Artemis Fowl Cast Announced

archive.is/tVBNQ


This thing is gonna flop harder than Nu-Busters did.

I FUCKING KNEW IT. Literally the first time news came out about this, I said "inb4 they cast a nigger as Butler"

OP tricked you.

Nope, it's a nigger alright.

FUCKING WHY

lol

they literally are

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I will be okay with this as long as they cast someone attractive as his sister

Judi Dench admits to having a a tattoo of his initials on her arse

Literally what are these about I was always more of a Percy Jackson guy, what the fuck was this series about, I never gave a single shit about it and never picked up the books once.

From what little I remember it's about Faeries. I also remember Artemis Fowl himself being a huge fucking prick.

Some rich kid pisses off fairies and starts a war more or less and then they help each other out in various situations afterwards where Artemis tries to steal what he can from the feires

Artemis Fowl is one of those stories that works better as a book. On screen this is all going to look like a stupid CGI cartoon.

Also what's with all the racism on this board holy shit

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FUCKIN this x1000 xd, peeps are mad craz here. I'm black but like *sucks teeth* I be real witcha we gon fuck deez birdshitskins up. I fuck white bitzhez erry day. Muh dick.

I don't know what this guy got for writing the sixth Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy book, but I hope it was at least 5-10 years

I could swear there was a cartoon/movie of this already.

Literally what the fuck is that

fuck off, Potterfag

It's one of those Golden Compass books.

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FTFY

Personalityless teenager discovers he's a super special chosen one story #6000432

NONONONONO
Artemis Fowl was my favorite book series growing up. Disney plz dun do dis;_;


Oh ffs. EVERYONE WHO READ THE BOOK SAW BUTLER AS BASICALLY AGENT 47.
Blacked again I s'pose


Goodbye cruel world. I bet Foaly is a my little CGI pony

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fairies and dwarves and all the gay irish shit exist all teched up but they hide underground because they got rekt. teenage son of mob boss has big brain and decides to kidnap a leprachan in order to jack that pot of gold
the rest is "muh environmentalism" and so on and so forth

Those are some great trips you've got there, but your post indicates that you need some cheering up

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Or maybe you just need better taste in kid lit.

No, it's Artemis exploiting the gay "oh so advanced holier than thou" faeries' environmentalism for fun and profit.


We all had a childhood user

there is the time when he steals a guy's entire wealth and donates it to Amnesty International

gg disney, no re

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Yeah, it gets pretty uneven after the first two books

wtf is this shit and why it gives me ben10 + doctor who vibes?

because your a fucking idiot

this tbh

can't unsee

fuck youre right its kino

What in the actual fuck? What cracksmoker got put in charge of this-

Ah. I see.

Nice trips! Too bad you're samefagging your own post.

Don't mind the cavecrackers. This board is ~80% black. Welcome brother.

Didn't one of the last books shit the bed in terms of plot?

It's all ironic. Holla Forums is well-known as the blackest board on Holla Forums.

NO FUCK OFF WITH THE DIVERSITY SHIT ALREADY


this

THEY FUCKING CHANGED ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT MALE CHARACTERS INTO A WOMAN AND YOU FAGGOTS ARE ONLY WORRIED ABOUT WE WUZ BUTLERS AN SHEEIT?

I bet they cast Artemis with a jew.

How would that even work? Root is a stereotypical angry boss, he is constantly red and screaming.
Doesn't that also fuck up Holly's story? She's supposed to be the first woman in the force, that's another reason why her fuckup is that bad.
This is shaping up fucking horrible. It should have been an animated movie.

An 11 year old Wunderkind kidnaps an elf woman, keeps her chained in a basement and threatens the elf government that he'll start world war 3 if they don't pay him ransom. Elves try to kill him instead, but he knows their laws.

doesn't he even have a tattoo on his head? or was it his arm?

Kek you fucking loser

Was it autism?

Pretty much. I was already having doubts when they announced that the first film would be a combination of the first two books but this is blatantly raping the source material. This shit is gonna be dead on arrival, Fowlfags would be pissed because Disney shat on the books and refuse to watch it on principle while normies wouldn't give a shit because the AF series is about a decade past its glory days.

If that's what you call Kenneth Branagh doing again what Kenneth Branagh always does when he thinks he's making PURE KINO, then yes, yes it was. He did it in Thor, why is anyone surprised he's doing it here too?