't, and I'm not. Thanks for the info, though.

Post panty hose then, gay boy.

Sorry, but that's gay.

hmmm, not sure if I'm allowed

I am giving you permission

hmm but so public

Whats a panty hose?

Is it about to get gay in here?

Sorta like a fire hose, only it fuels the fire

Thats strange. Why would someone invent that?

It's not meant to be applied to fire

What do you use it for then?

Oh, i don't use one, i'm perfectly comfortable with my fire hose thank you very much

this, its for the legs

Oh okay.

Oh its that thing!

it's great

Do you wear one right now?

uhuh

Can i see~?

hmmm..
I guess I can show it one time..
But only one!

Tokai are you intoxicated?

Thank you~

loods are you not intoxicated?

Yesterday at club some girl who was with the party i arrived with was trying to dance with me and her boyfriend bought me drinks.
afterwards i said to her, pretty seriously that i really appreciate that they want to have a threesome but that i have to decline on the count of her boyfriend being china

Judging from her reaction they were not trying to menage o casper me, but it was still really fun to say

now you can't say I never do anything

I feel kinda odd tbh, but good odd

no probs

Get a load of this guy.

C-cute~

clean your room/10

hmm?

thank youuu

but thats my old school desk thing, memories

P-post cock please

...

heeeh

nnonoonononoono

W-why not?

2lood

Aww okaaaay. But i like lewd...

HUE that's pretty funny

A friend of mine got a girl asking him how he liked his coffee, he responded that he liked it like his espresso, quick and dirty. She responded 'thick and creamy'.
She stopped responding when he said 'I have something thick and creamy for you'
#Worth it

Are you wearing a dress too? Holy shit Tokai

T-tokaichan x////x

I like slow

n-no it's just those modern long shirts I swear

heheh

new