Prison story thread

Caleb Cooper
Caleb Cooper

So have any of you anons been in prison before?? if yes what were you arrested for?? and why?? post your stories.

Jaxson Jenkins
Jaxson Jenkins

one time in prison lol

Gabriel Diaz
Gabriel Diaz

6944771
6944770
6944775
Learn to sage newfag my god.

Kayden White
Kayden White

I've been to jail a couple times. It sort of sucked, but never served time.

Jeremiah Price
Jeremiah Price

I've been to jail a couple times. It sort of sucked, but never served time.

What were you arrested for?

Parker James
Parker James

selling drugs
possession of drugs
possession of gun in state where it was illegal

Hudson Jackson
Hudson Jackson

What kind of drugs user?.

Colton Barnes
Colton Barnes

be 18
dumb young retard
shitpost on 4chan all day, barely any friends
no gf
be desperate as fuck
start getting a fetish into stalking girls, not online, but IRL
over the course of a month or two I work my way up to looking through girls windows of random houses near my block
i in particular liked one girl, she was around my age, sexy as hell
get idea in my mind that i could have a life with her
i wait for her to come back from school one day
i knew she would always change her clothes after she got home
has tree outside window so i can watch
1 month later
watching her undress before bed
slowly watching her peel off in her room
masturbating while watching of course
i see her start masturbating on the bed
her ripe banana starts making a huge mess from it being so rough
i started laughing
that feel when i lost the game
catches me, i see her get up and call the police
jump down from tree and run away as fast as i can
they do large as search for me, basically they end up getting me
spent years in jail
To this day, I think of the bananait was truly a glorious day for the YLYL thread

Hudson Stewart
Hudson Stewart

selling drugs
was a bunch of stuff
possession of drugs
was heroin

Blake Martin
Blake Martin

6944865
6944863
6944860

LOL newfags dont know how to sage.

Angel Richardson
Angel Richardson

heroin is dope.

Jaxson Roberts
Jaxson Roberts

Definitely my favorite.

Xavier Phillips
Xavier Phillips

6944903
This banana picyute makes me laugh. It's funny, because it looks like it's naked.

Nicholas Kelly
Nicholas Kelly

Fucking creep

Noah Ward
Noah Ward

Smoked some funny stuff and broke into my semi-estranged father's house because I needed a place to rest. I hung out for a few hours, took a shower, listened to music, took some beers from the fridge. Was going to wait for them to come home and apologize for cutting the screen door on the porch, but my wicked stepsister showed up, called the cops and had me arrested.

The arrest was kind of brutal, though. The cop didn't remove the handcuffs when he put me in the back, and I was completely compliant. I told him they were too tight, so what does he do? He opens the trunk and gets these heavier handcuffs to put on me, like for a gorilla or something. Then I sat in the back of the car for like an hour while they talked to my stepsister and decided what to do with me. She had the ability to have me freed, but decided to be a bitch and told them to take me. The whole time, I had to go to the bathroom so bad, I thought I was gonna die, but the cop wouldn't let me urinate. So that's two forms of extra-judicial punishment for a family matter that could have been resolved without the use of the police.

I was only in the holding cell at the jail for a few hours until I got bonded out, but that was a medieval experience in itself. It was filthy like it hadn't been cleaned in months, not fit for a dog. They let the place go to hell because it was the old jail that was still being used while the new one was being built. I was one of the last inmates who got to go to the old, shitty jail for my only arrest, lucky me. The cell had a heavy door with a little window so they couldn't hear you in the lobby. The guard covered the window with a shade because I kept asking for stuff. It was very boring and claustrophobic. They gave me some literature on the "Prison Rape Elimination Act", but the text was comically small, like a person with good vision would need a magnifying glass to read it. A few hours passed and just as I was starting to doze off, I got released.

Got it dropped down from burglary to trespassing, and then adjudication withheld with probation, so no felony. The worst part is that I probably won't be at my father's funeral, but it's bittersweet because he traded his son for his new family that never accepted me.

Levi Perry
Levi Perry

That was hilarious, nice blogpost.

Jonathan Powell
Jonathan Powell

Nice pasta.

Alexander Bailey
Alexander Bailey

Good, I'm glad your amusement was an unintended consequence of my prose, because I wasn't attempting to be humorous, and I'm not normally one to contribute to datamine threads.

Unless you're laughing at my misfortune, in which case, suck a dick.

Evan Nelson
Evan Nelson

I once got detained, then my dad showed up to pick me up and he was MAD.

Jason Sullivan
Jason Sullivan

"hmm, hey buddy."
"yea friend?"
*cough* *clearing throat* "w-… what if…"
"what if the winners wrote the history books?"
"wait, what do you mean?"
"well, you know the winners of WWII who hit hiroshima and nagasaki which were civilian cities instead of hit the military bases and stopping the enemy that way, are the same people that tell us every day that hitler was a bad guy. doesn't that make you feel strange an-"
*GASP* WHOA BUDDY YOU'RE NOT MY FRIEND ANYMORE WHAT ARE YOU SOME KIND OF RACIST MISOGYNIST ANTISEMITIC HATE CRIME FREAK WHO HOLOGRAM TOASTER ROLLER COASTERS THE JUICE?
"oh my gosh, what!? but we have been friends for years!"
some completely random fucking person over dramatically smashes their head through the wall of your private home to eavesdrop
"Did someone say the wrong thing?"
"No can you just give me a chance to explain my ideas?"
"Thought Police have been alerted!"
"No! what the fuck! why?!"
a bunch of –armed soldiers of the state– police come and break your door down
they pull you out of your house
put you in restraints
throw you in a transport
including but not limited to a –concentration camp– prison bus
get thrown into a –prisoner concentration camp– jail for –critical thinkers– criminals
"but judge! pls no! I didn't mean it that way!"
"you are guilty of thought crime! just how the jews were considered guilty of having certain thoughts and beliefs!"
"but lets just overlook that as we treat you exactly the same way as we –the globalist zionist bankers– accuse the nazis of treating others to teach you a lesson for thinking anything but what we told you"
"you see we need to sink as low as throwing everyone who legitimately questions everything for valuable, smart reasons in nazi concentration camps to convince everyone that our story of what happened was the true story, and this gives people such as ourselves alot of credibility since we show that we are fully incapable of accepting any criticism or holding up our logic in any formal debate. LORD HAVE MERCY on those who come up with any evidence contrary to the claims of the current engineered paradigm!"
life ruined

always question everything. you may eventually find out who you are not allowed to question.

John Lee
John Lee

Never done time but been in cells for 24 hours 3 times.

and refused entry from a country once.

First time
Broke up with a girl so went to drink with only guy I knew some faggot off /r9k/

Tell him to not let me drunk drive

He said it would be funny if we crashed and died for the story

Take him back to my remote rural farm

Get drunk as hell on jack

He starts whining about no internet and beggs me to drive him to city to internet cafe for night

Drunk as fuck don't think and drive

Doing 160kphr roll car, rood caving in as slids on its roof

Some how we okay but I am bleeding a bit nothing bad just glass cuts

He gets out his phone and calls the Police

They put me in ambulance without arresting me yet

See my chance, ambulance is driving though jungle part towards the city, tell them I refuse medical treatment as it is my legal right make them stop and let me out

Run into the jungle and up a river because I know they have dogs out for me

Wait till im sober return to road as I hear helicopter overhead for hours

Cop car goes by arrests me right away

Locked in cells with no fucking water for 17 hours till pissed as fuck mother finally agrees to pick me up

In court this 5ft /r9k/ user actually fucking read a statement saying every detail how much he drunk ect but still didn't have proof and he had record for fake reports.

He lies says reason I drove was to see my ex gf.

Didn't get DIC but got a carless driving charge.

Time two…
See gf I broke up with that said she returned to her country actually in hostel on main street on down
She walks out of hostel says shit "I love you I love you but we can't be together" puts her head on my lap.

In rage I throw bottle of whisty into the wall.

Cop is walking by just then ask what is going on

Tell him to mind his own fucking bussiness

Me and cop start fighting, van full of cops pulls up and they gank the fuck out of me with nigh sticks

They chain me to a chair in the police cells and think I am on bath salts because at this point I am losing my shit

They call mental health people to come

They let me go after I talk to mental health people with no charge or warning

Wyatt King
Wyatt King

number 3

Drinking with my backpacker friend in hostel

Some arab cunt tries to offer me meth to get her to sleep with him

Fight gross arab, Police called because some curry muncher randomly grabs knife.

Police tell me to leave area, tell the to get fucked.

Say if I am not gone by the time they back out of the hostel they going to arrest me

Stay outside tell them to fuck off, arrested, spend time locked in a shitty cement box, no seat no blanket no water to toilet.

Piss under the door on their feet when they come to check me because no fucking where else to piss

Get sent home 24 hours after being locked up with formal warning for disorderly conduct

Now the refused entry.

Going to Mexico to bang LDR gf who is 17 from cali but have to meet with her and her parents when they on hoilday in mexico because for some reason my USA esta has suddenly changed to refused entry status

Fly to Chile, Get out at Chile spend day in city smoking weed and doing coke.

Fly to mexico, they send me to little room start asking me about some crime I did in USA wtf.jpg

First they say its murder then they say "no no talking to a child"

USA sent mexico some warning that I was a sex risk to minors because I had talked to some 15 year old girl ( legal my country ) on the internet lewdly

Ask why I am here, say to see my 17 year old girl friend

They say its illegal in mexico, say its fucking not and her parents invieted me to join them

Get locked up with some guy from gambia and some tibetan dudes.

Lose my shit punch holes in wall

Get put in ┼║ip ties and put on plane back to Chile

In Chile my security / immigration seems cool his jobs to put me on fight back to my home country

Ask him if I can just stay in Chile

He goes to a high up guy who calls mexico, he speaking in spanish and starts laughing his ass off.

Leads me to a door that goes out to Chile and says "There you go Chile!" ( AOC in Chile is 14 years old )

I would just like to thank LAN Chile airlines for rescheduling all my fights for free on the spot.

Also like to thank Chile immigration for not giving any fucks.

Fly back to home country forget I had tiny bag of coke in backpack

I get searched, little thing keeps saying coke.

They throw all my shit on table I CAN SEE THE BAG OF COKE

They look at everything but lot of trash at bottom backpack where bag of coke was in

They don't notice it, they bring over a FUCKING dog

DOG doesn't notice it, swap thing keeps saying COKE COKE

They Xray the empty bag and my shoes. Make me go to a little room and lift up my ball sack infront of two dudes.

Finally let me go… Ask if I need help repacking NOPE act mad throw everything in bag grabbing little bag of coke and rubbish first.

Ethan Campbell
Ethan Campbell

That coke part at the end made your other lame stories worth t.

Liam Price
Liam Price

Just story… if we just talking about run in with the law.

When I went back to my home country I had a Polish girl who came on hoilday to my country waiting for me at airport

We had been kinda seeing each other had sex once spent nights together kinda inlove but both had dumb internet LDRs

She was waiting HOURS while they searched me in airport for me crying

She her hug and my mum picks us up takes us to her house

End up in love being together

Knock her up and her visa expires so fly to Poland with her

One time in Poland I was really depressed and we started fighting I drink E-JUICE in sperg out attempt to an hero

Her granny calls Police and medic

Slav Police come and ambulance

ambulance guy says I have to options get arrested or go in ambulance to hosptial

Go to hosptial

Say I can't pay and just walk out

Spend time in hostel still seeing each other then living with some people off game ingress

After a week find some work

After two weeks get back with girl friend we worked everything out, stay hostel one night together then move back in at her parents

Now everything been stable and happy for 6 months no fighting or issues after I got some anti depressants.

We are more in love then ever.

Sebastian Campbell
Sebastian Campbell

This was kind more all the events that lead to me being stuck in Eastern europe to.

No return ticket gf doesn't want to leave and now can't fly due to being knocked up

I spent all savings 5k on south america fuck up

Yeah so now I am forced to be a slav and work for $3 an hour. Till one day we save enough and can immigrate back to my home country.

Oliver Ortiz
Oliver Ortiz

You can't drive? Visa issues or what?

Easton Flores
Easton Flores

I'm not from europe.

Nathan Ramirez
Nathan Ramirez

I can't drive over fucking ocean plus no car.

Ian Perry
Ian Perry

possession of gun in state where it was illegal

The fuck kind of country do you live in?

Carson Wood
Carson Wood

Yes. I had reason to believe my (now ex-) GF was cheating. I did not exactly catch them in the act, but they were together when I confronted them. He started towards me and I said, "Are you sleeping with my GF?" He said, "Yeah, I'm fucking her, what are you gonna do about it?" What I did about it was pick up one of my golf clubs (I was in the garage, they were in the driveway) and beat him with it until I heard sirens. I was sentenced to 3 years in prison. I had never been arrested before that.

While I was out on bail before being sentenced for the assault, I was arrested again for disorderly conduct. Since being released, I have not been arrested, but have been taken in for questioning after being falsely accused of rape.

James Allen
James Allen

Tell us about false claim of rape.

Also prison stories?

Anthony Morris
Anthony Morris

Notice how every story is because of a women.

catches me, i see her get up and call the police

I'll give pass to females on this one since user is a fucking creep.

my wicked stepsister showed up, called the cops

Broke up with a girl so went to drink with only guy I knew some faggot off /r9k/

I had reason to believe my (now ex-) GF was cheating

Women are fucking are destructive if I didn't have my current gf I would go MGTOW.

Juan Long
Juan Long

Also Holla Forums has a tiny user base the amount of criminals per captia is really high here.

Angel Gutierrez
Angel Gutierrez

Guards/Screws bring in some skinny beta/hipster fag into housing unit and let the boss of the tough guys / gang bangers know that he's charged with abusing a couple of pre teen black kids. The guy was some kind of teaching assistant at a school for autistic minorities or something. One of the lead gang bangers tells one of his underlings that the newfag had messed with someone in his family.

They make the hipster newfag feel all intimidated, typical nigger chants and noises and they make the newfag strip naked and force him to run around the bunk areas. As he's running around the gang bangers make people like me punch, kick, and trip him. Every time he falls, the gang bangers pummel him whiles he's on the ground. This goes on for a while until he starts crying. After about 5 minutes, he stays on the floor in the fetal position. The main gang bangers gather around and kick him until he's coughing up blood etc. After about another 5 minutes of this, the guards walk in, disperse the crowd and the bleeding newfag is carried out on a stretcher.

Connor Ortiz
Connor Ortiz

gang bangers make people like me punch, kick, and trip him

When I was in cells all I wanted to do was fight fat ass niggers because they told me to shut up.

When I was set out with others some random white guys covered in tats looked like he done a lot of time came over a fist bumped me and sat and talked nigger was to scared to come over and they had to talk me out of attacking him even he was bigger.

I fucking hate niggers so much I was in such a rage from cops already.

WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU DO WHAT NIGGERS/SPICS/WIGGERS ORDERED YOU TO.

Also tell me about the false rape.

Owen Kelly
Owen Kelly

Let me tell you a little somethin' about Reddit spacing

Owen Hall
Owen Hall

WTF is this reddit spacing meme shit. I never even go on reddit does it auto space your text or some shit?

Aaron Thomas
Aaron Thomas

You have to go back.

Sebastian Price
Sebastian Price

It is literally just some autistic divide and conquer bait, just ignore the faggots who post it tbh

Also continue with story time pls

Jacob Martinez
Jacob Martinez

be me
buy some fish
buy a dog
stay home drinking rum and shitposting instead of getting raped in prison because I am able to control my fucking temper
This could be you too if you people didn't act like literal niggers

Nicholas Gonzalez
Nicholas Gonzalez

Wow a lot of reddit fags on tonight.

David Reyes
David Reyes

I have never been arrested as I am not a nigger. There was a near arrest experience because of a feminist, though.

Xavier Barnes
Xavier Barnes

Wow, poor fucking babby. Do you need a bandaid for your booboo? Maybe next time try not breaking the law. The point of getting arrested is that it's not fucking comfy, dipshit.

Matthew Peterson
Matthew Peterson

Here, have an upvote.

Chase Bailey
Chase Bailey

Not me but happened to someone I know.

This guy comitted ebay fraud a bunch of times and had to serve 2 weeks in juvie. I guess they wanted to scare him a bit. Heard he got beat up inside and was a lot quieter after he got out. Also hes abusing drugs now. Pretty fucked up.

Aaron Collins
Aaron Collins

Maybe next time try not breaking the law

Everybody breaks the law. Ever jaywalk? You've broken the law. Ever get a traffic ticket? You've broken the law. What I did hardly rises to the level of an offense, it's more of a civil/family matter.

The point of getting arrested is that it's not fucking comfy, dipshit.

Lolno. They're not supposed to prevent you from using the bathroom. That's a medical issue. If I had a witness I could've sued the police department.

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